Inheritance

HeavyMetalFan

SuzieSue wrote: »

They always do. As soon as anyone asks about inheritance they all crawl out of the woodwork thinking the worst of the person asking.

There is another recent thread where someone is concerned about their parents' financial attitude and the same people have already started asking if the OP is more worried about themselves.

Just ignore them. They are all bitter and twisted and can't give people the benefit of the doubt. You should feel sorry for them.

Yes. I saw that thread and thought they exact same thing to be honest.

Pollycat

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

My relationship with my Mother.
Mother's financial situation.
Mother going into a care home.
My entire personality just because part of me would like a share of £128,000 that someone didn't need. (She told my that by accident last week btw. I did not ask).

I've re-read all my posts and I've not made any assumptions.

The money - regardless of how much or how little is involved - was left to your Mother, not you and if the people bequeathing it wanted you to have a share, you would have been included in the will.

HeavyMetalFan

Pollycat wrote: »

I've re-read all my posts and I've not made any assumptions.

The money - regardless of how much or how little is involved - was left to your Mother, not you and if the people bequeathing it wanted you to have a share, you would have been included in the will.

I'll beg to differ regarding the assumptions.

Person_one

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

A conversation sort of related to this situation- not started by me - which I will not be sharing.

Is there a rule against it or summat?

Just wondered.

Pollycat

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

I'll beg to differ regarding the assumptions.

OK.
Tell me what assumptions I've personally made.
And if I have made any, I'll apologise & edit my post(s).

sulphate

As others have said, legally you don't have any claim over the money.

My parents are slightly older than average (they were 42 & 53 when I was born) so therefore all of my grandparents died a long time ago. At the time I was young and my parents could make good use of the inheritance money (I think they paid off part of their mortgage). I certainly don't feel they should have put it aside for me because I didn't need any money at the time. They always brought me up with values that families help each other. They also believe that money that they earn (and we earn) is not "theirs" but rather family money, that should be spent as and when required. Therefore, if we were a high-earning family and my parents needed financial help, I would bend over backwards to help them. They would be upset if we were living the high life and let them struggle. I know that if they came into some money they would gift some of it to me, that is if they didn't need it of course. It's not that I "expect" it, because I don't, and I've never asked for the money, but it's just how I was raised.

My in laws are different. They never, helped my husband with university, although they could easily afford it, then the year he graduated they upsized and expected him to take unpaid leave from his job to help them move because they didn't want to pay a removal company.

So two ends of the scale.

So... I think it really depends where the money is needed. Does your mother have plans for the money, is she spending it on her house, or saving it for retirement, etc. Do you genuinely need some money for a house purchase or similar, or are you just bad at managing your incomings and outgoings and could do with some free cash? I think the answer to your question depends on individual circumstances as well as your relationship and there isn't enough information given on this thread.

theoretica

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

...just because part of me would like a share of £128,000 that someone didn't need.

I'd quite like a share of any large sums someone doesn't need - it is the step from I would like it to I should have it/should be entitled to it that got people riled up.

pinkshoes

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

I can't decide if I feel a bit badly done to or if I don't really have any entitlement.

My Mother is an only child (as am I) and she was the sole beneficiary of her parent's estate, which was basically a very well looked after bungalow with decent sized gardens. I was not named in the will but I have never seen it nor asked to.

My Mother is in a strong financial position and does not "need" the money. The house has been sold to a young family and was a private sale so I have no idea how much it sold for - she has never told me and I did not ask.

I have no idea how much of the money she had spent and again I habebt asked. She has spent some of the money on me - mainly on things for my house which I didn't ask for and didn't really need but it is easier just to say yes. I would say this came to £2,500 to £3,000.

There are times when I feel that due to the size of the inheritance and the fact that she has not had to split this, I should be told how much she received and that I should have been given between 10 to 25%. There are other times when I feel that it is her legal entitlement and I should stop being so selfish.

What would you do in my Mother's position and how would you feel if you were me?

I sympathise with you!

If I were in your mum's position, and had money I didn't need, I would spend it on helping others out, particularly family.

I always get so cross when I see celebrities with millions and enormous houses pleading to those with very little to donte £10 a month. If they just lived in normal houses, they could still lead a life of luxury and donate millions to help others!

But perhaps she wants you to make it in life by yourself, without her financial backing? Sounds like that is what she did, hence she doesn't need the money...

HeavyMetalFan

Pollycat wrote: »

OK.
Tell me what assumptions I've personally made.
And if I have made any, I'll apologise & edit my post(s).

No need to apologise. Let's just leave it there.

Bogalot

HeavyMetalFan wrote: »

No need to apologise. Let's just leave it there.

I haven't seen any posts that Pollycat needs to apologise for.