The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

pollyanna_26

No idea where all that white space came from under my previous post.

greenbee I'm afraid we haven't quite reached gardening weather here yet. Freezing fog last night and a heavy frost most of today. I have spent a happy time between posts with my big seed tin plotting and planning and will be starting off some seeds indoors .

I am very lucky that although in recent years i haven't had as much time for gardening i have very obliging plants. I haven't needed to sow my organic flat leaf parsley for years it just comes back each year, same with other herba and flowers. I shelter the scented geraniums and other plants in winter and they're fine it seems to have evolved in to a form of hands off gardening.

I do have a shelter belt of hollies and other evergreens planted years ago to protect plants against the strong often gale force winds coming across the Irish sea and that has helped create a sort of micro climate..

Apart from planting some veg and maybe some different flowers it will be more trimming trees and shrubs and tidying things.

The storm left a lot of leaves all over the place and I hadn't time to get out there until now.

I haven't looked at the forecast for tomorrow but that may be done then if it's warmer than today.

My mum loved Val Doonican Mrs CD I can picture him sitting in his rocking chair singing. He always looked so laid back and relaxed.

I really appreciate your kind and supportive posts. I feel as though today is the first day of the rest of my life. I can feel the muscles relaxing and tension leaving my body. After years of sleepless nights three good nights sleep in a row has made such a differnce physically and mentally.

It took me a long time to join the forum. I was a lurker and would read the posts.Everyone seemed to know everyone else and I doubted I would ever remember who was who and wondered what I could talk about.

Popperwell was the first post for me. He'd been shopping again and showed an image of a little coastal themed tray he'd bought. Living by the sea it was my kind of thing and shortly after I was signed in asking where he'd bought it. I still have that little sandwich tray and a few other items in the collection.. I've never been on Twitter but someone noticed him there a while ago merrily tweeting away with his shopping lists and all the things he'd bought.

His is one house I'd hate to have to clear out stuffed from ground floor into the loft with things he forgets he ever bought so buys again sometimes more than once.

pollyx

mothernerd

Thanks floss. I went on zoopla on Monday night (DS2 and his gf mentioned it). I haven't been in the market to buy or sell a house so had no idea, but vaguely knew they were going up so I had a pleasant surprise. My tiny terrace is worth 50% more than last time I checked. I need the numbers for probate it's just on my 'do at some point' list. Still want to clear more stuff but I have done bits of filing and am getting to the stage where I can put my hands on anything I want.

Today was oxfam run, find clothes (came to mum's on Sunday night expecting to stay a couple of nights, so just brought one set of clothes). Finally went home today and couldn't find any clothes - I did take them home. Then I remembered putting a load in the machine and setting it off just before I left. Found a dress, tunic, warm pants in the dryer.

I phoned one of my cousin's to get another cousin's number (she had given him my number but we were just missing each other). I did have his dad's number but it was in mum's address book and I've not been able to find it (on the bed at home - was using it to write to people I'd been unable to get on the phone, sitting with my ankle propped up after it 'went').

Someone had upset me yesterday. I was expecting him to be awkward but he was downright vitriolic. Phoned my brother as soon as I'd asked him to leave (I'd written down some phrases before he came and the minute he came out with them, I opened the gate and said leave now). I was shaking from the vile things he said. My niece came round later so talked it through with her - she and her boyfriend had come with large rucksacks - so another load cleared out (including all the mint chocolate chip ice cream, bought for mum).

Her sister is apparently into 'heirlooms' doesn't matter how tatty they are, so she's having the small red prayer books that were my mother's and grandmother's confirmation gifts from the Bishop. Brother also cleared up the mystery of the rings I'd found. When he asked his wife to marry him, he couldn't afford an engagement ring so my mum gave him our grandma's one. The day after his wife to be pointed at mum's (my parents were divorced by then) and said she'd rather have that one (mum may have offered him a choice of the two, I think), so the one I found is my grandma's engagement ring. Younger niece will probably end up with that as it's not her sister's style. I have eczema and dermatitis so I don't do rings. I used my grandma's wedding ring for my wedding ceremony and handed it back to mum afterwards. 

This morning I was still bothered by yesterday's confrontation (I don't think that man deserves any headspace so it was annoying me) so my cousin talked me down - they knew that everything he said was utter nonsense. Her lovely husband said, just point him out to me, I'll sort him out.

Then the cousin who'd been trying to phone me called as I was getting out of the taxi and we talked for about 2 hours (DS3 was keeping score - he said he didn't know I could talk so much). He said that when he tried to tell his children how our parent lived they didn't believe him. I said my dad had insisted that we each had our own beds - he had to share with his two older brothers and usually ended up on the floor.

Then I started to tell him about his parents wedding night. Grandma and grandad gave up their bed for the young couple's first night. In the middle of the night grandad went to the toilet and having been celebrating in the afternoon and evening, went back to his own bed and my auntie was pushing him out and yelling at him. His dad had told him the story.

I did the Oxfam run, called in a shop to buy a big roll of labels (for labelling bin bagged donations), picked up a couple of 50p sandwiches in boots and bought all the remaining 50p chocolate brownies (meant to leave some for DS3 and beloved - oops) and looked at eye creams - the skin around my eyes is dry and painful and I know I had a B00ts one years ago. Found a reasonably priced one - I don't want miracles, just to be comfortable. I've also brought my little reading lamp back.

Asked the taxi firm if the driver would take me to the after funeral venue and wait whilst I paid them and then bring me back to the bungalow. Didn't bother paying as the place was packed to the rafters - will try midweek, early. Locked up, added the clothes I had on to the pile in the machine and set it off, had a shower, put my clean jumper back on, eaten a sandwich and a couple of bits and set up my lamp, watched an episode of only connect and am going to relax and start again tomorrow (may have Sunday dinner if I can get organised). Think I'm going to use the same hymns as for my brother's funeral, it would simplify things (especially if one of the boys can scan in the order of service and make minor alterations). Time to switch off and read, I think.

MrsCD

Oooohhh!!! 
I've just discovered Winter Walks on iplayer. If you want a nice calm walk from the comfort of your home this is it. If you don't want to listen then turn the sound off....

pollyanna_26

MrsCD said:

Oooohhh!!! 
I've just discovered Winter Walks on iplayer. If you want a nice calm walk from the comfort of your home this is it. If you don't want to listen then turn the sound off....

I started watching that a few weeks ago starting with the Yorkshire Shepherdess. Such a lovely change from all the news reports.

I felt as though I was having a day out far from the madding crowd. I can recommend it. I left the sound on as she was seeing people along the way and exchanging a little chat.

pollyx

Floss

There's another series called "Walking with..." too, all on iplayer 

pollyanna_26

I was watching Winter Walks on BBC2 before it went to iplayer. I'll have a look for Walking with. Thanks for the heads up Floss. It's just nice to see nice places and some normal.

pollyx

burtha

wow .
hi .  1st thing is sending hugs to anyone that wants one . haven't been on here since the flapjack post,as life's a bit full on . 

mothernurd / polly   you both sound amazing considering all that's going on x 

I made a batch of flapjacks using a googled recipe,  turned out as hard as a hammer .  half of it I smashed up to be used as granola,  the rest was OK if it was soaked in custard lol .. so I'll give your recipe a try ASAP mona .

I've now got 3 grandkids 3 times a week as soon as I finish work . its fun but hard work lol , plus adding in dd2 as she's not back at uni yet   but is stressing with uni assessments deadlines and life in general.   
so today was spent looking at uni accommodation for her 2nd year and youngest ds for Aug start . 
then a full food shop,  everything is expensive atm. 
did managed to fit in a 3 mile walk and a 6 mile run today , .. the sky was fabulous.  

now I'm waiting so i can do taxi duties for dd2 , hopefully not to late . 
tomorrow I've got dd1 plus 3 grandkids here for lunch ,plus dd2 and ds2 .  
should be fun 
night all x 

pollyanna_26

burtha said:

wow .
hi .  1st thing is sending hugs to anyone that wants one . haven't been on here since the flapjack post,as life's a bit full on . 

mothernurd / polly   you both sound amazing considering all that's going on x 

I made a batch of flapjacks using a googled recipe,  turned out as hard as a hammer .  half of it I smashed up to be used as granola,  the rest was OK if it was soaked in custard lol .. so I'll give your recipe a try ASAP mona .

I've now got 3 grandkids 3 times a week as soon as I finish work . its fun but hard work lol , plus adding in dd2 as she's not back at uni yet   but is stressing with uni assessments deadlines and life in general.   
so today was spent looking at uni accommodation for her 2nd year and youngest ds for Aug start . 
then a full food shop,  everything is expensive atm. 
did managed to fit in a 3 mile walk and a 6 mile run today , .. the sky was fabulous.  

now I'm waiting so i can do taxi duties for dd2 , hopefully not to late . 
tomorrow I've got dd1 plus 3 grandkids here for lunch ,plus dd2 and ds2 .  
should be fun 
night all x 

When you are telling people they are amazing burtha please take a look at how amazing you are. I honestly don't know how you keep all those balls in the air and do your absolute best for every member of your family while working and having your own health problem- I hope that tumour is sleeping and not troubling you.

Just getting dd2 into uni is a big result and I hope she can get through her 2nd year taking each day as it comes and managing her anxiety..Now it will be your youngest son setting out on the big uni adventure.

Honestly burtha the dreadful way 3MW deserted you all and left you in an unheated falling apart house followed by playing mind games with yourself and his children would never have pointed towards such a positive outcome for you and your loved ones.

I uased to worry about you as you chopped the wood to try to get some heat into the room.

You're still pushing yourself taking on child care while working a very stressful job during the pandemic. I hope you have a special Paddington hard stare for any abusive customers at the Pharmacy.

I know you're still running and walking and you have your Frog back but make an effort to look after yourself as well as everyone else

Love pollyx

pollyanna_26

mothernerd I keep meaning to ask if you still have problems with your back,neck and spine. For a number of years youngest and I had big ,firm VShaped pillows from JL. They helped a lot but were so big we'd often find ourselves sliding down onto the mattress . JL stopped selling them so we tried softer smaller ones from Argos . They weren't bad but not very suppotive.

A while back as everything flared I decided to have a search for another one. Lots on the big river site but the one that seemed best had a wipable plastic coating . I'm not a fan of plastic anyway but also thought it might get too hot.and uncomfortable.

Eventually I found a much smaller one a couple of months ago and it's been perfect. I always have two pillows and I have it over them. it has a lovely washable fleecy cover and never moves around during the night. It was also nice and cosy when my boiler was damaged.

What made me think of you was reading comments from some reviews by people using cpap machines during the night saying they found the pillow ideal.

It's the Teddy Bear Fleece Medium V shape pillow we have though there is at least one different siize.. I can't remember the exact price but two including very quick delivery came to a few pounds under £50

I'm not sure if they are available elsewhere but that one came up at M&S.

pollyx

Checked and the pillows are £19.50 each so less than I thought. I paid postage but there is the free click and collect option.

Some stores stock them but not ours andI I'm limiting going to town.

mothernerd

Thanks polly, Beloved has the V shaped pillows so maybe I'll try one before I buy. I make a heap of pillows - until last week I had the heavy wool cover rolled up into a bolster behind them. I sleep sort of half sitting up - not so much slope that I slide down in the night but not a square so that my head flops back on the flat bit. If I'm snotty or in hayfever season, stuff comes out of my nose instead of down the back of my throat and into my lungs. I like firm pillows but sometimes a mixture of hard and soft works better and occasionally my head falls forward so I end up in a tucking his tiny head under his wing position with drool all across my face or in my ear.

Had a therapeutic but not very productive day. Wrote to tell one of my dead brother's former gf about mum - we're talking gf forty years ago but mum kept in touch. Well I've written 25 pages but it helped get my head clear. Bacon and beans again (and taken out more bacon and sausages). I had defrosted a pack of peppered mackerel (part of the Christmas supplies) and some wraps but just didn't fancy them.

Then watched Foyles War and sorted more photos. I gave my niece the box they were standing in to protect an egg shaped lamp she was taking (wrapped it in an old towel for my brother's dog and part of a fleece throw (mum cut them up to make covers for the tops of sideboards) and the box was just big enough to fit the lamp in and tuck all the nesting material in around it. Was worried about the mostly sorted photos falling off and skidding across the floor so have packed them all in a large carrier bag, labelled and in their own bags or plastic pockets. They might be breeding - keep finding odd ones I've never seen and missing some that have 'always' been there - we went on a holiday in Blackpool with some of our cousins one year and I'm sure we had a photo of us in a row waiting to cross the road- one of those islands half way across the road that we didn't have around here until many years later.

Any ideas on what to do about a couple (both deceased, him before I was ten, probably earlier, her when I was a teenager) who didn't have children. They were friends of my grandma. Wondering if the archives would like it as she was on the committee for the 'friends of the local hospital group'. I know his name but I only remember seeing him once before he died. Is it disrespectful to quietly bin them. there's a few baby pictures that I can't work out who they are and I'm sure 'Luke in his Christening robes' would be happy if that photo never saw the light of day.