Vow Renewal/Blessing

Mojisola

MrsL11 wrote: »

Exactly why I keep talking myself out of it - I don't want people to assume something has happened and that's why we want to do it.

If we worry too much about what other people might think, it stifles our own choices.

Do what you want for your own reasons.

Nicki

MrsL11 wrote: »

Exactly why I keep talking myself out of it - I don't want people to assume something has happened and that's why we want to do it.

If you tell people you'll get a whole range of reactions and you won't know in advance who will think what. Some people will be genuinely delighted and think it's a lovely idea, some will be bemused as to why you'd feel you need to do it but generally supportive, some will gossip about you and speculate that there were problems in the marriage or that it's an excuse for getting presents even if you are clear that none are expected, and some will just ignore it. Even a quick search on here will have threads where all of these views have been expressed when people have been invited to attend such events!

Having a ceremony just for the 4 of you, and not telling people, would avoid this risk, but is that what the children are expecting when they say they'd like to see you do this, and is it what you and your husband want? If one aim is to get some better wedding photos would you not want close family and friends who would have been in the original photos there too?

missbiggles1

MrsL11 wrote: »

Thank-you all. It's definitely not another wedding - just a blessing.
I am a professional wedding photographer and the photographs were taken by a 'professional' there is no helping them. Our original photographer emigrated and we were left with a week to go to source another. We settled for an older chap who had a great portfolio so no idea what happened to our photos. I wasn't a professional at that time and didn't have the contacts that I do now.

The kids who were 2 and 3 at the time are always asking us to get married again so they can remember it and I just thought that the 4 of us would be nice. No big white dress, no fuss.

Perhaps need to have a talk with the children...

missbiggles1

MrsL11 wrote: »

Hello All,

A little bit of background - Mr L and I were married 5 years ago this October. We had a lovely day, surrounded by the people we love but there are a few things that we are not so happy with. One being our wedding photographs (we were let down photographer emigrated) they are orange and grainy and I refuse to look at them never mind display them anywhere. Our two children were present at our wedding and despite this there is not one single photo of the 4 of us which is a little sad.

It's fair to say we scrimped on a few things too - my ring being one. It could really do with replacing and while Hubby has said he wants to buy me a new one I don't want to take off my original as I feel its not a wedding ring.

Long story short, I was thinking of having a small intimate vow renewal/blessing this October to celebrate 5 years and have my new ring blessed - as well as get some nice wedding style photographs including our children. We're not keen on being in the spotlight so a big re-do is a little daunting - is it possible to do this with just the 4 of us?

I get excited planning it in my head then talk myself out of it.
Thanks in advance. Mrs L xx

Why not have a lovely 5 year anniversary celebration?

poet321

It is something we talked about but didn't do because we couldn't get past the "renewal" issue for something that hasn't been broken.

Lots of people do it though, so, if having thought it through, you feel it is for you, go ahead and do it.

lincroft1710

MrsL11 wrote: »

The kids who were 2 and 3 at the time are always asking us to get married again so they can remember it and I just thought that the 4 of us would be nice. No big white dress, no fuss.

I don't remember being at my parents' wedding, but this may have been because it was 4 years before I was born.

Renewing your vows after 5 years because your children want you to or because the photographs of the original were not good or to bless a new ring, do not seem good reasons to me. It appears almost that you are starting all over again, almost a second wedding! New photos, new ring, children 5 years older.

But it's your decision, if you believe your family will be happier or closer if you go ahead with this, then do it.

After over 20 years with OH,would we be renewing our vows? Er, no, it would be rather difficult as we never married.

Georgiegirl256

On one of the vow renewal threads that was on here, someone wrote "Why? Did they not take the first time around?" I thought this was a very true statement, and I'm another one doesn't see the point in renewing vows, I've said them once, why do I need to say them again?

Marvel1

Out of curiosity to anyone, if you invited guests, would guests be expected to give a gift?

Nicki

cjdavies wrote: »

Out of curiosity to anyone, if you invited guests, would guests be expected to give a gift?

If I were invited as a guest then I think as it is a celebration, then I'd feel the need to bring something. Most people would probably feel the same even if the couple weren't overtly expecting them or even had explicitly said they didn't want any.

firebird082

I'm suprised that so many people think negatively of a renewal of vows - I think it's a lovely idea. Who cares what anyone else thinks? If it's important to you then go for it.