How to change stepson's surname?

PaulMike

Hi all,

Don't treat harsh, my first post here.

My partner's son is 8 and has his dad's surname. His dad does not see him, sends (very) small maintenance payments, and does not support a change to his son's surname.

Me and partner are not married. We both would like son's surname to be changed.

What's the process to do so, and what sort of money are we talking about?

Thank you.

Mojisola

If his father has parental responsibility, you will need him to agree to the name change.

iammumtoone

What does your stepson want? At 8 he will be old enough to have some say and understand.

If your stepson wants his name changed maybe this will make his father re-think.

penguingirl

I can't tell from your post- do you want his surname changed to yours or his mum's? That's assuming mum's is different to dad's (either a maiden name or never married). What name does he want?

missbiggles1

PaulMike wrote: »

Hi all,

Don't treat harsh, my first post here.

My partner's son is 8 and has his dad's surname. His dad does not see him, sends (very) small maintenance payments, and does not support a change to his son's surname.

Me and partner are not married. We both would like son's surname to be changed.

What's the process to do so, and what sort of money are we talking about?

Thank you.

I'm afraid that if you're not married to his mother, he isn't your stepson.

sheramber

http://www.deedpoll.org.uk/CanIChangeMyChildsName.html#Section3

cr1mson

I think you need to speak to your 'stepson' about what he wants. What he sends in terms of maintenance payments will probably be of no interest to him but end of the day the surname is a connection to his Dad.

FBaby

How long have you been together and do you intend to marry? Changing a name is a big thing because it's not just about the name of X parent, but the identity he will have formed through it.

My mum changed my name when I was about that age, from my dad's to hers (not legally, she couldn't but for current use, school etc..) and even though I never told her so not to hurt her feelings, I hated it. It wasn't because I wanted my dad's name (I did have a good relationship with him), but because I considered myself as Jane Father's Surname, not Jane Mother's Surname.

When I moved out and went to Uni, I reverted my name to my father's and even after marrying in my late 30s, I had an issue with changing it and ended up going by both names, more often still Father's name!

Not to clear either if you are asking him changing name to his mums or yours, but if you mean yours, but I do find it odd that it would be yours so that he would still have a different surname than his mum's. I don't see the point of that and in any case, without consent from the dad (if he has parental responsibility), you would really struggle to convince a judge to do so (judge might agree to changing to Mum's surname depending on circumstances).

Browntoa

having been both a stepson and a stepdad I would never consider changing names

Pollycat

What is the reason for you and your partner wanting to change the child's name?

My Mum remarried when I was the age this child is - my biological Father never saw me and never contributed a penny to Mum for me - but I retained my surname.
IIRC, there was no thought about changing my name to that of my stepdad.

What would be the benefit for the child if his surname was changed?

I agree with the other posters who have queried which name you want the child to take - yours or his Mum's.

Tammykitty

You need the fathers permission (assuming parental responsibility)


Definitely don't change the child's surname to yours - you can't have the child's surname changing every time the mother gets a new relationship.


And don't change the name without asking the child