Short relationship ended

catoutthebag

hazyjo wrote: »

Sorry to hear that. Try not to mull over things. Some just don't work out and there is no point in over-thinking it or trying to make sense of it.

I wasn't particularly lucky in love, married twice, but have been with my BF now for 5 years or so.

Onwards and upwards. Don't give up!

A supportive, sane comment, rather than the bitter, angry poster's, who sounded so happy with their negative lives.

Thank you for those words.

Pollycat

I remember your other threads in which you acknowledge that you have issues with 'insecurity, paranoia & jealousy' among other things.
One poster has mentioned 'over-thinking' - I think this is what you do.

Perhaps you could work on trying to sort yourself out before rushing into another relationship.

Until/unless you do, you might meet 'the one' but spoil it through the way you (subconsciously) treat them.
I'm not saying you're the one at fault but some of those things you've posted do come across as superior and critical of this girl.

I'm sorry your relationship didn't work out, it was clear that you were very keen on this girl.

fierystormcloud

catoutthebag wrote: »

Hi, no she wasn't. I trust her on that level. We spent every weekend together, and she was at work, parents etc during the week.

Not sure it's necessary to ask such as stupid question, you may be bored, schools start next week.

Thanks

Again with the 'it's the school holidays' old chestnut!

Why do people always assume it's 'schoolchildren' who troll websites or write (supposedly) ludicrous posts?! It's not. Why would schoolchildren register with moneysavingexpert to troll the forums FGS?

The people in question are economically inactive adults (mostly in their 30's, 40's, 50's, and 60's,) with too much time on their hands. It's not 'schoolchildren.'

Re your OP, I agree with the majority here that the girl in question who you were dating, had a lucky escape. From what you have written (here AND in the other thread that was quoted,) you sound possessive and controlling. And calling people bitter and angry and nasty for telling you a few home truths, says a lot more about you frankly.

KRB2725

From the way you post I would say that you are possibly/probably a bit too intense when you meet someone.

I would try and go on a couple of dates and just relax and have fun, enjoy the moment rather than trying to work out if you think it could turn into something long term right from the outset.

LilElvis

arbrighton wrote: »

Perhaps by, as people have suggested on your many previous threads, working on your self esteem, trust issues and crowding people early days as you have described

I would add to this that you should look at how rude, defensive and aggressive you can be when others disagree with you. Your replies on threads typically show this to be your default response - and its not nice. If this exhibits in RL too it would be a serious turn-off to many prospective partners.

catoutthebag

emmatthews wrote: »

From the way you post I would say that you are possibly/probably a bit too intense when you meet someone.

I would try and go on a couple of dates and just relax and have fun, enjoy the moment rather than trying to work out if you think it could turn into something long term right from the outset.

If anything, she was more keen and intense. Very confident and proactive about staying over, taking to the next level, introduced me to her mum after a few weeks, her friends etc. I waited 2+ months for that. So i disagree with your assertion

catoutthebag

Pollycat wrote: »

I remember your other threads in which you acknowledge that you have issues with 'insecurity, paranoia & jealousy' among other things.
One poster has mentioned 'over-thinking' - I think this is what you do.

Perhaps you could work on trying to sort yourself out before rushing into another relationship.

Until/unless you do, you might meet 'the one' but spoil it through the way you (subconsciously) treat them.
I'm not saying you're the one at fault but some of those things you've posted do come across as superior and critical of this girl.

I'm sorry your relationship didn't work out, it was clear that you were very keen on this girl.

Agree i over think.
Disagree i was critical towards her. She remarked how loving, caring and kind i was with her, that's how I am when with someone.
Sure, i can be a bit insecure or paranoid, doesn't mean everyone is perfect. I acknowledge my weakness. But never did i not trust her
Never did i stop her seeing friends, family, and i never would

catoutthebag

LilElvis wrote: »

I would add to this that you should look at how rude, defensive and aggressive you can be when others disagree with you. Your replies on threads typically show this to be your default response - and its not nice. If this exhibits in RL too it would be a serious turn-off to many prospective partners.

Not like that with her or friends. Just trolls

LilElvis

catoutthebag wrote: »

Not like that with her or friends. Just trolls

You just can't help yourself can you?

Perhaps trolls, and others, can see what you don't see yourself.

arbrighton

catoutthebag wrote: »

Firstly, forgave was the wrong word. I didn't say 'i forgive you for your past'.
She told me, i said we all make mistakes, and it was never mentioned by me or her again.
What i meant was, i didn't let it affect me and her and 'let go' of that information, rather than use it against her or to end it.
Clearer?

But you haven't, clearly, as you're making such a song and dance about it here.

And no, i'm not robotic or wooden about relationships. I suspect you were looking in the mirror when you said that. FYI I don't think it's me that's lacking here as I'm happily married and have been with OH over 12 years now.... And Have NEVER FELT THE NEED to actually know every detail of his life before me