Paying off debt to freedom

natsplatnat

Have you eaten all that ice cream yet??

camz2017

natsplatnat wrote: »

Have you eaten all that ice cream yet??

Hey nats, is that even a real question? It's me were talking about... Yes I had the oreo ice cream and then got an oreo milkshake. Notice my like for Oreos?

Stupid boy annoyed me at work today, can't be bothered to go into detail, I am too tired but essentially he got owned by me as per usual and was left looking like a lil b**ch. After this we went for dinner after work with an old colleague and on the way from the toilet I passed him and made a sly comment about how he's gained weight and tapped his belly looool. I think I've got my anger out after his comment last week now. I find this diary quite therapeutic, in the sense it lets me evaluate my actions and be like ok I've done enough now, whereas before I'd never really consider anything I do and usually just carry on being a fiend much longer.

camz2017

Ok conscience set in, I have a delayed conscience which can hit me so hard. It kinda sucks as I can literally do anything and feel no guilt at the time, so I never know how bad the guilts gonna get me... As I've got older I've definitely got a much bigger sense of guilt.I know easy fix, don't be a tw*t, but easier said than done...

Anyway took the guy for lunch today as I felt really guilty, I was sitting next to him and I could just tell he was upset with me. He wasn't being like nasty to me but he just seemed down in the dumps. I felt like such a horrible person for like the first two hours at work this morning, like guilty in my stomach. Anyway took the guy for lunch... I didn't pay for the lunch, well I did but I will charge it back as we're on a client project & we discussed work a fair bit. He's too junior to understand budgets and thinks I paid, so it's the thought that counts right. I've also offered to help him with gym as he lives close to me, so I've basically said come to gym with me before work and I think I uncovered a raw nerve when I commented on his weight gain. Sometimes I'm way too good at identifying peoples insecurities.

In other news, I'm meeting a girl for dinner and kinda excited to see her. I dunno why but this week I just feel entirely drained to the core and feel like it's been work work work.

natsplatnat

Morning camz,
just checkin' in! A couple of comments from me...


Hope you are feeling better?
Oreos are over-rated! There are much better filled biscuits out there - jammy dodgers for instance!
Nice of you to make amends with your colleague - glad to see your conscience kicked in! I'm sure he will truly appreciate your help at the gym!
You seem like a genuinely nice guy on the whole... your hot-headedness and quick jibes appear to cause you regret and others upset, therefore definitely something to actively work on (no idea how, sorry).
Where has your signature gone? I was hoping to seem some financial update in there from you!
Too much work is definitely draining -especially if you've been under the weather! Time for a bit of r&r. Hope you had a great meal!

camz2017

I feel good the antibiotics absolutely helped me soooo much. Just got a major major headache left which I’m taking a bunch of meds for.

I’m not going to enter biscuit wars with you but I will just say Oreos are my weak spot and I can’t buy them else I eat the packet.

Yeah I think on the whole I’m a decent guy but as you mention I get hot headed and when I’m mad I struggle to not be vengeful.

Signature I was editing and somehow my iPhone highlighted it all and deleted it, changing it for a weird word like “forest.” I got mad and just accepted it was gone. I will get it back when I get five.

Food was good I drove her home from mine and chilled at hers, she paid for fish and chips in return. We then ate high volumes of ice cream...

camz2017

I feel good the antibiotics absolutely helped me soooo much. Just got a major major headache left which I’m taking a bunch of meds for.

I’m not going to enter biscuit wars with you but I will just say Oreos are my weak spot and I can’t buy them else I eat the packet.

Yeah I think on the whole I’m a decent guy but as you mention I get hot headed and when I’m mad I struggle to not be vengeful.

Signature I was editing and somehow my iPhone highlighted it all and deleted it, changing it for a weird word like “forest.” I got mad and just accepted it was gone. I will get it back when I get five.

Food was good I drove her home from mine and chilled at hers, she paid for fish and chips in return. We then ate high volumes of ice cream...

camz2017

So YNAB is down and I cannot manage my finances, instead I am listening to the YNAB Megamix which the site directs you to. The song is: "Your Debt Is Gonna Bury You"
https://soundcloud.com/iynab/yourdebtisgonnaburyyou?in=iynab/sets/budgeting-hits-2016

Plenty of good ones in here:
https://soundcloud.com/iynab/sets/budgeting-hits-2016
Perfect lol.

Scott_Weiland_2

camz2017 wrote: »

Thanks for asking,

Went to another doctor, urgent care centre, given antibiotics right away and told to go hospital if I have difficulty breathing. I've gotta go back once better as my heart rate was weird again... I hope the original doctor goes straight to hell, why on earth would anyone wait 3 hours in that surgery unless they were on deaths door!?! This might sound silly, but it felt like the original GP had something against young healthy people lol, like she saw me come in and immediately I knew I wasn't getting anything. She was like "you look healthy what's wrong?" I just thought, do you mean I'm not obese with diabetes lol. Then she was like "you are young, fit and healthy" when I was telling her I was about to die of lack of oxygen as the tonsils were blocking my airways lol... Then when I said I was sweating she basically hinted are you taking steroids, as if to suggest I cannot get in shape without using some sort of illegal drug, which I do not do btw. She was fat, bitter and miserable, looked pale and unhealthy like a ghost herself and didn't seem to want to help anyone she was jealous of. God she was such a cow lol, totally creeps me out thinking of her looking me up and down and commenting I look "fit" and healthy... I wish I had been like "yes unlike you." When I walked in her office and saw 2 cans of diet coke on the desk I literally thought here we go...

Anyway, just done a call for work and I sounded like a 70 year old man haha.

Hmmmmmm diet coke insulin spiking straight away springs to mind and aspartame yak

gerrrr I hate that re the steroids I get it all the time when I am at my gp too, I have had depression and was diagnosed in 2016 with bipolar my gp always asks re steroids if my mood is low every time. I think its a gp blame clause if your over 14stone and train 4 days a week and eat right. My last gp asked me if I was taking anything and I was so tempted to reply no but do you drink 8pints a night your bodyshape looks like you do. Narrow minded ness gerrrrrrrrrrr

camz2017

Hey Scott you make me laugh, just subbed to your thread and will take a read, prob wont make it through all 30 pages tonight but you'll hear from me.

I don't feel very big atm, only done gym once this week.

camz2017

Ok did some psychopath test a friend sent me and I got like 88%
http://psychopath.channel4.com/quizzes.html

Stupid thing. I thought I answered it fairly looool