How would you feel if you were 'found out'?

Jacks_xxx

Spirit wrote: »

'fur coat and no knickers"!quote]

This is our finances to a T!

I almost hope everyone in my life would "find me out" and stop thinking I don't like them anymore cos I don't come out to play as much. :rolleyes:

I've tried telling them we can't afford it, but everyone thinks I'm joshing and makes jokes like "Since when has that ever stopped you!! "

When I turn down an invite to an Ann Summers or a Virgin Vie party I get a bewildered "But you love makeup / frilly undies????" Yeah I do. But I can't afford to buy any.

One of my buddies is still hurt because I didn't go to her birthday dinner in July but it would've been £120 for the meal plus drinks before and after and then a club - and I just couldn't do it.

Both hubby's family and mine would make fewer demands on us if they knew the true picture I think.

There'd be less nagging about getting the house painted, what a shame it is that we don't have a smarter car any more, etc.

Less rowing about Christmas....

Less "You wanna tell your tight Mum and Dad to buy you a car son!" comments to my son... :mad:

Fewer comments about me not letting my hubby go down the pub/ have Sky Sports/ a fast car/ etc

And fewer comments about my daughter in front of her about how she must have no clothes cos they always see her in the same tatty things over and over again. :mad:

I haven't told anyone that we're in debt up to our nostrils, but I have said "Sorry, we can't afford it." over and over and over again.

I swear they all think eBay is my fun new hobby! :rotfl:

Martin is on my Friend List on FaceBook (and bl**dy winning all the categories on Compare People too!) plus I forward his emails every week as well as posting links to this site on FaceBook so it's not as if I'm holding anything back!

My daughter's got it right. She was yelling down the phone to one of her mates the other day

"I've told you. We're POOOOOOR!

You can come over and stay for tea, and we can have a sleepover and my Mum will do everyone's hair and nails and we can watch cheesey 80's films and stuff...

but I am NOT asking her for £30 so that we can go iceskating just to pose against the barrier all night, and then NOT eat the pizza we paid for cos girls don't eat and THEN fight over which rubbish film to see cos you've already seen everything!

Take it or leave it love - I can always ask someone else round!"

Oooh I've just cheered myself up typing that out. It's put a big grin on my face.

Love Jacks xxx

PS and my user name is how I habitually sign off emails etc... I really want to be spotted don't I?????

millionaire_in_training

I think I would just die to be honest. Everyone goes on about how amazingly well I manage without my ex. What they dont know about is all the debt I have accrued to make it look that way. I have told everyone that I have a credit card bill but I haven't said how much as I would be mortified.x

bathgatebuyer

I'd be mortified if my Mum knew the extent of my debts at any point. She has always been very careful with money, yet that seems not to have worked very well with me! I think part of the reason I've always done so badly with cash is that we had so little of it when I was growing up. Instead of having pocket money like other kids in my class, I didn't get any, and the worst thing I ever EVER did was take cash from my Mum's purse when I was about 11. To this day, I can't even think about it without hating myself for it.

I guess that's where my strange relationship with money started - it was something I never had, then a few years back I was offered more credit than I can afford and like a complete mug, I bit their hands off for it. As a result, I've paid the price.

For one reason or another, I had to talk about some of this to a counsellor a few years back. Although he couldn't offer any financial advice, he did help me understand why I felt so compelled to spend. When you understand that, it's so much easier to tackle it.

HairyHandofDartmoor

I would be hideously embarrassed to be honest, but I try not to be too revealing, and everyone I know seems to be in a pretty good situation financially.

I would feel quite a failure if my family and friends knew how much I owed. It it only on here that I can be brave enough to 'confess', and even on here I am worried to reveal the amount in case I am spotted!

Ches

My daughter's got it right. She was yelling down the phone to one of her mates the other day

"I've told you. We're POOOOOOR!

You can come over and stay for tea, and we can have a sleepover and my Mum will do everyone's hair and nails and we can watch cheesey 80's films and stuff...

but I am NOT asking her for £30 so that we can go iceskating just to pose against the barrier all night, and then NOT eat the pizza we paid for cos girls don't eat and THEN fight over which rubbish film to see cos you've already seen everything!

Take it or leave it love - I can always ask someone else round!"

With a daughter like that Jacks who cares about being poor. You have it made girl. Well done you.

SarahNeedle1872

Jacks_xxx wrote: »

Spirit wrote: »

'fur coat and no knickers"!quote]

Spirit wrote: »

This is our finances to a T!

I almost hope everyone in my life would "find me out" and stop thinking I don't like them anymore cos I don't come out to play as much. :rolleyes:

I've tried telling them we can't afford it, but everyone thinks I'm joshing and makes jokes like "Since when has that ever stopped you!! "

When I turn down an invite to an Ann Summers or a Virgin Vie party I get a bewildered "But you love makeup / frilly undies????" Yeah I do. But I can't afford to buy any.

One of my buddies is still hurt because I didn't go to her birthday dinner in July but it would've been £120 for the meal plus drinks before and after and then a club - and I just couldn't do it.

Both hubby's family and mine would make fewer demands on us if they knew the true picture I think.

There'd be less nagging about getting the house painted, what a shame it is that we don't have a smarter car any more, etc.

Less rowing about Christmas....

Less "You wanna tell your tight Mum and Dad to buy you a car son!" comments to my son... :mad:

Fewer comments about me not letting my hubby go down the pub/ have Sky Sports/ a fast car/ etc

And fewer comments about my daughter in front of her about how she must have no clothes cos they always see her in the same tatty things over and over again. :mad:

I haven't told anyone that we're in debt up to our nostrils, but I have said "Sorry, we can't afford it." over and over and over again.

I swear they all think eBay is my fun new hobby! :rotfl:

Martin is on my Friend List on FaceBook (and bl**dy winning all the categories on Compare People too!) plus I forward his emails every week as well as posting links to this site on FaceBook so it's not as if I'm holding anything back!

My daughter's got it right. She was yelling down the phone to one of her mates the other day

"I've told you. We're POOOOOOR!

You can come over and stay for tea, and we can have a sleepover and my Mum will do everyone's hair and nails and we can watch cheesey 80's films and stuff...

but I am NOT asking her for £30 so that we can go iceskating just to pose against the barrier all night, and then NOT eat the pizza we paid for cos girls don't eat and THEN fight over which rubbish film to see cos you've already seen everything!

Take it or leave it love - I can always ask someone else round!"

Oooh I've just cheered myself up typing that out. It's put a big grin on my face.

Love Jacks xxx

PS and my user name is how I habitually sign off emails etc... I really want to be spotted don't I?????

Jacks, your daughter is absolute QUALITY!!! She is a proper MSE girl already - u have obviously brought her up well! I hope her savviness (is that even a word?) rubs off on all her mates!

This post put a massive on my face!

madmoney_2

i feel really anonymous posting here, it allows me to rant, and share my debt secrets without feeling fear or shame as i know most ppl are in the same boat. this isnt to do with the anonimity, but the other day i posted to martin about the whole name chamge thing where every1 was going mad about it(in my opinion a little ott), i told him that i had a gambling problem with a certain online bingo site, id lost thousands convincing myself that the next big win was just around the corner and constantly "chasing my losses", until i had my lbm in july of this year. told martin that this site has literally saved my life and just wanted the whole name change saga put into a bit of perspective as thats what the site is here for. martin sent me a pm back just as other half was looking at the screen:eek: it sed you have a private message from mse martin n oh went "ooooh from the man himself lets have a look!" i made some lame-!!! excuse about not being able to read it, as oh doesnt know about the gambling problem i had!!! i would be mortified if he knew!!!!!

mm

SarahNeedle1872

madmoney wrote: »

i feel really anonymous posting here, it allows me to rant, and share my debt secrets without feeling fear or shame as i know most ppl are in the same boat. this isnt to do with the anonimity, but the other day i posted to martin about the whole name chamge thing where every1 was going mad about it(in my opinion a little ott), i told him that i had a gambling problem with a certain online bingo site, id lost thousands convincing myself that the next big win was just around the corner and constantly "chasing my losses", until i had my lbm in july of this year. told martin that this site has literally saved my life and just wanted the whole name change saga put into a bit of perspective as thats what the site is here for. martin sent me a pm back just as other half was looking at the screen:eek: it sed you have a private message from mse martin n oh went "ooooh from the man himself lets have a look!" i made some lame-!!! excuse about not being able to read it, as oh doesnt know about the gambling problem i had!!! i would be mortified if he knew!!!!!

mm

Thanks madmoney..... a close call for u with OH tho!:eek:

madmoney_2

SarahNeedle1872 wrote: »

Thanks madmoney..... a close call for u with OH tho!:eek:

tell me about it, OH is convinced im having an affair with martin now:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

SarahNeedle1872

madmoney wrote: »

tell me about it, OH is convinced im having an affair with martin now:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

:rotfl: I'm glad its not just my OH that thinks that! I talk about Martin and this site so much, OH's convinced himself we're having an online relationship - I've never even had contact with him other than the weekly email!