No children at wedding

pleasedelete

The wedding ceremony is public. Anyone with children can attend. You can chose not to have them at the reception

burnoutbabe

Judi wrote: »

You either allow children to come or you dont. You cant handpick what children you want and dont want. Your going to find yourself very unpopular if you do.

Nonsense, its quite common for say family children to be invited but not friends children. You probably would not say cousin's bob kids can come but Cousin fred's can not but you can distinguish a bit. And if you want to invite certain friends kids and not others you definately can if you want, its just harder to explain WHY if someone asks why their kids are not invited.

glentoran99

Judi wrote: »

You either allow children to come or you dont. You cant handpick what children you want and dont want. Your going to find yourself very unpopular if you do.

If you dont want children at your wedding and the family cant find childminders i dont expect you will have many people attend,

Of course you can. same way you can pick what guests you want,

cashewnut

pleasedelete wrote: »

The wedding ceremony is public. Anyone with children can attend. You can chose not to have them at the reception

In theory they can attend (as could a passerby off the street) but it would be the height of bad manners to bring children if they weren't invited. A lot of venues have capacity restrictions too; my venue's was 60.

Spendless

When I was a child, if a wedding invite arrived saying 'Mr and Mrs Smith, Kathy and Jemima' we knew we were all going. If the invite said 'Mr and Mrs Smith' it was just Mum and Dad.

Somehow, in recent years, this simple explanation seems to have been lost. My last 2 wedding evening invites, stated me and husband. We made arrangements for children to be looked after. When we got to the reception bride and groom on both occasions first question to us was 'haven't you brought the children?

Person_one

no1catman wrote: »

Why not mark it as 'adults only'!

Because it isn't!

Its perfectly ok to invite your nieces and nephews but not your cousins children. Some extended families are massive, you have to draw the line somewhere! Its not about adults or children, its about closeness of relationship.

OP, some weddings I've been to included a card to RSVP with what meal option you wanted. That seems like a pretty clear way to avoid accidental guests.

DinkyLass

cashewnut wrote: »

In theory they can attend (as could a passerby off the street) but it would be the height of bad manners to bring children if they weren't invited. A lot of venues have capacity restrictions too; my venue's was 60.

You're spot on there...I've heard plenty of stories where a wedding has been classed as adults only, but some people don't think the rules apply to their little cherubs and have brought the kids along anyway!
Plus, for those people who always say 'children make a wedding'...have you ever seen a bride trying to hold back tears after some little angel has spilled a purple fruit shoot down her dress while the parents laugh it off and say 'kids will be kids!'...not a pretty sight!


As for the OP - your wedding = your rules!
I'm guessing you'll be paying for the vast majority of the day so you can pick and choose your guests in line with your budget. If people don't like it, tough!

Andrew_Ryan_89

I think what I may end up doing is allowing only my direct cousins to bring their children but ask individually if they can keep them all in check. I have been to a few weddings and the children are just constantly crying and acting up with the parents doing little to nothing. We were at a birthday party for someone's 60th (funny enough, her son who recently got married done an entire blanket ban on children) and my niece kept shouting out and asking to sing "Let it Go". My brother was just sitting there smiling and not doing anything.

I just have to make it clear that if the children start crying or something, especially during the ceremony, then they have to take them outside.

Person_one

Andrew_Ryan_89 wrote: »

I think what I may end up doing is allowing only my direct cousins to bring their children but ask individually if they can keep them all in check.

Oh god don't do that! I can't think of a quicker way to get a parent's back up than to suggest they don't know how to manage/control their children.

Get the vicar/registrar to make a little announcement welcoming the children and [STRIKE]telling[/STRIKE] letting the parents know they can pop out the back door if the little ones find it hard to keep quiet for the whole ceremony.

lewishardwick

It's not a wedding unless there's child vomiting in the corner from too many profiteroles, and one wired on caffeine sprinting round the dance floor...

BOO!