The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

karcher

:wave:

Hope you are all ok

I've not had a good week to say the least, but just wanted to pop in and say hello all x

burtha

Karcher, hope your ok and next week is better

Good night tonight , 4 pubs 4 lrg diet cokes , sitting people watching was fun , so out of my comfort zone , but needs must , need to have fun ... with good friends ...looking forward and planning the next one

Youngest kids spent quality time with the older siblings tonight , think if nothing else positive has come out of this , it's the kids have all pulled together ... proud of them .
This afternoon me , 3 kids and a dgc , at the local national trust place ... Didn't do much , but had fun .

I know we have a long way to go , but even talking with dd tonight her comments said it all .... "dad is posting of fb a lot , when he has us .... dad of the year .... so not true " ... so sad , but she can now see through him , his loss .
Hopefully she will see and trust that nothing else will change soon , family is stronger than before .

Tomorrows plans .... run ... ds first football match of the season ... then whatever kids want to do ....

and where is the ex .... guess what , he's on another weekend away ..... may as well get him a extra large shovel now

x

Ps , no dancing on tables took part tonight .... but did hear a few good chat up lines ..... :rotfl:

monnagran

Hi burtha, you are obviously revved up on your 4 glasses of diet coke. So glad that you had a good and nicely silly evening. It's a shame that the kids are having their eyes opened in such a tragic way. One day pratface will realise what he has lost but it will be too late then.
Your older kids sound like wonderful people. The younger ones won't go far wrong if they have siblings who step up to the mark like yours have been doing. It looks as though you have a tight family unit there and a tight family unit is invincible.

You'd better get some sleep now or you will be fit for nothing tomorrow.

I think it sounds quite suspicious that Pface has to keep taking his latest victim away at weekends. Perhaps home is not such a good place to be just now. Nice.

maryc1000

hi im sorry if this is wrong place to put this but im confused and tired and now very worried, my head has been spinning for a while now.

i have debts and i will face what I need to but at the moment im just tying to stabilize my life, ive got some problems.

I have debt collector for tax and tax fines and other debts too, looking for me, im not at the address i was at when i got them all, so they are looking for me, i had to go to the hospital tonight as i was scared I was having a heart problem and i gave my real name and my real date of birth, and a friend's home phone number where i go aften, not my real address though, but im worried that somehow the debt collector agencies, or the tax office, will have access somehow to the nhs database and be alerted to the place i went to the hospital and then they have the landline phone number, after that it wouldnt be too hard to find me i think.

is this a reasonable fear or am I being stupid? i havent been able to relax since i gave them my name but i really needed to see a dr.

sorry if this is stupid but im really worried now. being in debt is horrible.

monnagran

OK. Stop stressing NOW.
There are government agencies who can help sort out the mess you are in. I've not experienced this myself but there are people on here who have come back from overwhelming debt and built successful lives.
There is nothing you can do at the moment and I don't think that the debt collectors work in the middle of the night.
You can ring the Samaritans 24 hours a day, and at least talk things over. Tomorrow you can set about finding the best place to go for help and by then someone on here will probably have pointed you in the right direction.
Try to relax for the moment, you will get through this. Promise.

monnagran

Sorry, I should have given you the Samitans number.

It is 116 123 and the calls are free from any phone. As I said, you can call at any time, day or night. You are never alone.

maryc1000

thank you for your help, i dont need the samaritans though but thank you, I will be able to deal with what I need to do in a while, but not right now i just cant do it right now, i just need some time to sort some things out first but now i am really concerned about if what i have done will give up some sort of alert from the nhs database with my name and my date of birth, and the debt collectors will be all over me, im really just looking to hear if someone knows if this is a reasonable thing to fear?

FairyPrincessk

Morning all,

MaryC, I don't know much about debt counselling, but you are definitely eligible for some and others will be along shortly who can help with that. The NHS will not be allowed to give out your information to debt collectors so you can rest easy on that one. That said, it will be easier in the long run the sooner you can start to get things sorted. Stick with this site, there are many who have gone before you and are now thriving and they'll all help you get through this too.x

Nursemaggie, I can't wait to hear about your walks--it would be so lovely if you not only had more space but better access to fresh air and a shorter commute for your DS.

Burtha, I'm so glad you had a nice evening. I suspect your DD will start to improve as she continues to suss out the situation. It sound as if she now has her father's card marked and now that she knows where to turn for stability it may help. Keep up the awesome mothering and keep looking after yourself.

Our walk was a bit of a disaster yesterday--we never actually found the walk and did a lot of scrambling through heather in search of non-existent paths. OH got bitten by something while we ate our lunch and I forgot my hat and used OH's with the smaller brim and got a touch of sun. Still, it was nice, good exercise and nice views. We decided to have our meal out last night so we can ensure an early night tonight so OH is making pizza for tea. Off to do a couple of chores and then the gym before a quiet afternoon.

CRANKY40

Hello all, I've had the most awful 10 days in a long time which is why I've been absent from posting. I had to have a heart monitor for a week and was allergic to the hyper allergenic gel that they fix the pads on with - I did look like someone had painted a bullseye on my front but it's starting to fade now thank goodness :rotfl:

Then we had a visitor......he stayed with his sister but spent some time with us and his family together. I do a lot for his sister - decorating, shopping, gardening, taking to hospital appointments etc but when he wanted to spend a day with us in the city she threw a horrendous tantrum. I can only imagine he stood up to her because they had a row (the details of which I'm not party to) and he went home. He's not speaking to anyone and she's not speaking to me. My sister and my good friend both say she's ungrateful and selfish and he's a wimp but it's been very upsetting for me and also for the house troll who wasn't happy to see me in tears over the whole thing

Anyway, onwards and upwards and titus out as Monna's tablet would say :rotfl: Today was supposed to be last sailing race for the house troll followed by a BBQ but the weather doesn't look suitably friendly for either.

NM another one here excited at the possibility that you may have the chance of moving somewhere bigger than the average garden shed.

Karcher Have a hug and if you need an ear please pm me. I have plenty of time as none of my online gaming people (who were real life friends too but I spent time with them game playing of an evening) are currently speaking to me or each other

Thank goodness for the good people, both in real life and the ones that live in my computer. Take care all of you

Nargleblast

MaryC1000 as you can see, this thread is a friendly and supportive one, and you're welcome to join in with us. For your specific financial problems, there is the Debt Free Wannabe forum where you can post a new thread asking for help in sorting out your situation, and you will receive lots of advice there. I would start by listing all your monthly income, then all your monthly bills including food. Then, look to see if there is any surplus left over for paying off debts. Your housing, heating and food costs are a priority, debt repayments are not. Having got those figures, get online to a debt management organisation like Stepchange, or Payplan. You will be able to get some idea of the best way to tackle your debts. It may be a debt management plan, an IVA, bankruptcy, debt relief order, whatever. The company will advise the most suitable option for your situation. It will be tough, but anything is better than living in fear. The Old Style forum is a great resource for living economically, and making a good life, whilst the Debt Free Wannabe mob will motivate and support you on your journey to debt freedom.

Good luck, and keep us posted as to how you get on.