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Government petition to make the parent receiving child maintenance provide receipts
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What's the going rate for giving cuddles these days?0
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As long as the money is being used to benefit the child/children in question then that is all I am saying. You could not start arguin about what shops they shop at that would be controlling and if anyone actually did that then they need their heads looked at. Again my point is that child maintenance should be spent on the child or directly benefit the child involved. To start trying to control what is bought is not and nor will it ever be what this is about.0
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Obviously? What's obvious about it?
Let's take a look at expenses. - you said children, so i'll guess two - but feel free to correct.
Rent - total £500-800 as an average
Council Tax - £140 as an average
Utilities - £150 as an average
TV Licence - £12
Internet - £15 (this may not be applicable)
Food - £200-300
Clothes - £40
Shoes - £20
Clubs - ? Upto £50
And if the children have a lifestyle at anything above subsistence level
Transport
Haircuts
School trips
Birthday party
Leisure activities (swimming lessons, dancing, football training etc)
Treats- days out (zoo, theme park, swimming, iceskating, panto)
Electronics PC. tablet , toys , comics, books (I wouldn't say internet is only a possibility in this day and age btw as schools have the expectation kids will have internet at home for homework)
So the minimum - is £1127. Now of course you shouldn't subsidise your exes living costs, so let's knock a 1/3 off. - That's £743.82 a month for the bare minimum.
I would argue your ex is liable to half of that, but you said an I quote: rest assured it is enough for my children to live comfortably and have clothes, shoes, food, gas,electric etc
So is it?
I do wonder that so many NRPs seem to forget what is normal to spend on a child as soon as they depart the family homeI Would Rather Climb A Mountain Than Crawl Into A Hole
MSE Florida wedding .....no problem0 -
As long as the money is being used to benefit the child/children in question then that is all I am saying. You could not start arguin about what shops they shop at that would be controlling and if anyone actually did that then they need their heads looked at. Again my point is that child maintenance should be spent on the child or directly benefit the child involved. To start trying to control what is bought is not and nor will it ever be what this is about.
Luckily this idea is a non starter. But I am curious how anyone would implement it.
Food shopping, a receipt each? Cos one kid loves Coco pops and one has weetabix.
Gas and electric? Divided by amount of people in the home? What happens when you make a meal for everyone in say a slow cooker?
Clothes, I don't know if this always happens but at a certain age,my daughter wore a lot of my clothes. This lasted a couple of years. Should maybe split the cost in half?
Washing of said clothes, only wash own clothes all at same temperature with exact amount of washing powder?
Toilet paper usage. Big can of worms open there.
If some nrp is so bothered what exactly is spent on their child, they should take control and become RP instead. See how they would like to defend their spending habits.63 mortgage payments to go.
Zero wins 2016 😥0 -
It does seem to me that many NRPs say they would like to have the children living with them but can't usually because their working hours don't allow it.
I had this conversation with my ex -I offered a genuine 50/50 split but he refused (after first thinking it was a great idea and then thinking about what it would mean) on the grounds it would disrupt his career as he travelled for work (fairly infrequently) and often had to work late to meet deadlines. When I suggested he considered changing jobs to something with more family friendly hours to facilitate the arrangement he was horrified. In contrast once he left I had to quit my full-time prestigious job to take a job with more child friendly hours to enable me to be a PWC. This seems to still be society's norm - that the PWC (typically the mother ) is expected to make those "adjustments" but the (usually but not always male) NRP should not be expected to make similar adjustments just because they are a parent - even if it means they could then have the child living with them for more time each week.
We still have a long way to go it seems.I Would Rather Climb A Mountain Than Crawl Into A Hole
MSE Florida wedding .....no problem0 -
If I was giving the opportunity to have my children on a permanent basis I would not hesitate for a second. I fully understand how much financially it costs to cloth, feed etc a child/children. I have one question! Do you believe that it is ok for child maintenance to be spent on funding a rp's social life without the children's involvement? My point in the grand scheme of things is that as long as child maintenance is being spent on something that is directly benefiting the child/children then there is no problem but when it is not being spent on the child/children that's when something needs to be done!0
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Are your children going 'without' anything that you feel your Ex should provide?
Anyhow, it's a pointless argument without a fully itemised household income and expenditure breakdown and I'm sure she's not going to be prepared to supply you with audited accounts as she's not running a business0 -
I do understand the point people are making about how it would be near on impossible to implement giving the fact that so many details would have to recorded and in hindsight receipts would probably not work as it would be a long and drawn out process and also as a couple of people have mentioned certain nrp would see it as an opportunity to control(although as I said this would never be acceptable in any situation). The only thing and I am probably repeating myself is I believe that 100% of child maintenance should be spent on the child/children in question or directly benefit them and not be spent on things that do not benefit the child/children.0
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Yes I think that it's fine to spend on socialising away from the children.
on top of that - since you pay enough to fund their lifestyle fully, you cannot know at all what money is spent on what.
Let's assume you pay £1000 a month, and the total household bills are £1500 per month.
of course a family will have money left over after paying the £500 difference, either from government support of from her new partner.0 -
I'm not arguing or disputing what they spend their own money on whether that be earned or benefits. My point is child maintenance is for the child/children and should not be used for anything other than benefitting the child. It's like going to work and your boss saying "I've took £20 off your wages this week so I can have a drink" no that would be unacceptable as that's your money just as in child maintenance is the "child's" money to be used to benefit them!!0
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