Absolutely crushed by what I've seen. Need advice on what to do. :(

FBaby

Well I think it shows his texts came from a place of guilt rather than still having any feelings. Don't you?

The most important lesson you are in the process of learning: When people cheat/lie/take advantage and they get caught, their inevitable line of defense will involve guilt.

Don't fall for it if you don't want to get hurt. Maybe you are a very truly loving person OP and therefore assume so is everyone else. You are about to learn another lesson, many people are not nice at all and only cares about what they get from a situation, not caring one iota the impact on others.

emberlyn

Pop_Up_Pirate wrote: »

Him texting her to she is she is ok is not a sign of him caring at all. Its a sign of him still being in love and not accepting they have split up.
He carries on with you because, hey, why not? Nothing else going on for him. He might as well see if he can 'Bed the Virgin'.

Besides anything to do with his ex, Why would you want a guy who spends all his time playing an online game and flirting with other girls whilst his gf is left out of it?
Do you honestly think that he wouldn't do the same to you?

You think he's still in love with her? :S He seems like he's accepted to break up though. He was really happy the last weekend I spent with him and the other two occasions I met up with him in Oct and Nov

He doesn't flirt with other girls. He talked to me like I was one of the guys for months. Things were platonic until he split up with his ex.

Pop_Up_Pirate wrote: »

You;re not 18 at all are you?

Not sure what you mean?

FBaby wrote: »

Don't fall for it if you don't want to get hurt. Maybe you are a very truly loving person OP and therefore assume so is everyone else.

My bf has given me no reason to think he isn't a nice caring person either.

justme111

So would nice caring person then texted ex who is trying to get over him saying her he misses their time together?

emberlyn

justme111 wrote: »

So would nice caring person then texted ex who is trying to get over him saying her he misses their time together?

Well he was worried she was really upset and I think he wanted her to know she did mean something. Surely that is better than a guy who never looks back at all as that would be really mean and heartless. I worry you guys think I'm really naive but that's how I see it.

Primrose

I suspect you're probably now being even more confused by all the varying responses you!ve received on this forum. Only time will tell whether your instincts are right. Perhaps time to stop picking at this scab and put the relationship to the natural test.

justme111

So do you think it is good for a person who yries to get over someone to be prodded by that someone saying how he misses her ?

FBaby

Well he was worried she was really upset and I think he wanted her to know she did mean something. Surely that is better than a guy who never looks back at all as that would be really mean and heartless. I worry you guys think I'm really naive but that's how I see it.

You are forgetting the 'he sent loads of texts without a response' you mentioned in your first post. Her last message was 3 weeks before.

Do you really believe this is the action of a man who was helping an ex get over him because she was upset?

AshleyBurf

Give him time, patience, and love. You must always try to love yourself than you love another person. Have a daily practice to do good things for yourself - get into fitness or something you love doing. Throw yourself into that.

It can be harsh to read such things but just focus on yourself.

OneLeggedPig

@emberlyn

I think you've got all you're going to get out of this thread now. People have given their advice and you have to just decide what you want to do now. The advice falls into two categories:

A) People who think he is no good and you should end it
People who think his reasons sound possibly believable and that you should just be careful

So it's up to you from here. As @AshleyBurf said above, don't forget to do things for yourself too. You can't let a relationship become everything there is in your life- that goes for anyone of any age.

Best of luck

emberlyn

Hi guys, I've edited my original post with an update...

Could do with some advice. Thank you lots for being here.