Daughter withdrew from holiday but person who booked it dragging feet over refund

FBaby

How sad that your daughter would pull out now. What is it that makes her anxious, going away with friends who will be there with her?

It sounds like your daughter needs help with encouragement rather than taking over and doing things she doesn't want to do. I think the best thing to do would be to encourage your daughter to speak with Ann's mum directly. Surely she isn't a total monster. At most, go there but let her do the talking, prepare in advance how to approach the situation.

It might be that she is entitled to some money back, or maybe not, or maybe it is not too late to work with her through her fears and apprehension so she can see for herself that she can cope and have a great time going abroad with friends.

leylandsunaddict

phebe3 wrote: »

Daughter has checked with Thos Cook ,who they have booked through, and she can get some money back IF Ann does the refund.

I think a power game is being played here, so we are just going to wait and see...can't actually go round to Ann's house anyway and sit her on pc to force her to do it! She keeps saying she can't be bothered with it all and refuses to do it. I can't see what the problem is...beyond power and Ann being p*****ed off that my daughter has actually stood up against her and said no more, not going. It's no skin of their noses whether she goes or not.......but it makes me cross cos it's not Ann's money it's my daughter's and she has asked and asked her, in writing, to cancel her place. Due to the law re lead travel person having control of the booking we can do nothing...which seems wrong somehow..

How did TC tell your daughter there is something due when they can't discuss the booking with her? They would only be able to say that if they went through the booking and re-costed it, which they shouldn't and wouldn't do for anyone but the lead passenger. Until a re-costing is done they wouldn't know if any refund was due.

Booking to go away with friends (on the same booking) is often a disaster when someone wants to cancel.

If Ann's mum booked the holiday I'm guessing Ann is under 18? If so, legally her Mum has entered into a contract with the tour operator, and as such I would get your daughter to discuss it with her.

stephb34

phebe3 wrote: »

There is very bad feeling and the group is controlled by Ann...we did warn her not to book but hey, teenagers know best! Re the organisation...my daughter did q a bit of that but I refused to pay the deposit for all 5 girls as I didn't trust them (rightly so) so Ann's mum sorted it out. (not for my daughter, she paid )Daughter has checked with Thos Cook ,who they have booked through, and she can get some money back IF Ann does the refund.

I think a power game is being played here, so we are just going to wait and see...can't actually go round to Ann's house anyway and sit her on pc to force her to do it! She keeps saying she can't be bothered with it all and refuses to do it. I can't see what the problem is...beyond power and Ann being p*****ed off that my daughter has actually stood up against her and said no more, not going. It's no skin of their noses whether she goes or not.......but it makes me cross cos it's not Ann's money it's my daughter's and she has asked and asked her, in writing, to cancel her place. Due to the law re lead travel person having control of the booking we can do nothing...which seems wrong somehow..

Either go with your daughter to the Thomas cook shop or get her to go. Tell the staff that she no longer wants to go on this holiday and wants to cancel off. Ask the TC staff to ring Ann and explain they have your daughter in the shop wanting to cancel and ask her permission to process this. The TC staff once they have her permission can deal with this. They can say to Ann if it isn't going to cost you or your friends any money shall we just do it, but if it is then we'll call you first before we do anything to the booking.
My advice to anyone booking with a group of friends if they're not the lead passenger, at time of booking when everyone is amiable to get the lead passenger to tell the staff to put in notes that if anyone on the booking wants to discuss the holiday they can and it doesn't have to just be the lead passenger in charge. In which case your daughter could have cancelled herself off sooner if there was no loss of money to the other people. But if there was to be further expense then the lead passenger needed to be consulted before anything was done to the booking.

phebe3

To put everyone in the picture.....Ann was friendly with daughter but daughter didn't want to go along with something Ann wanted to do as she couldn't really afford it and found a cheaper option. Ann doesn't like this as she liked everyone to go along with her and has bullied my daughter mercilessly over the past few months to the point where she has thrown up ( in MacDonald's car park after meeting friends, inc Ann there..and was witnessed and assisted by friends)

Re the anxiety etc, she has had it for ages..and littlereddevil I wasn't avoiding answering it just hadn't realised you wanted to know so much.....and was a lot better until recently. (all of you putting in your half pennyworth here re the mental health...I am presuming you don't know much about mental illness or stigmatise it as many do)
Re the refund and Thos Cook not discussing it, it is ON THE WEBSITE ....I also checked and she is correct. She phoned to see if there was anything she could do re the cancellation herself but Thos Cook's hands are tied as it is the law that the lead person sorts it out. My daughter is a bright girl and was aware of this, which is why she told Ann in writing she didn't feel able to go any longer on 17 May, and several times since.

Re the keeping out, she is my daughter and we try to do my best for her, and her sisters. They are independent people and manage very well in life, (two eldest have moved out and bought own houses) but occasionally when all else fails and they don't know what to do or where to go they need parent's help or advice, which is what we try to do.

Thank you so much to all of those who have posted constructive,realistic advice. I think we are going to have to sit tight then look at small claims. StephB34...yes sound advice re holiday bookings, and one I think we should all bear in mind when group booking a holiday.

If you can't be constructive then don't bother posting, I came on here for advice not criticism.

gettingtheresometime

Obviously I don't know the amounts involved but it seems there are three options open to your daughter :

1 your daughter goes on holiday - ok not really an option but it is an option
iyswim

2. You write off the money and put it down as a lesson; whether that's an expensive lesson or a cheap one is debateable

3. Your daughter writes to Ann saying that further to previous communication she no longer wishes to go on the holiday and that she requires a return of all funds due with official confirmation of the amounts returned. If she doesn't hear from Ann within 14 days then she'll take the matter to the small claims court.

A couple of things strike me though. If your daughter is 18 is she doing her a levels? If she is does she need this extra stress? If not then walking away may be the right thing for her to do.

Also from your description of Ann she shields a devious mare do could it be she's hoping to get a feebie for a different girl? If you think that's the case then it might be a good idea for your daughter to pretend to drop the matter and wait for Facebook postings to drop Ann in it.

balletshoes

3

phebe3 wrote: »

Re the refund and Thos Cook not discussing it, it is ON THE WEBSITE ....I also checked and she is correct.
She phoned to see if there was anything she could do re the cancellation herself but Thos Cook's hands are tied as it is the law that the lead person sorts it out. My daughter is a bright girl and was aware of this, which is why she told Ann in writing she didn't feel able to go any longer on 17 May, and several times since.

what is on the website? is what you have found on the website the terms and conditions for a whole booking cancellation? If it is, then that may not apply if its only your daughter who wants to cancel. As others have said, the whole holiday, for everyone else, may need to re-calculated based on under-occupancy, which may increase the costs for everyone else still going, in which case I'm not sure your daughter would expect to get much, if anything back for cancelling off the booking.

The only way this can be resolved is with Ann/Ann's mother, as they are lead on the booking. If they can't/won't look into the cancellation of one person from the booking, I'm really not sure there is very much you can do to get your money back (but I'd certainly follow stephb34s advice, that seems a logical first step if you're not getting anywhere with Ann because she can't be bothered).

Kim_kim

Op , how much has your daughter paid to Ann?

phebe3

Oh my goodness.never thought of the freebie option. No, she is a year behind (due to MH issues etc ) so has just finished A levels. Thank you for replying with your options, think we are going to have to wait and see and perhaps persue through Small Claims Court. It is the principle for me....it's no skin off Ann's nose to do this, it's a simple phone call and she had to do it last year (similar sort of thing....another girl fell out big time. We did tell daughter not to trust her etc but sometimes you can't tell people and it's no use harkin on the "I told you so" line now. Just seems a shame she won't get ANY of her money back, not even a small proportion.
(she has paid the full amount of the holiday now)
A lesson will have been learned...and a spare place is available on a flight to Malia and a hotel bed............

Andypandyboy

I think you have done as much as you can now. Someone else will take that place is my guess. Perhaps a sibling or a cousin.....

I agree OP you do sometimes have to let them learn by their own mistakes.

I am in that position now with my youngest who is at Univerity, there are some issues over who is lead tenant, who is chief bill payer etc, for the house for this coming year. I have urged caution (having been there before!) but youngest is of the opinion that "they are his friends and it won't be an issue".........;)

Kim_kim

phebe3 wrote: »

(she has paid the full amount of the holiday now).

How much was the deposit in £
How much was the top up in £
When did she pay the top up?
When did she say she didn't want to go?