Would a female feel vulnerable if alone ans stranded?

Huskydays

When I was 18 or so I was stranded by Tesco Breakdown Cover (Green Flag in disguise at the time) for several hours on the a14. Eventually it turned out that Green Flag's chosen local contractor did not check their fax machine. I felt frustrated but not vulnerable. Perhaps if I was in a different area I might have been more cautious but not because of my gender.

On a (slightly) related note: I was surprised the other day to find that Premiere Inn won't put lone females on the ground floor or at the ends of corridors as standard. It must be a relatively common concern for them to introduce this as policy and put it in their FAQs but not one I can personally identify with.

davidwood123 wrote: »

Your sex has no influence on the service you receive.

I'm going to have this quote laminated so I can give copies to the next tradesman who refuses to quote until he has spoken to "my husband" :rotfl:

Rosemary7391

Huskydays wrote: »

When I was 18 or so I was stranded by Tesco Breakdown Cover (Green Flag in disguise at the time) for several hours on the a14. Eventually it turned out that Green Flag's chosen local contractor did not check their fax machine. I felt frustrated but not vulnerable. Perhaps if I was in a different area I might have been more cautious but not because of my gender.

On a (slightly) related note: I was surprised the other day to find that Premiere Inn won't put lone females on the ground floor or at the ends of corridors as standard. It must be a relatively common concern for them to introduce this as policy and put it in their FAQs but not one I can personally identify with.



I'm going to have this quote laminated so I can give copies to the next tradesman who refuses to quote until he has spoken to "my husband" :rotfl:

I just checked the Premier Inn website - they say they'll do that where possible. As a frequent lone female traveller I'd be most put out if I couldn't stay somewhere because they'd run out of "safe" rooms for me to have! I'd actually prefer to be at the end of a corridor, away from the noise of passing folk...

Re your last point - does that seriously happen nowadays? I've never had any trouble with tradesmen although I've only had a few in.

Huskydays

Rosemary7391 wrote: »

I just checked the Premier Inn website - they say they'll do that where possible. As a frequent lone female traveller I'd be most put out if I couldn't stay somewhere because they'd run out of "safe" rooms for me to have! I'd actually prefer to be at the end of a corridor, away from the noise of passing folk...

Re your last point - does that seriously happen nowadays? I've never had any trouble with tradesmen although I've only had a few in.

Oops - I meant to say 'where possible' in my earlier post, bit misleading now I read it back. I thought it was an odd choice to be taken out of my hands without consultation. Especially as a vaper (I hate that word, read: quitting smoker) a ground floor room would be very convenient.

Yes, definitely not a regular occurrence but unfortunately happened twice last year - perhaps I was just very unlucky? I had just bought my house and planned a lot of work which having rented until now is all new to me. The first (new boiler) came round, measured, had a cup of tea, etc. As he was leaving I asked when to expect the quotes and he said I should have my husband ring him tomorrow to discuss it, I laughed and he repeated himself. Second was a sparky who would not even LOOK at what I wanted doing without talking to "the man of the house".
Needless to say, my imaginary husband did not follow either of those up.

thepurplepixie

Fireflyaway wrote: »

As a female I may feel vulnerable depending if its day or night and where I was etc. I'd be worried about opportunists. Sexual predators to be clear. However I may feel vulnerable if I were a man. Although less likely to be sexually assaulted, you could be robbed or beaten up. There are weirdos out there.
When I did break down once it was in a rural location and it was dark. I called the breakdown people but also called my dad so I wasn't on my own. The car couldn't be moved and there was no pavement. I lost count of how many passing motorists tooted or stuck up 2 fingers whilst I was waiting for recovery. Doesn't take much for people to get uptight and lose compassion.

I broke down recently outside work. A colleague moved her car and I got the jump leads out. We weren't in anyone's way, we weren't doing anything weird but we got abuse. A nice postman stopped to ask if we needed help but we were managing fine.

I've broken down 3 more times in 40 odd years of driving, one in a car park and I got shirty with rescue service as I had MIL in the car and she had terminal cancer so I wasn't impressed at waiting for hours. Once near a hotel where I had been attending a course, the RAC loaded my car up and drove me home. The last one was in a country lane and I got towed and that was an experience down narrow country lanes. I suppose I got irritated with the wait with two of them and I did want consideration for having a dying person (not relevant that it was a woman) in the car. I can honestly say I didn't feel vulnerable at all.

Rosemary7391

Huskydays wrote: »

Oops - I meant to say 'where possible' in my earlier post, bit misleading now I read it back. I thought it was an odd choice to be taken out of my hands without consultation. Especially as a vaper (I hate that word, read: quitting smoker) a ground floor room would be very convenient.

Yes, definitely not a regular occurrence but unfortunately happened twice last year - perhaps I was just very unlucky? I had just bought my house and planned a lot of work which having rented until now is all new to me. The first (new boiler) came round, measured, had a cup of tea, etc. As he was leaving I asked when to expect the quotes and he said I should have my husband ring him tomorrow to discuss it, I laughed and he repeated himself. Second was a sparky who would not even LOOK at what I wanted doing without talking to "the man of the house".
Needless to say, my imaginary husband did not follow either of those up.

Wow... I've had an electrician, plasterer, 2 locksmiths and a carpenter around and not had any problems. I think you were pretty unlucky! My imaginary husband would not have followed either of those up either, but his imaginary wife might've had something to say about it!

Actually I just had an email from the insurance company addressed to "Mr Rosemary7391" - but I'm pretty sure that's just a typo :rotfl:

Doody

Laz123 wrote: »

... But it seems most people here are of the younger generation and even though the breakdown companies give priority to stranded females almost everyone seems to think it doesn't matter. Whereas with my generation it does matter.

How do you assess people's ages here? I suspect I'm around your age. Priority should go to the vulnerable: people with small children and people compromised in health as in the example from another person of being with their terminally ill mother.

I hate the whole ladies first concept. When going through doors I will automatically let a person carrying a burden through first, or someone with a mobility difficulty. IMHO it is more important to assess people and their needs as individuals, not by gender.

Doody

Bean83 wrote: »

Slightly off-topic, but are you serious?! If so, PLEASE don't do this!!

1) it's illegal (hard shoulder is for emergencies only and you could be obstructing the emergency services)
2) it's extremely dangerous - people on the hard shoulder get crashed into all the time!!

If you're that tired, find a service station and pull over there, the hard shoulder is no place for a nap!

Thanks for the advice.

ps, It was an A road, not a motorway.

thepurplepixie

Laz123 wrote: »

Now now, let's not be nasty. I asked the question because as already stated earlier and linked to another thread, which you obviously haven't bothered to read, I jumped to the defence of a female who had broken down, waited hours and hours for the AA alone and feeling vulnerable and she was jumped on by a few misogynistic macho petrolheads stating why bring in the gender equation. Now being from the old school I couldn't understand why? Hence the question. But it seems most people here are of the younger generation and eventhough the breakdown companies give priority to stranded females almost everyone seems to think it doesn't matter. Whereas with my generation it does matter.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5667260

Was I a good psychologist? In the 20+ plus years of practise and out of the 100s of clients I assisted with their malaise to give a better quality of life I never had a complaint. And out of all the posters you were the only one to have had a paranoid/suspicious viewpoint.

Don't know what generation other posters belong to but I'm a pensioner.

Huskydays

Rosemary7391 wrote: »

Wow... I've had an electrician, plasterer, 2 locksmiths and a carpenter around and not had any problems. I think you were pretty unlucky! My imaginary husband would not have followed either of those up either, but his imaginary wife might've had something to say about it!

Actually I just had an email from the insurance company addressed to "Mr Rosemary7391" - but I'm pretty sure that's just a typo :rotfl:

Haha, his imaginary wife was too gobsmacked at the time. Although, as is always the case with hindsight, I know no exactly what I'd say if happens again (not forum friendly). I'll be looking for a roofer later in the year so we'll see if the bad luck holds out or not.

SueC_2

littlegreenparrot wrote: »

I'm a women and have broken down several times over the years on busy roads and have never felt especially vulnerable.

On every occasion several guys have stopped to ask if I was ok, and if someone was coming to help me. Someone has helped move the car away from the middle of a roundabout so it less of a danger.
They have always been perfectly lovely, have asked politely, and when told I'm being rescued have just said that was great and left me to it.
I have a very clear memory of thanking one chap who specifically said 'that's ok love, I'd want someone to check on my daughter if she was in your position'

I'm not naive, I know some people are awful. But driving in itself is quite a dangerous pastime, most people just want to check your ok. I'm no more or less vulnerable than when I do anything else.

I have particularly fond memories of one 'rescuer' many years ago, who went to great lengths to help me, whilst staying right away from me on the other side of the road and behind his own car - shouting reassuring comments, offering advice and volunteering to go and make phone calls for me etc. Personally I hadn't felt threatened in the slightest, but was bowled over by his consideration.