How long before you move in together

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  • svain
    svain Posts: 516 Forumite
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    Oakdene wrote: »
    Feeling pretty broken, although I did ask her to leave last night I woke thinking maybe there was a compromise that we could reach to move this forward but the way she tried to use her daughter & the bits on social media I think have confirmed you guys are right. Thank you all

    Hang in there mate, stick to your guns. At least for a while
  • Oakdene
    Oakdene Posts: 2,560 Forumite
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    svain wrote: »
    Hang in there mate, stick to your guns. At least for a while

    Cheers, going to take a bit of time and re-focus my energy on the kids. Forgot to add that she had set a date & put a deposit down on our wedding (despite the fact we are not engaged).
    Dwy galon, un dyhead,
    Dwy dafod ond un iaith,
    Dwy raff yn cydio’n ddolen,
    Dau enaid ond un taith.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    Oakdene wrote: »
    Forgot to add that she had set a date & put a deposit down on our wedding (despite the fact we are not engaged).

    Wow! You've had a lucky escape.
  • Malthusian
    Malthusian Posts: 10,954 Forumite
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    justme111 wrote: »
    He has given that information which I pointed to in my first reply. He said she was pushing for it and would not be happy that he was not ready.

    No, one doesn't quite amount to the other. At that point it was equally possible that 1) OH was a bunny boiler 2) OP was a ditherer or a commitmentphobe. Post #23 removed all doubt as to which it was.

    FWIW I don't agree that 11 months is a short time together in general terms. But I agree that it makes sense to leave longer than that when there are kids involved who would also have to cope with living together.
  • Red-Squirrel_2
    Red-Squirrel_2 Posts: 4,341 Forumite
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    Oakdene wrote: »
    Cheers, going to take a bit of time and re-focus my energy on the kids. Forgot to add that she had set a date & put a deposit down on our wedding (despite the fact we are not engaged).

    Did she tell you that? I'd take that with a pinch of salt, did she have money to throw away? Or are you in fact Brad Pitt on the rebound from Angelina? ;)
  • Oakdene
    Oakdene Posts: 2,560 Forumite
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    Red-Squirrel wrote: »
    Did she tell you that? I'd take that with a pinch of salt, did she have money to throw away? Or are you in fact Brad Pitt on the rebound from Angelina? ;)

    She booked it & showed me the confirmation email from the venue.
    Dwy galon, un dyhead,
    Dwy dafod ond un iaith,
    Dwy raff yn cydio’n ddolen,
    Dau enaid ond un taith.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    Oakdene wrote: »
    She booked it & showed me the confirmation email from the venue.

    What did you say?
  • Oakdene
    Oakdene Posts: 2,560 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    What did you say?

    I saw it was a bit of a shock!!
    Dwy galon, un dyhead,
    Dwy dafod ond un iaith,
    Dwy raff yn cydio’n ddolen,
    Dau enaid ond un taith.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    Oakdene wrote: »
    I saw it was a bit of a shock!!

    But you didn't call her out on booking your wedding?
  • Oakdene
    Oakdene Posts: 2,560 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    But you didn't call her out on booking your wedding?

    I told her I wasnt happy that we werent even engaged & also the fact that I hadnt even been consulted
    Dwy galon, un dyhead,
    Dwy dafod ond un iaith,
    Dwy raff yn cydio’n ddolen,
    Dau enaid ond un taith.
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