What are your relationships with your siblings like?

System

I'm the oldest of 4, who are 6, 9 and 10 years younger than me.

As a kid the age gap was honestly too big for me to have any kind of relationship with them, they were kids, i was heading in teenage years. i moved out for uni at 18 and although i tried to go back as often as i could (i;d pick them up from school and get them sweets from the sweet shop) i feel as though i missed out a lot on them growing up. Now we're all adults and although we now get on better, i still feel quite distant to them. My sisters are best friends and my brother goes to the same uni as younger sister so there's been times the three of them meet up or go home and i'm not a part of it

I honestly wish i was closer to them, though i accept on my part i need to make more effort to talk to them. I remember telling my mum i felt left out and that we weren't close and she told me that i just need to talk to them more

All that said we recently went to a family wedding and it was wonderful, for the first time in a long time i felt involved and like one of the family. I had one sister doing my hair, the other doing my nails and my brother was a laugh to talk to.

I think i just need to stop putting up barriers but its hard sometimes with being the (much older) sibling and not being there for a lot of their lives.

pigpen

I know that feeling messedup.. I'm a lot older than my siblings and they have days out and BBQs and go out for dinner etc and I don't get invited.. it is really hurtful sometimes. I am 6, 8, 10 and 16 years older.. but I still know if I need their help, they would be there. My other 2 sisters 10 and 14 years younger hate each other so don't have that close relationship either.. we rarely see each other.. one works FT and hates children, I can't do evenings and the younger one is a molly-coddled slob who spends all day in bed and 'can't do anything' .. so our available times are severely limited too.

I was definitely more 'parent' than 'siblings' .. doing bath times and bed and cooking and school runs..

olgadapolga

I'm the third child of four - I have a brother much, much older than me, a sister two years older and a sister two years younger.

See my brother occasionally, no issues with relationship, just life happening. Always pleased to see him but he makes no effort to get in touch and I got bored of doing all the running, TBH.

I detest both of my sisters and haven't spoken/seen either of them for over fifteen years. If I never see them again it'll be too soon. They made my childhood a living hell, always ganging up on me and being nasty (and being allowed to behave like this). I spent a lot of my childhood and adolescence alone, as my brother was off doing what men do. But that's okay, as I learned how NOT to behave from my horrible sisters. Sad really, but there it is.

I feel absolutely no remorse for cutting my sisters out of my life, despite mutterings from other family members. But, even if I did decide to "make up" with them, it would never work as the issues would always be there. And from what I've heard about them, neither has changed and they would still make my life a living hell. I prefer not to have that sort of toxicity in my life; I am a happier person for not having them as part of my existence. It also means that I get out of those really mortifying family occasions where I try my best to avoid speaking to anyone. I really don't like my family.

Bryando

I have 8 with me being the oldest. Rarely see them and keep in contact via social media weekly on/off. My sister had a child and never seen said child or her for around two years. Not bothered at all with it as I am my own man. They know where why door is.
The rest of the family I speak with my mum/dad few times a month over the phone. Again not bothered.

UKTigerlily

I have a Brother who is 5 years younger. He lives about 30 miles away and drives, I don't, but has never been here (i've lived here for 10yrs and he has for 7 months).

I've spoken to him twice on the phone in the last 7 years and if I message him on Facebook to ask for photos of the kids, he usually sees it and totally ignores it, or sends them without a word

I have NO idea why he is like it, but it seems to be with all of the family, though he appears to get on with my Sis in Laws. He wouldn't help me if my life depended on it and doesn't care at all

robin_banks

Have a sister, we don't really speak much, haven't done for about 20 years.