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diary of strugglin working mum

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  • needless to say he is now an ex and luckily my fiance is much more generous and doesnt have any desire to use my toiletries.
  • BartGirl
    BartGirl Posts: 510 Forumite
    I have had 2 terribly busy working days and probably another one today..not!!

    I'll split this post into 2 parts:

    1. normal life and 2. finance (after all - this is the DFW forum!)

    1.Normal life:
    I went to Ikea as planned the day before yest. Unfortunately i ended up spending more than planned. Was meant to spend £40 ish but ended up £60 ish..:eek: Mainly because DS and i had lunch there; plus i saw one or 2 little bits costing a fiver each- which i decided to add to the shopping basket..On the plus side - DSs room is looking really nice now much to OHs surprise when he decided to come home after midnight..on a work night as well..:confused:

    Yesterday I did up the living room floor which took me the better part of the entire flippin day.. In between i took DS to the park - twice! Cos felt so so guilty that my time was being taken up with the flooring and not on him. We went to the park as well on my way back from the GPs. I decided to request help for my situation cos i'm not sure that i'll be able to last the year without a counsellor or something. I was worrried about welling up while i explained my situation to her - and i didnt want DS to see me like that, so i wrote her a small note telling her everything. Well. There was no need to have worried about me falling apart as she had one of the stiffest upper lips i've seen for a while! I was in there for all of 2 mins..she said she;d not prescribe anti-depressants as not necessary at this stage (not that i wanted any anyway) and said that she'd put me down for a referral for a counsellor - i should wait 2 weeks to hear back from them..So on way back took DS to park - and stayed an hour cos neighbours were there too and DS played with their kids too..
    So continued the flooring after 7pm till gone 10!! Everything aches now!! And OH rolled in at 3 a.m.once again shocked out of his brains. Was trying to ask me all sorts of questions but i was out of it..One pertinent question was "why didnt you tell me about all this i would have helped you?" the answer being "[strike]you have no patience; are always snapping; dont require your input, you're never home and i spend most of my time in here so shall have it the way I want thank you very much[/strike]" "It needed to be done".

    To touch on the point about him helping out - we have a coffee table with a broken leg. Been like that for months. Its simply missing a screw..we've got all the tools we need..has he fixed that yet ? Has he heck...which is why i'd rather DIY !

    So today is another day - DFW'ing must go on!! - the sun's beating down here, so have put washing in - and shall head to market for fruit and to deposit the cash in my savings.


    2. Finance
    Before we went to Ikea, I had the Ebay item collected from a lovely Grandad. He gave me my tenner - which i'll be depositing in my savings this morning. Mr Provident Man arrived at the same time!! But he was ever so discreet..bless! I owe him only £200 now.
    Savings gone up to £492.58 and am expecting another tenner from a mystery shop in there later - am hoping that with today's deposit, i'll have hit the 500 mark!! I shall have to pay the council £240 for this months installement - leaving me not much to live on through to month end - the plus side is that i have everything in that i need for this month anyway!
    I also have a load of stuff on Ebay I listed on Ikea day - with a handful of watchers already. Quidco shall hopefully pay out almost £100 cos i did my iunsurance through them - and since this month i've had nothing spare from my earnings to go into my savings - this'll be lovingly received!! :T

    See you all later..have decided once i've got my fruits etc in i shall do completely-nothing-all-day!
    CC1: [strike]1,500[/strike] CC2:[strike]£830[/strike] Vanquis [strike]£1500[/strike] £2000 left
    S.Elec: [strike]£258[/strike] £ 0
    CT [strike]1734.52[/strike] £ 0
    Ebay £ 10.00 /MystShop £ 17.00/Quidco £ 0 so far!
  • Mollymop5
    Mollymop5 Posts: 2,095 Forumite
    Well done BartGirl, hopefully the counsellor will be very helpful and give you the support you need. I'm sure you've done a great job on the floor.Men bah! who needs them! £500 in savings :T You're on your way out of there :)

    Don't forget I'm here if you ever want to let of steam.
    lost my way but now I'm back ! roll on 2013
    spc member 72

  • BartGirl
    BartGirl Posts: 510 Forumite
    Got fruit and veg for £ 7 yesterday, and in true MSE style also nipped into Wilko to get Stardrops ;) which i shall be making good use of while i blitz my home..They had Jasmine rice on for half-price in the Sale corner - which i decided to buy cos its the one used in the chinese shops..
    Also managed to get OH to buy us a Chinese Take-away; which i havent done for ages..he also forked out £20 for it and drove us there - so the petrol was his!!
    Am meant to go out visiting today but my motor is snowed under..lets see if it clears up in due course..
    CC1: [strike]1,500[/strike] CC2:[strike]£830[/strike] Vanquis [strike]£1500[/strike] £2000 left
    S.Elec: [strike]£258[/strike] £ 0
    CT [strike]1734.52[/strike] £ 0
    Ebay £ 10.00 /MystShop £ 17.00/Quidco £ 0 so far!
  • BartGirl
    BartGirl Posts: 510 Forumite
    I finally called Women's Aid for advice. I have made an appointment for Fri next week - she said that she can give me legal, practical etc advice. I'm actually looking forward to the meeting!

    I have also told my supervisor at work that i'm going through problems at home. It was awkward cos he's a bloke, and you could see that he wanted me out of the room asap!;) prob cos i was teary etc but i figured that if i need the odd day Off at the last minute, i wouldnt want them to think i was !!!! taking. Also one / two people have caught me in the toilets upset etc so i figured best i let someone at work know what's going on..

    I'm still waiting for the referral from the counsellor though..

    Money-wise i'm still proper skint and need to pay my CC and Council Tax this week sometime..it'll leave me with v.v.little to live on, :confused: but at least i'm in a position where i can pay it - this time last year ?? No chance!
    CC1: [strike]1,500[/strike] CC2:[strike]£830[/strike] Vanquis [strike]£1500[/strike] £2000 left
    S.Elec: [strike]£258[/strike] £ 0
    CT [strike]1734.52[/strike] £ 0
    Ebay £ 10.00 /MystShop £ 17.00/Quidco £ 0 so far!
  • Ellidee
    Ellidee Posts: 6,216 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Aww hun so glad that you've bitten the bullet and will be getting some help.
    Well done ! I am so pleased for you. Things CAN & WILL only get better. Big hugs ((((())))) XX El
    Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task. William James
  • Mollymop5
    Mollymop5 Posts: 2,095 Forumite
    Fantastic news on making that appointment.I'm really proud of you :) Things can only get better now.Keep your chin up :)
    lost my way but now I'm back ! roll on 2013
    spc member 72

  • Great news that you've contacted them BartGirl, you really do deserve to have your life back! Hope they can help you, and look forward to seeing the updates tomorrow

    Sarah x
    'We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars' - Oscar Wilde
  • BartGirl
    BartGirl Posts: 510 Forumite
    Oooh i'm so broke!
    Oh well - at least I'm not struggling to make ends meet - well - I am; but i've got enough to manage..does that make sense? :rolleyes:

    Something's happened that I'm undecided about - perhaps you could advise me.
    I've received a 'letter' addressed to me from MBNA credit cards dept. Offering me a CC with 0% balance transfers till May 09. I have not got great credit - it said 'fair' last time i checked (summer 07) and the last thing i've applied for that required a credit check was the (one and only) Vanquis CC i currently have - with a horrific 30smthng%APR!! I'd also applied for a Goldfish one in May07 but was declined.

    This is my question:
    Should I apply for it anyway - and sod how it'll affect my credit rating - cos i currently have £800 on the Vanquis one - and am paying it off at £100/month at the moment.
    Or hold fire and not apply at all ?
    CC1: [strike]1,500[/strike] CC2:[strike]£830[/strike] Vanquis [strike]£1500[/strike] £2000 left
    S.Elec: [strike]£258[/strike] £ 0
    CT [strike]1734.52[/strike] £ 0
    Ebay £ 10.00 /MystShop £ 17.00/Quidco £ 0 so far!
  • Just wanted to say I love reading your diary as im a mum in debt too and my hubby works 50+hours a week too. SO know how you feel hun HUGS X
    SAVING FOR OUR FIRST HOUSE DEPOSIT

    15,000 NEEDED /35,000 SAVED SO FAR! :j
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