A Ditherer's Diary (again)

Naomim

It was quite funny, being stuck at Krispy Kremes. There was a hot rod day in the car park so I took my kids in my then car, a little Kia Picanto.  Got jammed in by all the super cars turning up 🤣 Couldn't get out for hours. I had to get 11yo collected as she was only little and off to a party. I did get given free donuts and coffee 😋  All these souped up cars in the car park and my little roller skate. In the end the police arrived as there were so many cars they were blocking the road and a petrol station opposite. 

Like I said, worse places to be stuck.😋

Naomim

It never rains but it pours 😢  On Sunday coming back from dropping laddo off, MrM's engine light came on.  Get it booked in I said, there's £500 in the car maintenance pot. His car is booked in for Friday.  Today I get in my car to pop out at lunchtime, before I've even moved, my car is juddering, engine light comes on flashing - which definitely means it's not good! So I can bet that two car repairs are going to come to more than the £500 saved up.  I do have my emergency fund and I know it's for things like this but I like to see it sitting there, untouched.

I'm not a happy bunny.

CRANKY40

Oh crumbs - that's bad timing isn't it, both of them at once? I wouldn't be happy either. I hope neither of them are anything too complicated.

Naomim

I had my cambelt replaced last year and it's been driving like a dream. My car is 11 years old and wasn't new when I got it.  I've googled and could be something some like spark plugs. Fingers crossed. 

WinterWarrior

Cars are lovely until they break 😢

FootyFanDan

grr that's crap luck for them both to fault at the same time, hopefully the damage isn't too much and once the work is done you can still see that Emergency fund sitting there.

Naomim

Morning all,

Car is in the garage, hopefully I will hear from them today and it won't be too painful! 

I also renewed my home insurance this week.  It was a slightly higher premium from before as we had a claim last year.  Paid it in full £220 and had £79 left over in the Home Insurance pot so threw that as an overpayment at the Barclaycard.  The Barclaycard 0% runs out this month so now need to check my balance transfer offers and get shuffling!  My worry is Barclaycard reduced my credit limit alongside 1000's of others in a huge purge.  So if I transfer away the balance, they may reduce it even more which won't leave me any room to transfer from my MBNA credit card that has a 0% due to expire in October.

Good news is the credit card balances are currently at £26,847.97 so all heading in the right direction.

I tried to update almost a month's worth of transactions on YNAB and gave up so have hit the fresh start button but still not had time to do this months! lol.  

Onto family life.  Had to go and collect 16yo from the catering trip after 3 days. He was so homesick and when I had a call from him in tears asking to come home, I couldn't refuse and force him to stay. I think he was so out of his comfort zone. It may have been better if he had a friend or even someone his own age there but sadly there wasn't.  I left home at 6am and got back with him around 2pm.  Our petrol expenses have obviously gone through the roof this month! 

MrM has a chest infection - not covid. Done the tests etc. Managed to get some antibiotics from the Doctor but that was a palaver. He managed to speak to the doctor on the phone, not even a video call and they prescribed antibiotics.  He is on the mend and luckily they gave him a sick note so he can work from home as his company are very hot on getting people into the office. 

This Sunday 11yo and I are going to Legoland with our Merlin passes and our packed lunches. Need to make sure we leave around 5pm though to get back in time to watch the football! I'm hoping it might not be too busy as people might want to make a day of preparing for the football.

Not much else happening. Work is work and always busy but I'd rather be busy than not.

Stay safe and well.

Naomim

MissRikkiC

Sorry to hear about both cars and your young one getting home sick. I too wouldn't have encouraged him to stay either. 

Hope you had a lovely time at Legoland and didn't hit traffic coming back. 

Hope your budget almost covered the costs for the cars, i know the EF is there for that but its hard to see it shrink isn't it; even if its for the right reasons. I guess, the positive is that maybe in the past (if youre anything like me) any extras would have gone on the CC but this way there are funds available without worsening the problem. 

I dont yet have a EF as there are a few things which are priority first (Garden fence to stop my little one grabbing the nettles from the field) however we have a broken downstairs toilet, a washing machine which MUST be on the blink as it keeps making such an awful racket and a tumble drier which also must be close to dying as its leaking all the time. Those 3 would easily clear an EF if i did have one but id be so reluctant to spend it!

Naomim

I'm sharing this here as a safe space. If you feel the need to have a go at me about the next part, please #bekind and scroll on by.  

As you know we lost our lovely Ozzie in May and until the possibility of rescuing another cavalier came up, we hadn't really thought about getting another dog.  However, (and this is pertinent to the rest of the story), MrM has been feeling rather neglected by the children. I have much better relationships with them and so he got it into his head we should get another dog. At least someone will love me and be pleased to see me was his thinking.  He is headstrong and pushes and pushes and does it until I cave in. - See the hot tub story.  

So I told him we needed to look on the kennel club and champdogs for assured breeders but they were much more expensive due to the health testing. And whilst we couldn't guarantee a completely healthy dog, the idea is that bloodlines aren't interbred and healthier breed. We were looking at golden retrievers as we didn't want a replacement for Ozzie. Friday night MrM starts looking at adverts on Pets4Homes - Can you guess where this is going?  He finds a litter for sale in Kent. We message and arranged to go and visit the next day.

To cut a very long story short, we brought a puppy home and he sadly passed away just 5 short hours later. We were left with two devastated children.

MrM is completely blaming himself for this, for pushing despite knowing I had wanted to spend more money on a registered, health tested puppy but he didn't want to spend that much. But, I had many reservations and never said anything. In hindsight there were things that were off but being caught up in the moment I just didn't say anything and I am berating myself enough.  I have told him we are equally responsible for different reasons and blaming each other wont change anything.

Because my children are so hurt, mamma bear instincts kick in so I start digging up information. We had partly paid via paypal so I lodged a dispute.  I googled the address we collected the dog from and it came up as social housing so I got in touch with the council. I logged a Police complaint and googled the name on the paypal account. A locked FB account came up but there were a few pictures of the man who had sold us the puppy.  I tried the RSPCA website and phone number but they made it so difficult to log anything anywhere.

The animal control department from the council contacted me. After a royally deserved telling off from her, I gave her all the information. I gave her the name I had and she told me he and his father are prolific sellers in the area. They don't breed but buy in and sell.  She said this is the first time that particular address had been used as a selling base and they and the housing team are making a visit. She said the man is already under an RSPCA investigation, however because I had disputed the Paypal payment he had got in touch with me about the money. I had the foresight to screen shot the conversation. I have sent over the chat history, copies of the microchip card we were given, vets vaccination card (which is a real card), copy of the paypal receipt, the original advert and photo's I took of the "health tests" and apparent KC registered father.   She told me they had already had a legal warning regarding this and my information was great for them to move forward with the investigation. Today I have spoken with the RSPCA investigator and will be providing a written statement tomorrow for them.  The animal control lady called me again today to say they have had another call regarding the same man and a golden retriever puppy that lasted for two days.  The other purchaser is willing to make statements alongside us to build the case.  

Paypal didn't uphold my dispute so the money has gone into his account. I will be trying a chargeback via my bank account.

Whilst I know we were stupid and "caught up in the moment" I am just slightly pleased that I am able to be a thorn in his side or stone in his shoe.  

So all in all it's been a terrible weekend for us all. 

ladyholly

I am so sorry to hear you have been caught by this man. It is heart breaking the way puppies are regarded by these people as a throw away item. The only consolation I can offer you is that at least you may be instrustrumental in stopping him from hurting others in the same way. I dont know how old your children are but have you thought of going the rescue route. I know they have been very short of dogs but they are now receiving more (just be aware that many are lockdown dogs and may have socialisation and behavioural problems). We have got this info from a friend who works at a certain centre in central London.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.