Official Trying to Conceive - Thread 13

Rachylou1981

firebird082 wrote: »

Oh Rachy, it sounds to me like you're pinning so much hope on this. Is there any way you can focus in a different direction at all? Did you manage to enjoy the good weather at the weekend?

I don't think I am any different to everyone here to be honest, hopeful that I get my BFP soon.

I am keeping busy however, meeting friends at every opportunity and me and OH are house hunting as well as planning short breaks away. This is helping me cope with my sadness and anxiety.

clarabell1984

Aw Rachy, I hope you managed to enjoy at least a bit of your weekend and good weather. I really can't offer much advice as I haven't ever been through what you have. Maybe your friend is the same, I think I may have said a similar thing to you as I'm not very good with words. I'm sure she wasn't trying to be rude or upset you. Everybody deals with emotions in different ways. Keeping busy sounds like a good plan! xx

Firebird, I know what you mean about babies everywhere! My sister-in-law being pregnant really doesn't help either. I actually said to my hubby last night, they don't know what it feels like to TTC! They were lucky to catch NTNP before their set date to start TTC! Sorry you are CD1

But with them, my feeling of resentment is certainly starting to fade as I try to think positive about being an auntie

I'm CD52 & 9DPO (hopefully) and have successfully managed to refrain from POAS! We did some decorating at the weekend which helped with the 2WW. I've been trying not to SS but tbh I don't seem to have any apart from slightly sore n*pples (sorry TMI).

My acupuncturist thinks AF should arrive by Thursday/Friday if I've not conceived and did actually ovulate. I don't feel confident that we have caught so just hoping AF comes then I can make a decision if i'm going to start Clomid next cycle.

Feeling quite positive but feel it may be a whole new ball game come the weekend if no BFP or AF.

Hope everyone is well xxxx

Rachylou1981

Oh don't get me wrong folks, I am not upset at any comments. I know emotions run high here and regardless of what is said, I never take offence and don't wish to cause any to others either. I know everyone is trying their best to be supportive and cope with their own situation

I also think that with any situation (TTC, MC, IVF etc), not many know the right thing to say - is there such a thing? But I think some things should be common sense not to say (not talking about anyone on this thread). For example, I have had someone say "At least you were not further on". How awful is that? :eek::mad: I was a bit speechless and felt I had to defend just how awful it was and still is

Just wanted to clarify, my comments about being upset over AF arrival were not because I haven't fallen this cycle, more because it's a reminder that my baby is gone hence emotions all over the place. Not sure if my earlier comments made it sound like I was hoping to be pregnant immediately.

clarabell1984

Rachylou1981 wrote: »

For example, I have had someone say "At least you were not further on". How awful is that? :eek::mad: I was a bit speechless and felt I had to defend just how awful it was and still is

Now that is terrible

Before I was diagnosed with PCOS, those close who knew we were TTC kept telling me "everything will be fine, I'll just be stress that you haven't had a period for so long" This really upset me because how did they know everything would be fine?! Then when I told them about the PCOS they were shocked and said " we really did just think it was stress"

newthrift

Two Week Wait (BFP Hopefuls)
CD52 clarabell1984 - 9DPO :cool:
CD52 freshstart11 - 16DPO :cool:
"If in doubt - BD" Zone
CD11 LottieLou - Awaiting ov
CD11 angel11 - Awaiting ov
CD13 midget_1907 - Awaiting ov
CD17 newthrift - Awaiting ov
CD22 athensgeorgia - Awaiting ov
CD25 easilydistracted - Awaiting ov
CD28 Keekee - Awaiting ov
CD28 Milliebob - Awaiting ov
"Wine and Chocolate" zone
CD1 firebird082 - Awaiting ov
CD3 ButterflyBabe -Awaiting ov
Those we haven't heard from in a while
CD74 Alex_88 - Awaiting ov
CD77 little angel - Awaiting ov
CD108 Slinky_Selina - Awaiting ov
CD123 the_insider - Awaiting ov

Those with * sometimes uses conceive plus/preseed.
The names in blue has a link to their Fertility Friend chart.
When posting updates, can you please do them in Magenta so it's easy to spot. This thread is all about support, so remember to click thanks on as many posts as you can! It makes us all feel loved.

For those posting on smartphones or tablets the code for magenta is
([ )COLOR="magenta"( ] )your text ( [ )/COLOR ( ] ) (lose the round bracket)

Please let me know if anything needs editing (including the zone you are in) and I will try to keep up.

Thread Graduates
Cats2012 BFP 9/7/16
big5 BFP 15/6/16
sexymouse BFP 4/6/16
VicVics BFP 16/5/16
MancMama4 BFP 29/4/16
pinkpetal BFP 24/4/16
Apple1985 BFP 19/4/16
Tinks05 BFP 18/4/16

newthrift

rachylou I don't blame you for feeling hurt/upset by your friends comments, however I'm certain that it wasn't intentional. Unless someone has been through it they can't fully appreciate all the emotion that goes with it xx hugs xx The person who said 'well at least you weren't further along' - I too have heard this :mad: Yes ok I hadn't got a nursery all set up BUT you still loved that baby so much and it doesn't matter if you were 4weeks or 39weeks your loss/sadness and hurt and emotion is equally as valid!!!

The closer we get to 1st beans due date the harder I am finding seeing newborns/pregnant ladies and pregnancy announcements. I have always wanted to be a mum and have babies but until the losses I have never felt such a pull in my gut for it to happen. Really hoping it's our time soon!!

A0503 I have taken you off the list, but of course you must still come on here to chat I completely know where you are coming from with needing to take the step back. It's not nice when you feel like it's taking over your whole life.

Sorry I didn't get on to do the list yesterday, I was busy enjoying the sunshine It's nice to see summer seems to finally have arrived, defiantly makes things feel a bit better.

angel11

Rachy & Clara what inconsiderate & hurtful comments, some people must not think before they say anything. Before we were ttc, I once had an old work colleague ask if I was pg yet - when I told her no she replied "what's wrong ... are you sure you're doing it right?" :mad::mad::mad:

I truly believe that nothing in this ttc game is easy. I've a close friend who is pg with her 2nd lo who's had several miscarriages, and we got the news at the weekend that another friend's baby was born sleeping. Both of these friends seemed to fall pg quite easily/quickly, & if I'm honest, I guess I probably was a little jealous of them. But it's made me realise that everyone has their own individual battle they're fighting, and just because someone falls pg easily, it doesn't mean that things are plain sailing for them.

I hope those ladies who are finding things tough right now can find a way through that works for them, & everyone take care of yourselves x

Rachylou1981

Thanks for all the lovely comments and support.

It really is shocking some of the comments people say.

Newshrift, I know it wasn't meant to be funny given the situation but I did giggle at your comment about the nursery being set up. I do completely agree with you though and I also know that no-one means to upset me, I guess it's just surprising to hear some of the things people think are okay to say.

Angel, I also agree about no-one knowing what people are going through. Whilst it seems we are all experiencing jealousy, you never know what is going on behind closed doors. This is what I try to think of when people announce their news.

In other news, I seem to have picked up a UTI. Feel yucky

cats2012

Hi all - just sending some hugs!! I have definitely learnt that you can't know what people are going through - the number of stories I have heard of miscarriage, still birth, ivf etc etc since we started ttc has really shocked me, and also opened my eyes.

So many end in happiness though. I've learnt to accept that my "plan" didn't work out (I could technically have had a 6m old by now) but that things will work out in the end. It's so so hard sometimes but I truly do have faith.

newthrift

Rachylou oooo no hope it clears up quickly!!! Cranberry juice at the ready! I think sometimes you just have to try and find something to laugh at in a bad situation - glad the nursery thing made you chuckle