When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

Eager_Elephant

Hiddenidenity wrote: »

I think a lot of my MH issues come from the issues from home. I don't like me. I don't like who I am, what I am, what I look like, what I choose to do. I wish I could be anything but me because anything has to be better than what 'I' am.

I'm with edf. I'm going to call as soon as the kids are in school I've just looked at my annual statement and it's £2.10 a week on standing charge. £17 debt repayment and average usage £7.11 a week! Gas £1.90 standing charge. £17 debt and average usage £5.47 a week! Over the last 12 months.

The rent arrears are huge! I'm terrified to find out just how much they are when I call

I could give loads of mental health advice but as you have counselling coming up I won't as they will talk through everything and give you strategies to cope day to day.

It's so sad to see that you don't like yourself when actually you are a fabulous lady with many good qualities and you look after the house and children really well (without much support from your husband) and I think you are being really positive on this diary:T:A

EDF have an Energy Trust - you can either apply yourself or your Debt Advisor can do it for you. It might be worth googling EDF Energy Trust and getting an idea of what its about before you go for your appointment. Do you know what the actual arrears are with EDF?
The forms are quite easy although they look long, the main thing is that your budget must balance otherwise that is an automatic refusal. Also you need to send in proof of income with the form - if you wait until they request it this can delay things by 8 weeks.
The other thing to bare in mind is that they ask how you got into debt with gas and electric so start thinking about this including your DD being poorly, your DH being off sick from work etc.
Now is the right time of year to apply as the fund has been 'topped up' for the new financial year so there is loads of money available at the moment.

Hiddenidenity

Toni'sfriend wrote: »

Looking much better. Still a couple of things to catch up on. TV licence £10 and Council tax £64 (ignoring mum for the moment - these are more important) Are you going to contact gas and electricity?

I am going to call them next and see what they say.

Yeah as horrible as it sounds mum isn't my biggest priority. She can't make me homeless the other things can. I need to remember this when I'm worrying about her.

Thank you for still replying and not getting fed up of my rambling

Hiddenidenity

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

I could give loads of mental health advice but as you have counselling coming up I won't as they will talk through everything and give you strategies to cope day to day.

It's so sad to see that you don't like yourself when actually you are a fabulous lady with many good qualities and you look after the house and children really well (without much support from your husband) and I think you are being really positive on this diary:T:A

EDF have an Energy Trust - you can either apply yourself or your Debt Advisor can do it for you. It might be worth googling EDF Energy Trust and getting an idea of what its about before you go for your appointment. Do you know what the actual arrears are with EDF?
The forms are quite easy although they look long, the main thing is that your budget must balance otherwise that is an automatic refusal. Also you need to send in proof of income with the form - if you wait until they request it this can delay things by 8 weeks.

The other thing to bare in mind is that they ask how you got into debt with gas and electric so start thinking about this including your DD being poorly, your DH being off sick from work etc.
Now is the right time of year to apply as the fund has been 'topped up' for the new financial year so there is loads of money available at the moment.

Thank you so much EE you've been so helpful.

I will ask how much the arrears are when I call (my phones just charging) I know they are very high. We where on monthly direct debit for around 8 years and never paid enough. Some months went unpaid etc etc. We only went back onto the prepayment in march when they 'forced' us too.

Will look at the EDF trust now. I wouldn't have even knew these things existed so thank you again x

Hiddenidenity

GeorgianaCavendish wrote: »

Morning Hidden! I'm really glad your OH has seen the light, I think the shock of seeing the financial situation in black and white is a really big wake up call (it certainly was for me!)

It sounds like a sensible idea to cancel birthday plans for now, no reason why you can't do something to make up for this frugal birthday once all the debts have been paid off.

Good luck with the utility companies and the debt advisor appointment!

Opps I missed your reply sorry x

It really did, I think he might just be realising I'm actually serious this time? X

charlies_tribe

Good morning Hidden, glad things are looking a bit better today.

I know its not the best way, but once your up to date on everything, i'm wondering if you kept on top of everything with what you should be paying (minimum payments)and then any extra to pay off your mum first. I was just wondering if you would feel better in yourself if you didn't owe anything to her that she could keep using against you.

Good luck with the energy company, an extra £30 a week would go a long way.

Toni'sfriend

I agree with EE you are an amazing person. Look how far you've come in this short time. Hopefully with OH's help you'll achieve even more. Your obviously a terrific mother in spite of your present difficulties.
That's great advice about EDF as well. If you know what you need it's half the battle.
And you're not rambling and I'm not getting fed up reading your posts. I rejoice at every little victory.

Hiddenidenity

EDF are sending full breakdown of debt in the post because there's several parts.

They will also send a form to ask for the weekly repayment to be lowered and for the energy trust.

Thank you for all the advice about this as I'd have never even thought to ask! X

Thank you Charlies Tribe. I think paying mum does play on my mind a lot even though I know she shouldn't be a priority really x

Toni'sfriend

That's good. You know is takes a lot to pluck up the courage to make all these phone calls, etc. Well done. You should be proud of yourself making this massive effort to sort out a very difficult situation,

Hiddenidenity

Completed the forms online and uploaded wage sljps/tax credit award etc so hopefully that helps things along

Also requested for the repayment amount to be reduced online too.

Hiddenidenity

Toni'sfriend wrote: »

That's good. You know is takes a lot to pluck up the courage to make all these phone calls, etc. Well done. You should be proud of yourself making this massive effort to sort out a very difficult situation,

I cant quite believe I've done it. I never use the phone not even to call OH etc. So why I'm up for trying I wanted to get everything done, I know there will be days I feel like I can't so I need to grab when I can and not waste that time x

Actually doing it and feeling like I know where we stand now than just guessing has helped a lot too.