OS ways and Poor Health

candygirl

Still here, still reading the thread, but not got much to say at rhe mo !!!128547;
Love and healing vibes to you all xx

LameWolf

candygirl wrote: »

Still here, still reading the thread, but not got much to say at rhe mo !!!128547;
Love and healing vibes to you all xx

Updates on the doglets are always welcome.
We are dogless til the two Cavapoos arrive on 28th; the bungalow seems very empty and quiet.

Wednesday I tend to ignore new developments, too; it's too much faff to get a GP appt to start with, and secondly I can't face the idea of more poking and prodding, so I work on the basis of "ignore it long enough and it'll get bored and go away".:D
Don't you be taking a leaf out of my book though - go and get your new lumps'n'bumps looked at.

Prinzessilein

Definite case of brain-fog today....one consequence of which is that I was sure I had replied to this thread not once but twice this morning!

No more snow here, but REALLY cold.

I have been happy to stay huddled up indoors....and with the brain having gone walk-about, I relied on the freezer for food...home-made mushroom soup (I got some beautiful chestnut mushrooms a week or so ago and made a batch of delicious soup...costs pennies and beats a can any day of the week!) for lunch...sausages for dinner.

LameWolf....Bible Journaling is, broadly speaking, using art to respond to the Word...I am not really artistic, but I draw/colour/use stickers/ add ribbons/highlight...whatever I feel reflects what a verse/passage is saying to me....my only caveat is that I do not obliterate the Word (I have one Bible that I use just for journaling...but still don't feel comfortable completely covering the words....I certainly colour over them!...but shading, so I can still read through it!)...If you Google/YouTube Bible Journaling you will see some really amazing examples!

I managed a couple of rows of knitting this afternoon...before deciding to put it away - it is not a complicated pattern, but I really didn't want to spend tomorrow undoing all today's mistakes!!!!

Itisme_2

Recently I realised I'm not doing well mentally. I think I just ignored it for a long time, or I really thought I was sort of coping - but I'm not. Not as I should be. However, even if no one else is proud of me (that I know IRL, at least), I AM proud of me when I do even the slightest thing that is positive. Which I keep trying to do, including posting on here.

I've suspected/known I have ADD/OCD/anxiety for as long as I can remember. Even before I really had any physical problems, at least that I knew of. That's just the beginning, though.

I've definitely had moments where I felt depressed, but fortunately it was never a constant thing, at least that I was aware of. I've had abuse, either from family, relationships and/or friends, for a long time now. Some of those I had to, and managed to, stop contact with, but not all of them. If you're at all familiar with narcissistic abuse, you'll understand how it hasn't exactly improved my mental state.

Without needing therapy (I won't rule it out, but I'd rather try other avenues first) I want to cope better, and I just wanted to finally properly admit this to someone other than myself. That's the first step, right? I have issues, and sometimes positive coping mechanisms - music, writing, de-cluttering, puzzles, colouring et al, is enough to get me through. Other times, I just feel like I'm losing track of how to function properly.

I'm also dealing with addiction (alcohol), which honestly got worse because at times it made me feel more "normal" physically (just a few to help nausea/pain et al). Although a few can easily become more and more. Obviously hangovers made all that 100 times worse, but it still became a coping mechanism (albeit a bad one), but at least I haven't done some other negative "coping mechanisms" in a long time.

Sorry for the long post, but thanks for reading if you have.

LameWolf

Prinzess many thanks for the explanation of Bible Journalling; it sounds fascinating. I think the closest thing I would know of is a Book of Shadows; but the main difference is that one draws from whatever is inspirational, from whatever source (one of my favourites is a piece written by Chief Dan George of the Coast Salish entitled "Something We Must Have" - he is referring to Love, and I had a friend read this piece out when Mr Wolf and I got married) and one writes/draws the whole thing oneself. I have never gotten around to doing a proper Book of Shadows, but I think maybe I will.....

Itisme I'm not the most eloquent of people (we need Polly for that) but well done on writing that post; the first step on a journey to a better you is recognising what you need to do to get there. If it's any comfort, I could've written a lot of that post myself - what I'm trying to say is I know where you're coming from. Keep posting about it; the great thing about this thread is it's supportive and not at all judgmental (which is why I like it of course).

Special dins tonight - Summer In Winter Qu0rn - because it's Ostara, the Spring Equinox today - so I'd better hit the kitchen next.

Wednesday2000

LameWolf - I'm so glad it is the start of Spring. Are you Pagan? I used to have quite a few Pagan/Wiccan friends and go to events in London with them.:) I was looking at the Mind Body Spirit event online for this year the other day. I went to that a few times in the past.

Itisme wrote: »

Recently I realised I'm not doing well mentally. I think I just ignored it for a long time, or I really thought I was sort of coping - but I'm not. Not as I should be. However, even if no one else is proud of me (that I know IRL, at least), I AM proud of me when I do even the slightest thing that is positive. Which I keep trying to do, including posting on here.

I've suspected/known I have ADD/OCD/anxiety for as long as I can remember. Even before I really had any physical problems, at least that I knew of. That's just the beginning, though.

I've definitely had moments where I felt depressed, but fortunately it was never a constant thing, at least that I was aware of. I've had abuse, either from family, relationships and/or friends, for a long time now. Some of those I had to, and managed to, stop contact with, but not all of them. If you're at all familiar with narcissistic abuse, you'll understand how it hasn't exactly improved my mental state.

Without needing therapy (I won't rule it out, but I'd rather try other avenues first) I want to cope better, and I just wanted to finally properly admit this to someone other than myself. That's the first step, right? I have issues, and sometimes positive coping mechanisms - music, writing, de-cluttering, puzzles, colouring et al, is enough to get me through. Other times, I just feel like I'm losing track of how to function properly.

I'm also dealing with addiction (alcohol), which honestly got worse because at times it made me feel more "normal" physically (just a few to help nausea/pain et al). Although a few can easily become more and more. Obviously hangovers made all that 100 times worse, but it still became a coping mechanism (albeit a bad one), but at least I haven't done some other negative "coping mechanisms" in a long time.

Sorry for the long post, but thanks for reading if you have.

I know you said you wouldn't want to try therapy but it's probably best to try and tell your GP about how you feel and see if they can suggest something. Your mental health is as important as your physical health.xx

I've been diagnosed with various MH issues including MDD, BPD, OCD, in fact I won't go into it all now!:o The therapy I had did work very well as it is sometimes very helpful to talk to someone impartial.

Itisme_2

Thanks everyone, and yes any type of support is better than none. Since just getting some thoughts out there I feel better about it, and I'm going to focus on one area at a time, one little action even, to try and improve things. Find out what helps, basically.

Low spoons physically today, but have been doing some calming activities (puzzles at the moment).

LameWolf

Hi Wednesday yes I am Pagan. I'm what you'd call a Solitary, though; I've attended a few Wytches Markets when they've been held locally (got some super clothes at one!) but don't go to conferences etc; and sadly our local Moot has closed down; the nearest one now is in Northampton, but it's not wheelchair accessible.

I'm stressed out today; we have Mr Wolf's pal coming over, and I have no dog here. (If I start feeling shaky and need a time out, I use the old "Pooch needs to visit the garden" line). It's stupid, I've known the chap literally as long as I've known Mr Wolf, but I still can't get my head around having Visitors In The House. :eek:

pollyanna_26

Belated Ostara blessings / Welcome to spring everyone .

Been busy here and real life has been equally busy for us . The jigsaw we've been building of dds life is getting bigger by the day . All very positive but exhausting . There isn't a roll up mat big enough to hold it as one thing after another emerges . We now have disassociation in the picture . Which explains dds falls from climbing frames , being found unconscious on her way home from school and many times she'd blanked out with no memory afterwards .

It has been reassuring as brain scans had failed to pick up any abnormality .

Well you've all been chatty while I've been busy elsewhere . Tomorrow I will read properly with the usual sheet of A4 and pen at my side .

Wolfy you must be confusing me with someone else . Eloquent moi ? :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Lovely to see you Prinzess . The weather hasn't helped has it ? Flares all round . How's your dear Mum ? I hope her foot isn't as troublesome now .

Anyway if i don't stop now I'll end up replying to everyone now without remembering who said what .

Sleep well all , See you tomorrow .
polly x

pollyanna_26

This may be one of the days you'll all tire of looking at The Glasgow Rose

I'm going to try responding to different points without losing track .

Prinzess the reconsideration process of PIP isn't quite cut and dried yet . The sheer cost of assessing every claim from that period whether positive or negative is off the scale . It is possible the focus will be on those cases which went to tribunal level . Hopefully some clarification will emerge .

Wednesday I would agree with the other posters . Putting in a claim wont hurt . We've all pointed out it isn't a walk in the park but unless things don't go as expected it's a huge raising of anxiety and stress levels during the long wait from sending in the claim form to finally getting a decision .

You will see on this thread positive outcomes as well as a few which resulted in a lower award than should have happened .
You will always see far more negative stories both on the Benefits thread and elsewhere online .

That's human nature you react more strongly to negatives to positives . We were just grateful and exhausted when the letter arrived from the decision maker .

I did post on this thread and the disability thread about the outcome to put a positive account there . I did find myself replying to what turned out to be a well known troll on the other thread . Only took a couple of posts and I sussed him out . Prinzess did the same thing .

The comment by Tink about looking too well dressed struck a chord with me . DD has heard that so many times along with too young to have whatever it is .
All my children grew up learning it was good manners to be clean and neat . She was 7 years old before any inkling of her struggles appeared so somewhere in the muddled years that stuck in her mind .
There were many years when she hid under the duvet or went AWOL when she wasn't clean or well dressed .

She is now comfortable to visit the GP and her new Counsellor in a less pristine state . She saw her nurse a few weeks ago wearing a hat and confessed she'd been sick in her hair just as we were leaving the house . Sometimes her best friends are dry shampoo and or baby wipes .
Most of the time she's well presented but attending an appt is more important than cancelling due to exhaustion .

CAB are snowed under with requests but may be worth a try . There's some good advice on the Benefits thread . Alice has posted a lot of info over there as have a number of other regular posters .
Just beware of the troll , I think you'll soon identify him .

Remember when you fill in the form it isn't about your condition but how it affects your day to day life .

I was diagnosed with OA not long after my 30th birthday . it doesn't seem age specific . It's a common perception to she it as age related but it isn't .

Thank goodness for pet insurance . Has he had the tests now ?

BTW I personally wouldn't depend on online fibro groups or similar for benefits advice . There are very good sources of information over on the benefits thread .

Well this has taken ages to type . I need a secretary .:rotfl::rotfl:

Back in a little while
polly