Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

teapot2

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

Thank you Teapot2 . I think I understand what you're saying. You're saying that stepdad is not trying to replace my mum, but to find companionship to help him cope with the loneliness? My mum and stepdad were together for over 40 years so I can understand that the loneliness must seem unbearable.

Maybe I should invite his ladyfriend too next time he comes to us for dinner. I don't know, I'd have to think about it. I haven't really had time to get used to it. I don't even know for sure yet if it has become romantic, so I don't really know what to think. I'll see what develops.

Thank you for your input . I am very grateful for everyone's perspective on this.

I'm sorry about your OH, it must be very hard for you .

thanks, yes it is hard but am taking it day by day. Maybe wait and see what develops and get some clarity about the situation before deciding what to do. I guess at some point you could ask your stepdad if he'd like to invite his friend to join you all for dinner as he might feel awkward too. I imagine it might be difficult for him to broach the subject of this friendship? I don't know how sensitive he is and whether he would worry that you'd be hurt by it?

tantaraza

I wish I could quote everyone but my phone won’t allow me to, which is very frustrating. Thank you so much for your lovely comments, I have now started a diary, which is here: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5952297/tantaraza-vs-the-frogs

I really appreciate all your support and encouragement :grouphug:

HHOD, I agree with beanielou, if it comes to borrowing from DS1, that would be better than owing your creditors (who would apply interest/late payment charges) IMHO. I’m sure DS1 wouldn’t want to see you and DH struggling when he has the ability to help.

I never got along with eBay but if you’re on Facebook, it may be worth joining a few buy/sell groups on there or posting your items on Marketplace? :think:

Good luck with those PPI claims!!

HairyHandofDartmoor

teapot2 wrote: »

thanks, yes it is hard but am taking it day by day. Maybe wait and see what develops and get some clarity about the situation before deciding what to do. I guess at some point you could ask your stepdad if he'd like to invite his friend to join you all for dinner as he might feel awkward too. I imagine it might be difficult for him to broach the subject of this friendship? I don't know how sensitive he is and whether he would worry that you'd be hurt by it?

Yes the whole situation is very tricky I think. Sometimes stepdad can be over sensitive and sometimes a bit 'autistic' so it's hard to tell. My sister being braver than I am has actually asked him if it is friendship or romance (as he asked if they could come and stay and she only has one spare room) so hopefully that will clarify things.

HairyHandofDartmoor

tantaraza wrote: »

I wish I could quote everyone but my phone won’t allow me to, which is very frustrating. Thank you so much for your lovely comments, I have now started a diary, which is here: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5952297/tantaraza-vs-the-frogs

I really appreciate all your support and encouragement :grouphug:

HHOD, I agree with beanielou, if it comes to borrowing from DS1, that would be better than owing your creditors (who would apply interest/late payment charges) IMHO. I’m sure DS1 wouldn’t want to see you and DH struggling when he has the ability to help.

I never got along with eBay but if you’re on Facebook, it may be worth joining a few buy/sell groups on there or posting your items on Marketplace? :think:

Good luck with those PPI claims!!

I'm glad you've started a diary of your own Tantaraza, I'll go and subscribe to it in a minute .

DS1 would be very willing to help I know. We'll see how desperate we get.

I've heard good and bad feedback about timewasters on ebay and FB marketplace. I guess I should be pro active and just give them both a go. I don't know why I find it so difficult to do .

elizabethhull

carbootcrazy wrote: »

Love your account of your Lucky Dip Tea dilemma:rotfl:


I have a tea dilemma myself at the moment but of a different kind to yours. Last Summer a friend gave me a huge bag full of weird and wonderful Twinings herbal and fruit teas. She was given a massive glass storage jar full of assorted teas as a gift. Not liking any kind of tea except standard Tetley's, wanting to empty the jar and use it and knowing I'm a tea addict she gave them all to me. To be honest there aren't all that many 'non standard' teas I like with Camomile; Mint; Ginger&Lemon and a few others being the only ones. This selection contains flavours like Intensely Liquorice & Mint; Ginger Bread Green Tea; Turkish Apple Tea; Cherry Bakewell Green Tea; Salted Caramel Green Tea; Intensely Beetroot Burst ; China Rose and many others:eek:. The Liquorice & Mint is quite nice but the others that I've tried are definitely an acquired taste:rotfl:.
.

I don't drink tea at all, but I find that fruit teas can be used in cupcakes, both in the batter and the icing and give a really delightful flavour. I tried it with a Forest Fruits one, and it turned the icing pink too !

jwil

eBay is easy for selling. There are timewasters, but the good buyers outweigh the bad ones.

With clothing, put actual measurements of the item as well as the stated size. That will reduce people saying it doesn't fit. As long as you are accurate with your descriptions and highlight any imperfections you shouldn't have any issues.

You can set up your preferences to block certain buyers (i.e. those with history of non payment etc) which can help minimise the hassle. If you want help with that I can let you know how to do it.

I think everyone gets 20 free listings a month (a lot of people get 100 a day). You'll pay 10% final value fees on the end price and the postage, and then there's paypal fees too. I always use 15% for both ebay and paypal as a rough guide. eBay periodically do listing offers where there is a reduction in FVF (I've got one at the moment). Always check the postage costs before listing so you know you've got it right!

For me eBay is a no-brainer compared to FB - I achieve much higher prices, and don't have half as many timewasters. Others say the opposite.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Thank you Jwil . I really should give it a try.

HairyHandofDartmoor

I'm up to £29.05 on One Poll now so I only need another 95p to cash out! I also did an 80p survey on PA so will have over £6 available when they are approved. Slowly but surely .

WannabeFree

Jwil is the eBay queen, all I will say about FB marketplace I really don't like the idea of people coming to my house. It gives me really bad anxiety when a relative comes so 'strangers' is just something I can't do. So I just go to eBay from the start.

Its always worth a go

x

HairyHandofDartmoor

You're right Wannabe, that's a very good point. I think strangers coming to my house would make me very stressed indeed :eek:. Ebay it is then .