LonelyRat's (not so lonely) Road to Riches

lonelyrat

Thank you guys It actually went a lot better than I expected I felt sick beforehand as I was so nervy, but it was OK in the end. New doctor was lovely, she was quite understanding and made me feel more comfortable than I have done before. She didn't immediately want to talk medication which was good. I mentioned that I was finding it frustrating as I couldn't identify the root cause of why I'm in such a muddle at the moment and then she talked me through a technique to try and identify it. But also told me to not worry, as there may be no cause.

She did decide to up my medication so am now maxed out on what I'm on. She said not to worry about that though as we may reduce it again, or change to something different, depending on how I get on. I've got to go back in 4 weeks and discuss how I'm feeling on the new dose. But if it doesn't agree with me I can go back before then.

Had the meeting with my TL. I was worrying about nothing (as usual). It was just a normal catch up - so it was actually fine. Turns out I do get a bonus this month, despite the disciplinary, so quite chuffed about that. It's £150, so not great, but it's £150 I didn't know I was getting Will aim to pay it to the debt but we shall see. I don't want to put too much pressure on right now. Debt is still all interest free and will be until 2020, so I can take a month while I get back on track.

Emailed phone insurance with my proof of purchase/ ownership for my phone so am hoping I will be getting it fixed. Never claimed on phone insurance before so unsure how it all works. My only other experience with insurance is the Copenhagen kafuffle (still ongoing :rotfl:).

Tomorrow there is no to do list. The only thing I really need to do is sort out where I stand with the finances. I will definitely be sitting down and totting up the damage. Needs to be done, but I'm not looking forward to it. Oh also, doingitanyway, I will be having a treat tomorrow for my good behaviour re: visiting GP. OH has said we can go do a hill walk somewhere am very much looking forward to it. Will be nice to get out and about somewhere different. Feeling decidedly un-fit so ideally this gets me back into walking.

Quite a positive post this evening - here's hoping there's more positivity on the way :cool:

lonelyrat

Ok, so have sorted where I am financially. It's not great, but not the end of the world. Debt is up by £1093.49 :eek: It's made up of a number of silly things. I lost the plot it seems. There are some returns that I can do, so that's something

No point getting too upset about it. It is salvageable.... Plan for this month is £50/ £100 to the debt depending on how I stand. Am going to do something EssexHebredian suggested on my old thread which was to do a new SOA (will base this on the last three months so covers good months and the last month, which was decidedly bad ) then use the remainder as spends/ debt repayments

BUT don't pay anything over and above the minimums until the end of the month this month while you make sure the new budget works. Once payday arrives again, pay everything left in the account from the previous month to the first debt to be targeted - and revise the budget as needed if you over or under allowed on any category.

I think this will help me get back in the swing of things and hopefully take the stress/ pressure off until I feel a bit more stable. Am hoping to find more of a balance going forward... Before I was keep to just rush through it and get debt free ASAP but this time I will try a more slow and steady approach.

Anyway, that's finances done for now. Am currently waiting till half 9 when I'm allowed to wake up OH and get going on our adventure

Toni'sfriend

I'm so pleased everything went well.

doingitanyway

Well done for facing up to the finances and getting back on track. Don't beat yourself up just put it behind you and keep going.

I hope you enjoyed your walk in the hills

lonelyrat

Thank you Toni'sfriend and doingitanyway

Off work and going to have a 'nothing' day. Will potentially borrow OH's phone and go a walk but it is quite grim and dark here. Constant smir and don't really feel like getting wet and cold... We shall see

Will be an NSD as all I have planned (other than maybe going a walk) is watching iplayer and having a shower. Started a new show last night called Killing Eve, it has good reviews and stars Sandra Oh (grey's fans will be happy haha!) Also finished a book yesterday so shall hunt about for a new one to read. Payday tomorrow so that's potentially lifting my mood.

Adventure didn't end up happening, but that's OK as it's my birthday at the end of the month and there is an adventure planned for then... I'm pretty sure it's camping but don't know where! Am feeling excited about that, although the control freak in me is a bit stressed at not being in on the plans.
I have time booked off for my birthday (10 days off :eek: an unnecessary amount of time, so I may recall a few) and there's only 6 more shifts to go until I'm off. It's all that's been keeping me going is knowing I've got time off soon

Have a lovely, relaxing (hopefully) Sunday everyone

redofromstart

Sorry to read about your challenges, I find walking really helps me. Sometimes putting one foot in front of the other is as much as you can do, but at least you are doing something other than giving in - thats what I tell myself anyway.

I have a backlit kindle, love it. Would live on beans to replace it. Keep an eye out for the kindle unlimited offers.

Lucifa73

Lovely to hear the positives in your posts! I think slow and steady makes sense, at least until both of you are earning!

I think a group is a great idea. I attended one when I had PND after having NJ and it was great to know I wasn't the only one feeling like that. Getting to the first one was a bit of a gut-churner though! Maybe get OH to walk you to the venue and meet you after?

Massive hugs. Luc x

doingitanyway

I can see things are improving for you little by little.

It's great that you have booked off time for your birthday too

lonelyrat

Redofromstart walking really does help, am just finding it really hard to get into for some reason - potentially as the weather's changed and it's quite grim here a lot.

Sometimes putting one foot in front of the other is as much as you can do

That's so true... A couple of weeks ago I couldn't even manage that. I am feeling miles better. Don't know if it was the meds being at the wrong dose or if I was just going through a really low time for some reason, but I feel well and truly on the way back to being a more cheery version of me now. The backlit kindle is a game-changer! Although my bedtime has gotten more erratic as I can't stop reading at night

Thanks Lucifa73 I've whiffed on calling anywhere ... I do really want to get myself organised with something.... Am just working up to it (slowly, as usual). I think it would help so much, I'm just v. nervy. OH would walk me if I asked, it's just a case of me getting brave enough to get something sorted.

Doingitanyway - Little by little!

This past week has been a bit up and down...

At my work there is a team who work on simplifying processes to make things better/ more streamlined for colleagues (and hopefully, by extension for customers). They were looking for a volunteer ... No extra money/ change to the job I currently do other than I need to put in some work at home. But I thought it would do me good to help with the stagnation I feel and to try and push myself out of my comfort zone. The colleague who runs it got back to me and said she was happy for me to be part of it so I was really excited!

Buuuuut the next day one of our Team Leaders pulled me off the phones and said that I'm not going to be able to do it and she mentioned my disciplinary warning and the fact that it means I'm not even supposed to apply for anything like that. I hadn't realised because it doesn't involve a change of role/ pay and doesn't seem to be anywhere in our policies... Initially I was really embarrassed and felt stupid for thinking that I could get involved but now I'm a bit frustrated.

There's no real benefit for me to do it, other than to make me feel a little less that my brain is turning to mush. Last review period I was rated as 'nearly successful' due to the disciplinary warning - which is totally fine and I knew it would affect applying for other jobs in the business/references for external jobs. It's just demoralising because I'm actively trying to be more successful and helpful to the business by offering to do more work and I've been knocked back, due to being so terribly unsuccessful. It's like they've got me in a loop of failure :rotfl:

It also made me feel uncomfortable because it wasn't a manager who was involved in the disciplinary process and I thought it was meant to be confidential. I think maybe I got the wrong end of the stick though and it's just me that needs to keep it confidential from my peers, not the TL's. Still made me feel a bit crummy that all the managers have probably had a number of chats about me.

All in all it's been a bit of a rollercoaster of emotions but I've decided it's a good thing. I was starting to sink into the job again and had forgotten my motivation for wanting to get out. This has kind of re-energised me to want to find something else to do. Just a few more months to go... If I keep my head down I will be fine.

ANYWAY... that's my whining over. In summary it isn't the end of the world Better things will be coming.

Hopefully we will still be moving down south at the beginning of next year. It could be hard to organise though and may be put on the back burner as OH still doesn't have a job and I'm nervy about moving with no money. Doesn't seem responsible or really feasible to be honest. My wage is ok to cover us for now but I don't have enough to make any real savings and really do feel for us to move forward he needs to get something. I'm worried as well as during the summer it was OK as he could say to prospective employers that he had decided to take the summer off after University. But now it's getting to the point that he's just 'unemployed'.

He really doesn't want a desk job but he's been applying for weird jobs. He just got knocked back from a potato processing plant... But he's never worked in a factory before and has a uni degree, so it kind of makes sense that he isn't their first pick?! I really wish he would stop being so picky but I'm feeling less stressed about it than I was which is good. Keep your fingers crossed he is employed soon and we can actually plan to move forward. There's quite a lot of jobs in the town we'd move to and i'm confident I could get something... Just need to get his confidence up.

I've been doing some overtime at work this week and have some scheduled for next week. Just a few hours after my shift but it's better than nothing. Might make an extra £30ish next month which would be good Only two more shifts to go until my time off so am quite happy

Got an email from the phone insurance approving my claim so called them back yesterday and they emailed me a postage label to send my damaged phone off. Should have a shiny new one in about 3 working days :cool: Phone call to the insurance went really well, which is a first! I made it through the conversation without stuttering or getting stressed and I wasn't nervy beforehand. I was very proud I do need a few days to recover before I attempt any more calls.. But I managed it all the same.

Payday has come and gone and have made a payment of £123.49 to the Virgin card - so new debt total is £1600. Also paid just over minimums to OH's cards and have money sitting in my direct debit account. Have a solid chunk available for spending this month and have already been tracking spends.

Have the day off tomorrow and will be heading into town to return some impulse purchases from Primark. Should get £23.50 back. I only went in for tights and socks and ended up buying a duvet cover, hangers and smart boots for work?! Don't know what happened there. Anyway, they will be returned I now have tights and socks and have no reason other than the return to set foot into any clothing store this month. Tomorrow OH will be coming with me to keep an eye on me and make sure I don't make any other purchases :rotfl:

We are just about to crack on with the extended version of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. My favourite films I have popcorn and a big bottle of diet coke as a treat (times have changed.... 5 months ago i would already be a few glasses of wine in by now!)

Enjoy the rest of the weekend everyone

Lucifa73

Morning Lovely ( I refuse to call you Lonely from now on so I changed a letter - much better!)

Glad to hear you feel on the up. Don't stress over the work stuff. Policy and process drive me nuts but it has to be seen to be followed. take the drive and find something else (although if you are moving might be better to sit tight until you get to go South?)

Could OH start looking at jobs in the town you plan to move to? If there's plenty on the go at the moment he might get something that means you can move on his wage and find something while you are there? Or you could start looking there too? When is it you hope to move?

I do the same in Primark. I go in for pants for the kids and end up with all manner of junk (fairy lights, duvet cover, lunch bag, tshirt for OH, Christmas decorations, Halloween junk...) although I never get clothes from me because they never fit!

Have you got any plans for your time off? Hopefully you'll be able to properly chill out, perhaps organise time with a group?

Take care. L