Estranged child

[Deleted User]

I think you and your son will have to persist with social work. I left an abusive house at 17, there was physical and emotional abuse. I seemed to attract most of it but I did have a younger brother (three years younger). He was the 'golden boy' and I was considered to be the black sheep of the family, so unfortunately, I never thought he was at risk. I was pretty damaged by what went on and it was only later, when I heard what went on with him after I left that I realised I'd abandoned my brother to face what I'd faced. He walked around with bruises and god knows what emotional abuse he suffered. I stayed until I couldn't anymore. I left to survive.

He is now a hermit. Won't have any contact with me, has never had a long term relationship and left home too at 17. He has no contact with his father although I do. Too angry.

I have a lot of regrets that I didn't even think of him as being at risk.

Some social workers are good, some really aren't. But its worth persisting with social workers. Try and have some contact with your younger son so he knows there is a safe place.., emotionally and physically. I know its not an easy situation and you will probably always find this a difficult situation to deal with with no perfect resolution.

I'm sorry, I know you wanted advice about helping your older son, and I know what I say won't make things easier but protecting your younger son is important too.

Person_one

marcarm wrote: »

Again, my son is going to leave it a couple of days and then get in touch with them to say he is worried about his brother.

If you're really saying that your teenage son was so worried about his brother's safety in the care of his mother that he arranged and paid for childcare even though the mother was going to be present, then I don't see how you can wait a couple of days.

If this child is now in the sole care of this woman surely he's in as much danger now as he was on that occasion and you need to be making an emergency call about his wellbeing?

mellymoo74

Person_one marcam has already saying neglectful not abusive so allowing it to calm down isn't going to cause any additional harm and a 17 year old and his worried dad will have taken this not account.

Hopefully your eldest is still feeling positive marcam