The financial implications of moving in together

FBaby

We each have our respective mortgages to pay. Do you consider it to be fair if he is able to pay an extra £500 a month towards his mortgage (income from renting it out) if I have no extra income towards paying mine? He will be paying half of our joint bills while he is living in my house and I will still have my mortgage to pay.

So you pay your mortgage, he pays his, and then what is left over from income is split, surely that's the fairest way?

No we sold our joint house and split the proceeds which I then put towards my new house.

So you did gain from that joint investment. Would you have been in a position to buy a property and pay the mortgage alone during that time that would have resulted in the same level of equity?

I have since been trying to overpay my new mortgage and am very careful with my money while my new partner earns more than I do and likes to spend more too.

So surely if he earns more, whilst you have more equity in your property than he that you think you should be entitled to keep, he should also be entitled to spend more of his income on himself as he wishes? You have your equity, he has his income?

To be fair, in such situation, there is never a right or wrong way. The only right one is the one you both agree is fair to you (and who cares what other things). If I was your OH, I would agree to your arrangement, but only for X number of years. I wouldn't be able to share my life with someone who deep inside cared more to protect their assets than to full commit to me, but that's how I am!

Happier_Me

I am quite surprised that some posters on here seem almost offended by the thought of someone wanting to protect their assets when relatively new in a relationship. Maybe it shows a clear divide between those who have a tendancy to rule with their hearts as opposed to their heads. Or simply individual experiences are swaying views.

I am happily married and have been for many years with hopefully many more to follow. We started very young with nothing and have both worked very hard to improve our financial position. In our early 40's if we were to divorce and split the proceeds of this hard work equally we could afford a modest home each mortgage free. Perhaps unusually for the woman, I have contributed more financially over the years and have still been responsible for the bulk of the childcare too for various reasons. I may get a large inheritance in the future whereas DH will get very little. My pension is much more generous than DH's. Given our history though I see this as all joint assets and I would have no issues splitting this equally between us on divorce.

I say this to put into context the fact that if I were to find myself single I would absolutely be in the camp of protecting my assets in a new relationship. Maybe for some of you £180k (my half of our current net assets in property and cash) is easily come by but for me it certainly hasn't been and this money represents a foundation for financial stability for me and my children. I would not risk this in the early years of a new relationship and maybe not ever. It may not be the most romantic of views but surely this is the most sensible!

Saying all that the OP should absolutely contribute 'rent' of some kind to her other half and maybe the fairest way to do that is to calculate the net financial benefit of renting out her house (which is only possible through her moving in with her partner) and splitting this in half. As they both have a mortgage to pay this should be ignored for this calculation but tax, landlord insurance and other annual costs should be taken into consideration. I would also exclude costs of maintaining the property as this will still be hers and hers alone.