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Dancing through the rain with a smile and good cheer
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Boo to less spoons
Hope that you get through the day.I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
"A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb. ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.0 -
Dear Diary, MSE friends and any one else !
Have been meaning to come back to my diary and my friends diaries for months but RL was a distraction.
So here we are the start of the last quarter in the year and I am determined.
I will save And post in stages, as I’m at home in bed with the lurgy, so will need to pace....
Despite being back in work, I am struggling both mentally and physically at the moment. My mantra is “Keep plodding” nicked from a special MSE friend...
2018 so far
Work......
Well rereading earlier posts when I left you I was leaving a role. Which I did with much relief....
I had applied for my old job back .... I was devastated at the time when despite my referee and future manager being certain I had got the job, i according to the area manager missed it by 2 points.
However, although I keep telling myself that I need to have faith in him up there... I was really struggling with not knowing what my future held.
Then out of the blue I had an interview for a role Similiar to my old job. I was over the moon to get it.
I started on 1 July, smooth beginnings oh no... new role, heavy case load, and trying to cope with the hot weather, frankly not great. Late 20C’s and all I wanted to do is be asleep! Fatigue levels hit the roof.
Now despite a holiday I have the lurgy, and I have had to have sick leave.
Interestingly despite this being a contact giving employment advice to disabled people, the HR support guiding my manager ( who is managing for the first time) is less than helpful.
I am currently feeling out of control at work....As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Welcome back and keep plodding xxI get knocked down but I get up again (Chumbawamba, Tubthumping)0
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Physical
Well I am home with the lurgy, have tried to battle through it, but today, off sick and spent most of the day in bed, or on the sofa, currently crochet squares and watching Miss Marple.
I have struggled through the summer. Heat and me don’t mix.
I have been going to the oestopath once every three weeks, and that’s not good, usually once a month.
I have had had a break from Pilates, as my teacher and I couldn’t work out the same day now I am working, so in the end I have had to make the difficult decision to change to another teacher after nearly 7 years. However as a friend and therapist has said to me I need to do the Pilates for my wellbeing. So went back last week, and booked in for this week.
I am awaiting IT kit via access to work - primarily voice recognition this so I can minimise the pain in my shoulder when I’m typing. Employers have taken an age to sort it.
The verdict is reallly our whether I can cope with work even part time. Which is impacting my mental health.:o:o is how I feel at the mo
As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Lovely to have you back, though sorry it’s not under more positive circumstances. I hope you can get all your things in order soon XxDebts @ LBM £23,729.31. Debts @ 08/04/2016 £0 :j
Best win so far - holiday to Florida0 -
Why on earth would you feel
:o:o?
Mind you I feel:o:o that I dont work.
Sorry that your HR are being less than supportive. :mad::mad::mad:
Keep plodding:p:p xxx
I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
"A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb. ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.0 -
Why do I feel
:o:o
Firstly probably not the right emoji, but visually how I feel.
Because my anxiety levels are sky high, and I feel I am not on top of things and I am going to be found out and asked to leave.
Which is totally ridiculous I am sure but as I told my OH tonight when I asked him whether it would be ok if I lost this job, he told me, it was a very pessimistic view and I replied, it’s how I am actually feeling. Which I am struggling to change thought patterns, emotions etc...
I realise now, that anxiety has lived in my life for as long as I can remember. The constant churning of the stomach, the feeling I am going to be found out for saying or doing something tha5 someone else doesn’t like. The consequences ...
It’s horrible, and at the moment I am gaining no reassurance from anywhere.
The fact is I am struggling to fulfil the expectations of my new manager and I have no idea how this is going to play out. I feel a failure.
The thing is I felt a failure when I was out of work, I still feel the same in work.
Tomorrow is another day, but I wish I didn’t have this underlying anxiety, living and breathing inside me every day.As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Ps
I have learnt to live with this anxiety, and most of the time I can work through it.
This viral infection and I suspect menopausel hormones are lowering my ability to cope.
PPS
Why relevant to this diary.... tomorrow’s instalment, working, for the good of my mental health and to pay off the mounting debtAs a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
I am sorry my dear that I have no words of wisdom.
Anxiety is my constant.I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
"A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb. ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.0 -
Work and mental wellbeing.
Going back to work was really important to me.
Sometime in 2016/7 my GP observed that she did not think I would work again, this was said in a supportive way. However this rung lots of alarm bells. I was 46 with two degrees and two professional qualifications ( accountant and occupational therapist).
Hence I investigated recovery, NHS well, hmm that’s another story but let’s just say was as much help as a chocolate teapot.
However the coaching and resilience programme that we paid for, was and after reading last nights posts, I need to revisit.
So this thread records my first foray into work already.
What does work and wellbeing mean - part 2As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0
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