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Bereft and Broken

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  • Ps my autocorrect is so annoying and it corrected your name to 'simply'... I wasn't being rude!!! ;-)

    You can always go back and edit your post - there's a button at the bottom of the post that gives you the option to edit. :-)
    🎉 MORTGAGE FREE (First time!) 30/09/2016 🎉 And now we go again…New mortgage taken 01/09/23 🏡
    Balance as at 01/09/23 = £115,000.00 Balance as at 31/12/23 = £112,000.00
    Balance as at 31/08/24 = £105,400.00 Balance as at 31/12/24 = £102,500.00
    £100k barrier broken 1/4/25
    SOA CALCULATOR (for DFW newbies): SOA Calculator
    she/her
  • How's it all going, Smolly?

    I just had a sneaky peek at the program ada-or-ardor mentioned and it does look better than Microsoft money and simpler than YNAB. The syncing thing is great, I can do that with the online YNAB but not with the downloaded copy because my laptop is too old to work with dropbox. I may give goodbudget a go myself :)
    :happylove
  • Smolly
    Smolly Posts: 216 Forumite
    Fourth Anniversary
    Hello all! And so sorry for my absence. I really must sort out my settings - I get notifications for everyone else's diary but never my own when someone posts!

    PM, Thistle and EH - thank you ladies for popping by. ada - welcome and thank you so much for your post. It actually brought a little tear to my eye when I read it (a nice tear!) I am so pleased you have emerged out of lurkdom to comment on my thread and leave such kind comments and I don't mind being called 'simply'! I have been so lucky on this thread with my little band of slipper-clad supporters and when I read your comments this morning before going to work I was really touched. Thank you.

    Thank you for the advice about the budgeting app. It sounds right up my street and just what I was after. I am going to have a look at it later once I've managed to catch up and hopefully put it into play from the 28 November when I next get paid. I really don't know how I got to this stage in the month with the limited resources I've had but something always seems to turn up fortunately.

    Thistle - I did get the main letter done thank you. Although not when I said! It took until the following morning to actually do it and post it off. I've finally been able to cross it off my list, but you know what - it had been on there so long I actually miss it now!:rotfl:

    Well today turned up something good - always have a good moan will be my motto from now on! After the Friday Fiasco with CLL and me losing my cucumber with her and then having the big bosses come down to sort it out - something good has come out of it. It all boils down to the CLL being utterly useless and slow at what she does so that we all end up carrying her. She often stays behind after she has supposed to have gone because she has never finished her jobs and we work in an environment where you can't carry stuff over to the next day. It has to be finished that day. So when the big bosses came down it came out that she is not happy about not being paid for overtime (even though this is her own doing) so they have decided to give her an extra half hour to ensure that she does manage to get her jobs done before she leaves. And bless them they've given me an extra half hour a day too as I made a comment I couldn't afford to have my hours cut to get someone else in to help. So I've got an extra 2.5 hours a week on a temporary basis from next week. Not much but baby steps (sorry EH forgot I'm at toddler stage now!):D

    ada - your comments about my writing style were lovely. I have always loved writing - I remember winning a trampoline and some scholl shoes (!) when I was a kid after writing a piece for a national children's magazine (why the heck would a kid want scholl sandals?) They were quite hideous - brown and chunky and blessed be the day when the dog ate them. I doubt however that I would have the guts to start something like a blog, but then I am open to all money making schemes so will have a little ponder. Thank you for the push!

    I have to say I have a very amusing mystery shop coming up. One that requires me to wear 'spy glasses'! :cool: I think I will struggle to stop giggling when the time comes. I haven't got the specs yet but have this awful thought in my head that they will be enormous and obvious! We will see. Just call me 007!

    I am really wanting to do a MS for a shop I use regularly on my way to work. I always pick the same assistant on the same till to put my transactions through because she is such a miserable thing I love making her day worse. Today I could see her at the far end of the shop and gleefully rang her little bell (on a chain so no one can pinch it) so that she had to stop her little gossipy chat and humpfh her way over to me, asking me when I got there if I wanted to 'buy that'. Nope I just fancy holding it stood at your till while I ring your little bell. Not once has this happy soul smiled, said hello, or please or thank you. She looks like she hates her job and all the customers who ring her bell. She should meet the CLL. That would really give her something to be miserable about!:D

    Now one final thing before I go - I sincerely believe that the OH has had a personality transplant. Not sure what has triggered the change, but this week has seen him offer to help me out financially with a rather large bill which has come my way, and then to take me shopping to bulk buy household necessities.....and.....PAY FOR THEM! If anyone finds my OH's former personality then please feel free to dispose of it as you feel fit. I do not want it back.

    Ok so enough ramblings for now. I am going to catch up on a few more diaries and then look at the budgeting app that ada recommended.

    Before I leave I shall leave you with a little quote that my dearest step-son brought with him on his last visit. Sincere apologies to anyone who may be offended but I'm sure you won't as it's quite harmless and it really makes me giggle every time I think of it...

    And the Lord said unto John - 'come forth and receive eternal life'.
    ...But John came fifth and won a toaster.

    My sense of humour is very simple!

    xxx
    LBM Jul 16 £26,823.83, Nov 16 £27,961.98, Dec 16 £26,977.66, Jan 17 £26,884.76
    EF #205 £0/£1000
  • Smolly wrote: »

    And the Lord said unto John - 'come forth and receive eternal life'.
    ...But John came fifth and won a toaster.

    This made me roar with laughter Smolly - my Dad says something similar, only his payoff line is "But he came fifth and lost his beer money!" :rotfl::rotfl:

    Sounds to me as though they are lining CLL up to get rid if she doesn't clean her act up. Giving her the extra time to get her work done means that if they go on to take her through a disciplinary, they have evidence that they've tried to do their bit to help her...smart move! Excellent that you also have the extra time as well - that will really help, won't it! :T

    Also great news about your OH - I wonder what has made the difference?! We won't knock it though, eh! :rotfl:
    🎉 MORTGAGE FREE (First time!) 30/09/2016 🎉 And now we go again…New mortgage taken 01/09/23 🏡
    Balance as at 01/09/23 = £115,000.00 Balance as at 31/12/23 = £112,000.00
    Balance as at 31/08/24 = £105,400.00 Balance as at 31/12/24 = £102,500.00
    £100k barrier broken 1/4/25
    SOA CALCULATOR (for DFW newbies): SOA Calculator
    she/her
  • ERICS_MUM
    ERICS_MUM Posts: 3,579 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    Evening girls and apols for silence. Smolly you sound upbeat and much more 'pushy' in a nice way ! Perhaps it's scared OH into taking more notice of you.

    I remember Scholl sandals, one of the first things I bought when I started work in 1974. Lots of women wore them in the office so I took mine in and changed into them. Boy, did they give me cramp, never wore them again.

    Feeling a bit miserable at the mo. A young man I used to work with died from cancer 3 weeks ago age 42. I was away and couldn't go to his funeral. I worked in a large office environment for 35 years and knew hundreds of people over that time. It always shocks me how many people in the prime of their lives died so young, well before retirement age. Life is such a lottery, so many obstacles to conquer.

    Hope we all have a peaceful weekend ! Xx
  • I'm so glad things seem to be going well Smolly, and yay for DH putting his hand in his pocket! Long may it continue :j

    I agree with EH, it sounds like CLL may be on her way out. My DH is in a similar situation (having to carry someone who is useless) but it's his manager. He got tired of doing his own work and hers as well (all she wants to do is sit in her office and talk on the phone to friends, be on fb, go out for long lunches, etc.) so now he's basically doing just his own job. The place has turned into a huge mess, if she doesn't get her behind in gear and actually do her job, she'll be out as well. He doesn't want her out, he just wants her to do her job.

    I'm sorry Eric'smum, life can be !!!! sometimes. 23 people that I know of from my high school class have passed away, and an alarming amount (12 I think?) before they were 30. I think back to how alive and optimistic we all were about the future, who would have thought that in such a few short years some of us would not be here anymore? A boy who lived a few houses down from me and who was my very first friend from age 3 died last year from a brain tumour, it's all so sad. :(

    On to cheerier things - that quote made be spit my tea onto my laptop keyboard. :p The main man in the band is always coming out with things like that, I love a good chuckle!

    I haven't had time to sit down with the budget program but did watch the first video and it seems fairly simple. I am still working away listing things on ebay, so it might be a day or so before I really check it out. Have you had a look yet? If so, what did you think?
    :happylove
  • Smolly
    Smolly Posts: 216 Forumite
    Fourth Anniversary
    Thank you ladies for popping by!

    CLL should most definitely be lined up for her grand exit however the managers seemed scared to give her the push. Wimps! We will see EH if the extra half hour does actually do any good. I'm not knocking it though - it helps me out having a bit of extra time.

    EM so sorry to hear about your friend. But thank you for popping in. I hope otherwise you are ok x

    Thistle - I can't get over the numbers of people you have known from school who have passed away. That is a tremendous number - absolutely awful. To be honest I don't keep in touch with any of my school 'friends'. I was a bit of a loner myself at school and of course I moved away so it may be that some of them are no longer around. I just don't know. Anyway - let's get off this subject.

    I have been robbed ladies. Someone has stolen the OH's new personality and replaced it with the old one. :( Dang it! It's all a bit funny actually. There he was this morning going off about stuff - moaning about me visiting Mum (twice in one week) and how he's not going to give me any more money; how he did not say he would help me out with my big bill to come - he 'might' help but he wants it paying back; and how all the shopping he did the other day for the house needs to be paid back....

    I just smiled sweetly and let it drift in one ear and straight out the other. I think I will adopt this approach this week - be jolly nice, not listen to a word he says and see if I can find the nice OH who isn't a big grump.

    Thistle and ada - I have been playing around with the new budget app and think I will like it very much. I didn't realise there were any videos to watch though - are these on the desktop site or YouTube Thistle? I think I have all my 'envelopes' set up ready - I just need the cash now! The free app allows you up to 20 envelopes - I need more! I have had to stick certain items together to free up an envelope here and there but I can make it work with what I have and certainly don't want to pay anything for more envelopes.

    I have done a couple of mystery shops today and am just sat here with Mum writing them up - well I'm not at the moment but I will get back to it in a mo. And tomorrow I have things I really want to get done.

    The 3Bay room is to be cleared - it needs emptying if we are to get it into any fit state for guests at Christmas. Goodness knows where everything will go but I can be a bit crafty with hiding stuff....

    I also want to get a few more bits of DS's on FB and 3Bay as his stuff is just cluttering up his bedroom floor and you can't move around it.

    I also want to visit the tumble drier - it's only located in the garage but it is such a faff to get to it. I think I last used it a year ago. However, I am struggling to get things dried in the house and things like jeans and towels take forever so I am going to have a day in between sorting and listing of washing heavy items and getting them dried and straight away.

    Anyway I am getting off now and may return later....

    Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend xx
    LBM Jul 16 £26,823.83, Nov 16 £27,961.98, Dec 16 £26,977.66, Jan 17 £26,884.76
    EF #205 £0/£1000
  • The numbers are unbelievable to me as well, as the class before and the class afterwards are both at around 8. I only know about them all because there is a memorial page set up for our school. Some of us were wondering if there was something in the injections we had as babies, like maybe there was a tainted batch for our year, or if we were exposed to something. Most have died from various cancers, though there were a few from other diseases. The rest were car/bike accidents, a stabbing, and a couple suicides. One lovely guy was a hemophiliac and died from AIDS that he contracted from a blood transfusion. He was the first to go. I knew them all as most of us had been at school together from a very young age, but they weren't all close friends.

    I'm sorry about OH, and it seems rather unfair that he wants paying back for putting his hand in his pocket. I don't really understand your financial situation - does he consider what he earns to be 'his' money alone? I'd ignore him too in any case.

    As for the budget program - if you click on this link (if it doesn't work, look for the help home page) http://help.goodbudget.com/ there should be 'getting started' videos and articles about various things. I haven't yet had a good look but am planning on taking a day next week to get everything set up properly.

    I am a bit jealous of your mystery shopping - I get offered aprox one job every 3 months and usually I don't qualify for them. :(

    Has the ebay room been cleared with all your selling? My pile is growing smaller everyday, it's so nice to see it going down. All it's taking is some effort on my part - I think I was hoping it would magically dissappear on it's own. :o

    I hope you're having a nice weekend. There is a certain political leader giving a speech in the local park today - the park is less than a 5 min walk so I am going to head on over and listen to what he has to say. I'd love for this man to be PM, but apparently he's unelectable... :rotfl:
    :happylove
  • Oh Smolly, what a shame about OH. I agree with Thistle, I'm confused by his approach to finances, how can he be so cruel and stingy with things like food for the house he shares with his wife and son...!? But I know from your first posts that your relationship is complicated, so I'm just glad you seem to have found a zen-based approach to his nonsense. You need to track down his personality surgeon and get a refund for that defective transplant! ;)

    On the app thing, it's taking me some time to get used to the whole system, like a good few weeks. It's annoying about the envelopes being limited; I have just done quite broad categories, like 'Essentials' that actually has some non-essentials lumped in there! And then ones that I'm really working to cut down my spending, have a dedicated one for those so I can really track what I'm spending in there, and use the reports to analyse that. But don't worry, it does take some time to get the system set up and working in a way that works for you. My November pay will be my first proper month of income and expenses using the app, so I'm looking forward to seeing how the (very expensive) Christmas period works out and how it helps me stick better to a budget than previous years.

    I hope your voyage to the tumble drier went okay Smolly; especially with this colder weather it is so hard to get things dried. We don't have a tumbler, we have one of those heated airers which is really good actually for a small flat, but it is quite unsightly and because we can only dry a small batch of things at a time, we have to do a small-ish load of washing every few days, and so it feels like we always have the bloody airer up! I'm just glad we have a spare room that we can close the door on it!

    Hope everyone had a nice weekend! :)

    Ada
  • Smolly
    Smolly Posts: 216 Forumite
    Fourth Anniversary
    Thank you Thistle and ada!!!

    Thistle I had been wondering if there was something in the water around your area but I think it must just be a terrible coincidence. It must all be quite upsetting though xx

    OH hasn't been too bad today fortunately - in fact he's been rather good so my smiling sweetly tactic must be working, either that or I just can't hear him as I've switched off to him! Sometimes I really wish there was a hidden camera in our house with a big brother type person watching who could then come back to him and say - 'do you realise what a plonker you are? Just look at this...'

    I have been back on G00dBudget and worked my way through a few videos. All seems straightforward enough but like you say ada I think it will require a bit of practice and time to see what works best. I have seen however that you can add accounts for things like credit card debt, so that you can actually see it going down. You have to subscribe to that though although it's something like $5 or £4 a month. Still too much for me at the moment but like you ada I will give it a go and see how I get on with the free stuff. I'm really looking forward to the 28th now when I can start filling my virtual envelopes.

    I haven't budgeted at all well this month to be honest. I've kept within my food budget but not actually had the money upfront to do it. Each day I have checked my current balance and there's been a note most days along the lines of....'there is an issue with your account'.:eek: I haven't actually gone overdrawn at that stage they are just warning me I will if I don't take action. Fortunately I've had the money somewhere that I can borrow or take from my Paypal from 3Bay sales to top it up but it's been rather dicey at times.

    I knew my balance was a bit hit and miss this weekend but I've managed to make about £32 on 3Bay this weekend which will see me through the week. I've done a food shop today with vouchers (that were for Christmas but this was needed now) and it's just petrol now I need. I have already told Mother I will not be seeing her on Thursday as I can't afford to come up. She said she would pay for petrol but I declined. My brother has just had a whole week off for the second time this month as he loves his holidays so I shall take a break too and be back there Saturday.

    I'm lucky Thistle with the mystery shops. I think I mentioned I was registered with 4. I check them all daily but don't just accept jobs in my home town. As I visit Mum regularly I pick up shops on the way there and at Mum's town too. I have one tomorrow in my own town which I had seen but really didn't fancy but they rang me up and offered me an extra £2.50 (ooh!) for doing it. As it's only 5 minutes from where I work I couldn't really say no.

    One of the companies I work for you don't actually have to apply. If you can do the assignment in the time scale asked for then all you have to do is answer a few questions and then it's yours. The others I do have to apply for. One is getting easier to get the assignments accepted as I have done a few for them now, but the other one is really difficult. Plus they have quite long and difficult assignments in my opinion which although are great payers I just don't really qualify for.

    I have cleared out as much as I can from the 3Bay room - what's left is a rather large cumbersome filing cabinet (full), my life-sized mannequin:D (more on that another day!), a couple of bits to sell and some random bits belonging to OH and SS. I think I have done rather well. I also managed to get 4 things listed on 3Bay today but didn't get chance to list any of DS's toys and books on FB as I had hoped.

    Keep plugging at your piles Thistle :eek:- you know what I mean! You will get there in the end!

    Voyage to the tumble drier was done with limited injuries ada thank you. I had to move a barbeque and bike just to get to the inner door, then opened it to find a large ladder and electric scooter blocking the doorway! I managed to squeeze in, but had to move a Bl@ck & D3ck3r workmate out of the way and voila! There was my tumble drier! Rather dusty but she fired up bless her. It was such an effort to get in and out of the garage though that I just managed one trip. I kept looking at the garage wondering if it I was going to see smoke billowing out of it but all was fine.

    I would love one of those heated airers - they're supposed to be quite cheap to run? Mum loves to watch QVC (sorry couldn't find a way to abbreviate that any other way) maybe QueueVSee??? and last night they were advertising the heated airers from perhaps one of my favourite shops of all time - L@keL@nd. Comes a close second to C0stC0!!! I was practically slavering at the airers (sad am I) but of course I didn't succumb. I did make a few appropriate noises along the lines of - WHAT A LOVELY CHRISTMAS PRESENT THAT WOULD MAKE MUM but she is deaf and chose not to hear! Last year I got a vacuum cleaner....:rotfl:

    Anyway I have rambled enough. I have a report to write for work which is incredibly boring but I will be in trouble if I don't do it.

    Good night all and hope everyone has had a lovely weekend xx
    LBM Jul 16 £26,823.83, Nov 16 £27,961.98, Dec 16 £26,977.66, Jan 17 £26,884.76
    EF #205 £0/£1000
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