Frump to Fab 2017 - A Whole New World

Floss

Indie has your dad contacted his local Carers group for support? Also, does your mum have a mental health nurse that he can contact for advice / help to bring the appointment forward?

indiepanda

Floss wrote: »

Indie has your dad contacted his local Carers group for support? Also, does your mum have a mental health nurse that he can contact for advice / help to bring the appointment forward?

I don't think he has spoken to a carer's support group but he is talking to a charity (age concern perhaps?) about getting someone in to visit mum which would give him a chance to get out of the house for a bit longer knowing she won't be left too long, which is probably the best thing for him. Just some time alone to get out on his bike or boat, or come up to London to see me (Mum refuses to come with him - hardly goes out the house these days - a trip by car to the supermarket is all she does most weeks and not always that).

Is the carer's support group a charity or would it be organised by NHS or...? Would they help with any care?

I don't think mum has a mental health nurse, she did have some visitors from the local health service for a while and they sent a therapist out too see her too, but she wouldn't really engage properly with them and they stopped coming after a while. Guess with austerity they have to reserve their services for people who will use them as intended. It sounds a dreadful thing to say, but I don't think Mum really wants to make any effort to get better, just wants a pill to solve it all, even though she's been stuffed full of them for years without it curing her.

Floss

There are several national charities: Carers UK; Carers Trust; and Caring For Carers. There may well be more local ones too, but any / all should be able to help whether with advice, info or practical help such as sitting with your mum to give your dad a break.

indiepanda

Floss wrote: »

There are several national charities: Carers UK; Carers Trust; and Caring For Carers. There may well be more local ones too, but any / all should be able to help whether with advice, info or practical help such as sitting with your mum to give your dad a break.

Thanks, google suggested one in his area so have emailed him about it. If they can offer any practical support hopefully he will take it. I can't picture him going to a support group to talk about his feelings with other carers because he is rather private but he might surprise me.

sugarbaby125

Hello Ladies,

I had a really great evening out with my 25 year old daughter on Friday at The Grand in Clapham Junction watching Mama Mia on a giant screen. It was my 1st visit to The Grand and it exceeded my expectations. The subtitles were put on so that everyone who was that way inclined could sing along to all of the songs. The roof was raised with all the singing. We also had a ABBA tribute band for the interval and after the film had finished. People danced sitting down when the film was on and danced on their feet when the tribute band was on. Eat as much as you like popcorn was only £1. Even my daughter who does not know ABBA, sang along and danced with real enthusiasm and I was so glad, as she is usually too shy when she goes out to a social event. I dressed down and wore my trainers as according to my daughter it was not the kind of venue where people really made too much effort with their outfits. In reality there were many people who had made a real effort as their was people who were more casually dressed. She also insisted that it would be people of her own generation, but again she was wrong, as there were many people present of my generation and a few people who looked older. I had a young man who looked about 28-30 years old at most trying to chat me up and giving me compliments in front of my daughter!! I was flattered, but could not flirt with him with my daughter standing there agog that her Mother was being chatted up by a very handsome, Mediterranean looking, fit young man. She had to pick her jaw up off the floor. :rotfl:

My great niece's Christening was such a wonderful day for all of the family and friends who were there. My oldest sister had not been talking to me for years, but she came and sat in the vacant chair to my right and started a conversation with me. I was feeling suitably astonished even as I calmly answered her and continued the conversation. I was really glad because this meant that there was absolutely no tension at the Christening ceremony or at the reception afterwards. I caught up with family and their news as I dare not get up too often to dance. I have to pace myself sensibly, but I had a really good time at the ceremony in a local church and the reception which was in a sports and social centre close to the church.

My great niece was wearing a lovely cream christening gown which turned out to be the original gown that her Father (my nephew) was christened in 30 years ago. I was delighted though surprised to find that my nephew had kept it.

I had quite a hard day yesterday pain wise despite taking pain killers, but hopefully my health will soon be improving once all the tests are completed and the results analysed and I am given information on how to make changes to continue to improve my health and the prognosis for my future health. I spent the whole day and evening resting and taking naps as I felt quite exhausted after my busy weekend. I had a free ticket for a classical concert for yesterday, but I had to cancel it, because I was not feeling well enough to attend, but I have a ticket for comedy shows for this Wednesday and Thursday, I am really looking forward to going and having a good laugh.

chanie

sugar your trip to see Mama mia seems like it was fun. I'm particularly interested in the bottomless popcorn!!! I love the fact that you got chatted up by a young man. Who needs Wayne?????

indie I hope your parents get the support they need, particularly your Dad.

I've been taking advantage of the sales. Back in March, I posted that I was eyeing up a dress. I didn't buy it as I had something similar in my wardrobe and as it was quite expensive, I happily walked away. Well, the dress was reduced to £35, so I snapped it up and I'm delighted that it was such a bargain. I also picked up two cotton t shirts for £13 in the Gap sale for everyday wear.

I'm also getting my done on Friday. I'm trying a new hairdressers and I chose this particular one as when I popped in, they seemed to understand how henna affects hair. Just to recap, I had henna on my hair and when I went to the hairdressers, the colour didn't lift very well. I was going go get an all over colour and highlights, but I've decided just to go for the all over colour cor now - partly due to seeing how my hair takes to the colour and partly due to my sales purchases taking me to the top of my monthly budget.

indiepanda

Morning all.

Well, my feeling of something not being quite right with A turned out to be right. He was really cold with me last night when we were at the cinema - couldn't have sat further away other than if he put a seat in between us, which was odd for someone who is usually very openly affectionate in public. I asked him what was going on and he admitted he had stopped feeling chemistry with me and just wanted to be friends. Which is all very well, but he admitted he had been feeling like this for a couple of weeks, which means he'd made the move to visit me at home and sleep with me for the first time when he wasn't feeling attracted to me anymore - gather he couldn't work out why he'd stopped feeling it and was hoping the feelings would come back. He didn't want to hurt me and apologised profusely, but I just can't work out what the hell he was thinking taking our relationship to the next level if he wasn't attracted to me. I am not sure I will ever understand men!!!! I guess I need to see this as saying way more about his issues than it does about mine - he's never had a proper relationship and admitted he didn't even lose his virginity till he was 33.

I was really upset last night and messaged the tennis player and bless him he messaged me straight back even though he was out at a celebratory meal with a client of his new business and rang me when he got home and cheered me up a bit. He might not have been the right boyfriend for me but he has proved again he can be a really sweet friend.

Needless to say I feel horrid today. Wasn't feeling exactly my best yesterday after one or two too many wines at one of our partner's leaving drinks on Wednesday night, but hardly slept last night and can't face going to work this morning. Fortunately my line manager is a friend and so when I texted an explanation of why I wasn't going to be in she phoned to check how I was and was really understanding about it all.

Am off on holiday hiking tomorrow so that will be a good distraction. Nothing like catching up with old friends and getting some exercise and fresh air and beautiful views to distract you from woes back in the city.

And it's some consolation that I was getting some nice attention on the dancefloor on Monday - one of the chaps asked me to dance four times (at most I've danced two dances with the same guy in an evening before) and asked if I was joining the group for the post dance drinks session. If he asks again I won't have a reason to say no. Not that I want to jump straight into anything too soon... need to let my poor battered heart have a chance to heal!

Hope your Fridays are rather fabber than mine and I'll do my best to be back on my normal positive form on my return.

ali-t

Indie, it definitely sounds like his issue. Move on, be grateful for the lucky escape (and contraception) and find someone worthy of your love and affection.

LaineyT

It's certainly his issue Indie and I am actually quite :mad: on your behalf that he had started to feel this way before he initiated taking the relationship further but still did so.
Enjoy your holiday, relish spending time with your friends doing something you love, accept the attention of the dancing partner and let it be salve to your sore heart.
A is not worthy of you m'dear, hugs x

sukeyboo

Happy Fab Friday everyone

Apologies for having been absent from posting for a couple of weeks but I have been reading. RL just gets in the way sometimes

So sorry to hear about 'A' Indie - that was really selfish of him to let things go that far when he seemed to have already made his mind up about continuing the relationship. Hope you have a lovely time off hiking - where are you off to? As you say, it will give you something else to focus on and hopefully you will come back in a positive frame of mind . Hope things work out with your parents too.

Sugarbaby - hope you are feeling better and that you pain is under control. Mamma Mia sounds like it was great fun - I love Abba :T

Chanie - how did the hair colour turn out? colouring on top of henna can be a tricky business. Hope you are pleased with the result?

Welcome maggiem :hello:

LL - I hope you are continuing to feel better after the awful situation with your sister - exciting times ahead for you and your DS with the house sale - how are things going?

Intend to do a spot of home pampering over the weekend - manicure & pedicure at least. I have been neglecting myself a bit of late - too many issues at home and no time to just sit back and relax. Things seem to be starting to sort themselves out now so with any luck that will change