Family cant afford Christmas

thorsoak

silverwhistle wrote: »

I haven't read the whole thread.

Did the OP ever come back?

No :-( :beer:

Bogof_Babe

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

The one time I lent somebody money 'for the children', I was in the corner shop an hour later, only to hear them come in, buy beer, vodka and cigarettes, then ask for credit so they could 'get the baby nappies'.

Did you pop out and say hello to them? I would have!

How many of us remember when we used to wake up to find a sock with some nuts, a tangerine, a bar of chocolate and half a crown in? Then later we would also get a "big" present - mine was usually two or three Famous Five books. One year I had a little toy xylophone.

My parents were reasonably well off, dad always worked in a good job, and we had everything we needed.

Ah, how times change.

Person_one

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I donate to a food bank all year round. And a 'food bank' for stray cats. :rotfl:

For Christmas specifically I have donated to a homeless charity.

I don't think it is unusual for people to give to charity all year round. Some of these of course will be helping deprived children.

No, not at all, that was my point really, kindness is not a rare trait!

*max*

I really, really don't think Christmas is an appropriate time to "teach kids a lesson", no matter how !!!!less their parents might be. Life is going to be tough enough for them without complete strangers going round, patting themselves on the back for letting them go without presents on Christmas day, because "such if life", and "it'll teach them you don't get anything for nothing!", while the same people are enjoying their turkey and trimmings, presents and family fun.

I truly hope I never become as cold-hearted and cynical as some of the posters here. Teaching kids a lesson about life...by letting them have nothing for Christmas, even though you could have helped it. Lovely. Just...lovely.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

*max* wrote: »

I really, really don't think Christmas is an appropriate time to "teach kids a lesson", no matter how !!!!less their parents might be. Life is going to be tough enough for them without complete strangers going round, patting themselves on the back for letting them go without presents on Christmas day, because "such if life", and "it'll teach them you don't get anything for nothing!", while the same people are enjoying their turkey and trimmings, presents and family fun.

I truly hope I never become as cold-hearted and cynical as some of the posters here. Teaching kids a lesson about life...by letting them have nothing for Christmas, even though you could have helped it. Lovely. Just...lovely.

And some of those people won't be getting lots of presents, food and family fun, but aren't begging off friends for ridiculous sums of money for 'Stuff' that will be broken or forgotten by January 3rd.

I doubt the kids will have nothing, as she won't have asked just the one person, Child benefits are paid separately to UC, and if they are still smoking, they have money.

tesuhoha

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

Did you pop out and say hello to them? I would have!

How many of us remember when we used to wake up to find a sock with some nuts, a tangerine, a bar of chocolate and half a crown in? Then later we would also get a "big" present - mine was usually two or three Famous Five books. One year I had a little toy xylophone.

My parents were reasonably well off, dad always worked in a good job, and we had everything we needed.

Ah, how times change.

I can remember getting really excited at Christmas then getting nothing but the nuts, tangerine and an annual. My parents were pretty hard up and looking back I can see they couldn't afford presents. They were not mean but they would not go into debt for luxuries and they wouldn't ask anyone for anything. I am like that myself now although not as poor as my parents.

I donated to Crisis this year as I have more sympathy for homeless people than anyone else.

EmeraldEye

It wasn't actually established whether the family in question asked for the sum of £500 or if the OP's wife decided on that figure herself.

Nevertheless, I always roll my eyes when I hear/read people say things like "Love is enough for a child at Christmas", that could well be true if said child(ren) has lived their entire life in a bubble with no interaction with other children or seeing commercial advertising etc.

Most children love the idea of Santa (I'm a grown woman and I love the magic of Christmas) and my heart would break if I personally knew of any youngster who wasn't going to receive at least a handful of decent gifts on Christmas morning.

I'm from a working class background (and proud to be) and day to day life was financially difficult when I was growing up, my parents worked full time but there were times when it was a struggle and it wasn't always possible to save money when we couldn't afford to live.

The OP could easily visit The Works for £20 worth of books, Poundland for £10 worth of stocking filler bits, B&M for a fiver of novelty chocolate, The Entertainer for at least two good gifts for each child and Iceland for £25 worth of festive food - All in roughly £120.

£120 that he acknowledges he has to spare, £120 to know you've done a kind thing for others, £120 to prevent the possibility of children from a family in your area waking up on Christmas morning with nothing from Santa.

There are few joyous occasions in life and far too many disappointments, a lesson I am sure we have all learned many times so why any adult would knowingly inflict upset on a child just to spite the parents is beyond me.

£120 is nothing to someone like the OP (from what he has said at least) but it could be everything to the CHILDREN in this situation. I wouldn't want that on my conscience, to not help and later learn that the children didn't get anything.

If I had £120 to give myself I would contact the OP for the details of this family and I wouldn't care if it all turned out to be a fantasy tale because I'd rather risk losing money over a lie than learn of the tears of a child just because I was too caught up in bitterness to care.

The arrogance and judgemental remarks of some of the posters on this thread is stomach churning, people are very petty.

Poor_Single_lady

Absolutely agree Emerald.

You are more articulate than me but this is EXACTLY how I feel about this situation.

Fireflyaway

I wouldn't help them. People like this live by expecting others to help them out and won't change as long as that continues. If this was a one off crisis that's different but you say they haven't worked for years. Your taxes are already helping them. They know Christmas happens every year and you don't have to spend to have a good time. Why use your savings because they can't be bothered to get thier own? There are food banks and charities that give toys to needy families. To be honest they sound lazy.

Pollycat

EmeraldEye wrote: »

It wasn't actually established whether the family in question asked for the sum of £500 or if the OP's wife decided on that figure herself.

That point has been made numerous times throughout this thread.

EmeraldEye wrote: »

The OP could easily visit The Works for £20 worth of books, Poundland for £10 worth of stocking filler bits, B&M for a fiver of novelty chocolate, The Entertainer for at least two good gifts for each child and Iceland for £25 worth of festive food - All in roughly £120.

Maybe the parents would rather have the money to spend on what they feel is appropriate rather than be bought food and presents for the children. :cool:

FTR - I posted days ago that although I wouldn't give money to this family I'd be willing to buy the makings of Christmas dinner plus chocolates for the kids.

EmeraldEye wrote: »

There are few joyous occasions in life and far too many disappointments, a lesson I am sure we have all learned many times so why any adult would knowingly inflict upset on a child just to spite the parents is beyond me.

I agree.
It's beyond me why the parents of these children continue to smoke and drink instead of cutting back to avoid knowingly inflicting upset on their own children at Christmas.