Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

codemonkey

Pyxis wrote: »

Don't call your teacher friend a skunk!
Or his wife a python!

:rotfl:

Seriously, I didn't know you were going to be seeing animals!



I haven't cuddled a skunk. Do you stink now? :rotfl:

I have cuddled a python, though! And have the pic to prove it!



We want pics! We want pics!


(Am still annoyed that the character only has six tentacles. :mad: Either she lost two in a bar-room brawl, or she's a mutant, Disney-style! :mad:
It's like when cartoonists only give spiders six legs. :mad: THEN THEY AIN't SPIDIES, dumbo! They is insects!)



However many legs, WE WANT PICS,

Well, she does have arms so maybe those are the other 2?

I have also cuddled a python. I love snakes.

Anyone who needs cheering up and likes puppies. Here is a link to a video of some adorable EBT puppies doing puppy stuff. shouldn't be triggery at all but some other articles might be, so be careful if you go exploring.

elsien

Car broke down at work. Missed Gitdog's gold award, decided to console myself with a rare takeaway. Picked the only Chinese takeaway in town that doesn't do sweet and sour pork. Not amused.

faerielight

hi guys, I have much better news today! I got a reply from the apology email I sent the manager, it said this: "(Penguined just in case)



I" do hope you are feeling better, Just to Clarify you will not be loosing your care package with us as an agency however if an incident arises again I will have to speak to social services to put your calls as 2 carers instead of one

You personally have not done ayt thing wrong and I am full aware of your illnesses and this can cause you to be tearful and anxious this is not how I wish for you to feel I'm hoping now with the call times later this will reassure you that you do not need to miss any appointment a not feel you have to rush around."

I am so relieved! the stupid thing is, this rift now with my friend has triggered the voice in my head of my mother, telling me my friend is right and it is all my fault.. even reading the email, logical mind says it wasn't my fault, but emotional mind says it is... I have got a lot of work to do on my dynamics and core issues!I'm not sure whether to forward the email onto my friend and hope it mends the rift, but I think she will still blame me and be angry with me. I Can't see her burying the hatchet anytime soon, and that is so painful and so hard to tolerate.
The only problems with me that she flagged up are that my cats have fleas and are biting the carers and I have to pay for a light on my doorstep.

That said, I went to the centre today and I stayed from 12 to 6pm, I pushed myself way past my physical capacity and I know I will pay for it having to do enforced bed rest, but I really challenged my social and agoraphobia today, I stayed on 1 table, people came and went and I had some really good chats,and challenged myself to stay put and colour even when I was the only one at the table., I think I did get chatted up though by a guy, he asked for my number, and I didn't feel able to say no, then he hugged me and said that I smelt devine. I really don't want to make friend with anyone outside of the centre, appart from a close friend who goes there who I was friends with for 2 years before I went there. I want to contain my relationships with members inside the centre, so I feel awkward about the guy. But I am proud of myself that I'm joining in and challenging my safety net radius! Yay, go me

whitewing

Bless you, faerie. I am proud of you. I would have sat on the email reply for days being too scared to look at it.

I wouldn't bother forwarding the email to your friend. Leave it all for a few days. You may not get the response you are looking for.

Very well done on the table conversations. You are doing beautifully.

faerielight

Oh Whitewing, thank you so much for your encouragement :)and Pyxis too..I was bricking it about getting a reply and I left my mobile at home today so I couldn't check!!'m so relieved about my care, the manager seems to have calmed down by the tone of the email, I'm so desperately worried about my friendship with her.. She once sut me off for 2 years , I couldn't bear it if she did t again, with BPD, it's so hard to tolerate rejection and people we love being angry.But thanks for the lovely words is there anything that has helped you over the years with those core BPD issues and dynamics that are entrenched? The centre told me today that they are going to run an interpersonal skills group, which I def want to do. They said it covers things such as feeling responsible , taking blame and saying sorry when you haven't done anything wrong, it should be really helpful. I want to do the STEPS course too, and schema group but they don't deem me stable enough at the mo to to them.

whitewing

From a quick brainstorm:

taking anti-d's regularly, and being aware when I need to get them increased

being less available to people who make me feel stressed, mostly family members. Accepting they are not going to behave how I want them to (this takes time and a lot of practise)

being kind to myself - again, practise treating yourself like you would your best friend. I beat myself up too much but would give good advice to a friend in the same situation!

for me, having time to myself at the end of the day to think things through (DH and littlewing are there but I need time to chill and think things through or I get irritable)

getting enough sleep is a huge help for me

I am now taking a daily dose of vitamin D (well, a multivitamin). I do feel that is making a difference

I am still really surprised that people like me when I haven't seen them for a few days. Understanding that other people don't have that decline in feelings helps.

Not responding to the person straight away if a situation upsets me. Allowing myself time to plan a response and stating that I need to think about how I will do something.

Saying no/not overcommitting to things

noticing little joyful things (I used to notice them but dismiss them too quickly)

making the effort to recover a situation eg sending an explanatory email (not always an apology). I may escalate a situation so quickly that it ends abruptly but there is usually a follow up that I think of and can make an effort to do. Then I will often - but not always - get some kind of nice comment back that makes me feel appreciated for my efforts.

mostly it is about practise

Waves_and_Smiles

Faerie, I am so proud of you right now and I mean that in a totally non-patronising way. You have done great!

Hahaha Pyxis! I didn't know I was going to see animals either, it was surprise! I don't smell of skunk luckily but he still had his scent glands so could have sprayed if he wanted to!

Ouchie, I ache but hopefully should be able to talk about my time away tomorrow!

This happened-



and this-



also this-



I was over the moon!

(Let me know if anyone needs me to hide Monty the python. He was only a baby and very sweet and harmless)

tea_lover

Awwww...... skunk!! Looks like you had an amazing time WaS!

Izadora

Faerie, well done for pushing yourself and I hope you don't suffer too much for it. The interpersonal skills group sounds great.

WW, although it was in response to Faerie, thank you. A lot of those are things which I should probably try to do more and seeing it written down that succinctly is a massive help.

WaS, that skunk is so cute!! It's hard to believe that something so sweet looking has the potential to smell so bad. I was in Minnesota years ago and a skunk had scented near our cabin, it was not pleasant!!

Yay for that fact that it's pretty much the weekend. Not so much yay for the fact that I'm working tomorrow and, due to no available laptops, have to come into the office rather than being able to log on from home so don't even get a bit of a lie in

whitewing

Phew! It's busy at work at the moment. Can't get a minute free to actually do anything!