Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

System

Torry i am so so sorry for your loss there are no words. you're in my thoughts and i hope you have someone with you. *massive hugs* please let us know if we can do anything to help. i know we;ve never met but i want to give you a really big hug right now I'm sorry x

dekaspace

Relative has yet again begged me for cash, despite knowing I had my esa assessment Monday and I am getting over a severe cold.

Quite upset really.

onomatopoeia99

So sorry for you loss Torry

calleyw

Torry massive hugs

Be kind to yourself and look after yourself. I knows its hard as its knocked you side wards.


Yours

Calley X

Pyxis

Torry, I hope you managed to get some sleep last night.

I'm glad your friend has come to be with you. He/she will be a source of strength for you, I'm sure.

We're all thinking of you and sending you supporting vibes. . :A

jobbingmusician

Oh Torry, thinking of you so much. Keep posting and do let us know if there is anything we can do xxxxxx

whitewing

So sorry Torry. Thinking of you often.



Also, please don't anybody be guilt tripped into lending money that you can't afford to lose. It is perfectly okay to say no, however desperate someone sounds.


Hope everyone is as well as individual circumstances currently allow.

itsanne

I'm not on MSE often these days, but have just seen your news, Torry. I'm very sorry to hear it. My husband died very suddenly and unexpectedly just over a year ago, so I understand the utter shock and disbelief you are experiencing. Please feel free to message me if you would find it helpful. I'm with friends in the US for the next ten days, but I'll make a point of checking in. Please make sure you accept any help offered. My thoughts are with you.

Pyxis

Thinking of you, Tory. :A

whitewing wrote: »

Also, please don't anybody be guilt tripped into lending money that you can't afford to lose. It is perfectly okay to say no, however desperate someone sounds.

This forum if chock full of people asking how they can get money back from people they've lent it to, relatives and 'close' friends.

Dozens and dozens of people.


The advice has always, always been: if you are going to lend someone money, treat it in your own mind as an outright gift.

If you then do get the money back, it's a bonus.

If you can't afford, or don't want to consider it as being a gift, then DON'T LEND IT.

If you lose a friend as a result, then it screams heaps about what sort of friend they are, and just what would have happened to your money.


As a very, very bare minimum, if you really, really must lend it, get it all in writing, with the exact amount and date lent, and crucially, when repayment is expected, and whether in full or in instalments,and if the latter, when those instalments are to be made.
Factor in interest as well. Makes it more 'official' even if it isn't much, and proves it was never meant to be a gift.

And get two copies signed and witnessed.
And each party keep an original copy.

Ok, even with it in writing, you still stand a good chance of losing the money, but at least there can be no argument about it being a loan and what is expected. and if you go to the small claims court, it will be proof of intent.

It still stands, though, that if you cannot think of the loan as a gift, then don't loan it.

Torry_Quine

Another horrible day. Saw the pastor and the undertaker. I'm not sleeping much at all and it's a struggle to eat