Unmotivated son!

Jagraf

ibizafan wrote: »

My youngest son only did the minimum of work at his grammar school, and no amount of nagging, cajoling or threatening worked. He was immune to bribes of any kind, but managed to pull himself together just before his A levels. He could have done better, but he is now 31, with a degree, a masters degree, and a good job as an accountant in Australia. I sometimes wonder why I ever worried about him!

At some point your commitment will have registered with him x

missbiggles1

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Through some amazing trick, my wife managed to get one GCSE in Maths (didn't sit any others), landed a place on a nursing course... and now she's a Senior Sister in an A&E department.

Stuff can happen with poor qualifications but you need a direction in life to get you where you want to be.

The key part of motivating kids must be giving them a direction, some aspiration and goals.

That must have been a while ago, it wouldn't happen these days.

missbiggles1

jaydeeuk1 wrote: »

I didn't know what I wanted to do at school. I just chose some a levels from subjects I enjoyed like physics, business studies and french. My parents rewarded me for trying my best rather than achieving a certain grade. Its what I'll be teaching my kids, there's no point trying to bust a gut and missing out on life trying to achieve A* across the board, I'd rather they enjoy themselves and get 'good enough' grades to do whatever they want to do next. Can't stand all these teary eyed teenages who think they've failed their pushy parents because they got a 'B'. I went to Derby uni, if you have a pulse you'll be accepted for pretty much any course, ballsing up a levels or GCSE's isn't the end of the world.

Many people would want more for their kids than that!

Savvy_Sue

missbiggles1 wrote: »

There are precious few things you can go into without at least 5 GCSEs grade C and above - if he doesn't get these (now or later) he'll be closing lots of doors and wrecking his working life before it's even begun.

I always told the boys: your GCSE results will not matter very much at all for most of your life, but for about five minutes they will matter very much indeed ...

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Through some amazing trick, my wife managed to get one GCSE in Maths (didn't sit any others), landed a place on a nursing course... and now she's a Senior Sister in an A&E department.

Stuff can happen with poor qualifications but you need a direction in life to get you where you want to be.

The key part of motivating kids must be giving them a direction, some aspiration and goals.

I agree with missbiggles, it wouldn't happen now, you'd have to at least do an access course or re-take the GCSEs. And yes, stuff can happen with poor qualifications, but it's a heck of a lot simpler just to get the basics under your belt when you're 16. Trick is to convince a teenager of that ...

missbiggles1 wrote: »

That must have been a while ago, it wouldn't happen these days.

Agree.

FBaby

I agree with missbiggles, it wouldn't happen now, you'd have to at least do an access course or re-take the GCSEs. And yes, stuff can happen with poor qualifications, but it's a heck of a lot simpler just to get the basics under your belt when you're 16. Trick is to convince a teenager of that ...

Indeed, that is the trick, but the reality is that we are very lucky that the system allow us a second chance. It might mean double the work to do so, but if the issue is motivation, than it might still be right to do it all when the person actually want to.

I would much rather teach my child that it is never too late, however, the longer the harder it will be, than to tell them that if they don't succeed there and then, they are ruining their future for ever.

Doing an access course is no big deal, only an extra year of studying. What's that in the scheme of things if one day you realise that you really want to become a nurse and put everything into it.

missbiggles1

FBaby wrote: »

Indeed, that is the trick, but the reality is that we are very lucky that the system allow us a second chance. It might mean double the work to do so, but if the issue is motivation, than it might still be right to do it all when the person actually want to.

I would much rather teach my child that it is never too late, however, the longer the harder it will be, than to tell them that if they don't succeed there and then, they are ruining their future for ever.

Doing an access course is no big deal, only an extra year of studying. What's that in the scheme of things if one day you realise that you really want to become a nurse and put everything into it.

Except it's a year without an income which makes it unviable for many students.

IME, the only people who could afford to study an Access course full time were those at the bottom range of the age scale whose parents were still prepared to support them, lone parents with very young children claiming IS and those whose working partner earned enough that a second income wasn't necessary.

That's an awful lot of people for whom doing an Access course was a very big deal indeed.

Person_one

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Except it's a year without an income which makes it unviable for many students.

IME, the only people who could afford to study an Access course full time were those at the bottom range of the age scale whose parents were still prepared to support them, lone parents with very young children claiming IS and those whose working partner earned enough that a second income wasn't necessary.

That's an awful lot of people for whom doing an Access course was a very big deal indeed.

Realistically, those are the only people who will be able to do nursing at all once the bursary is gone.

missbiggles1

Person_one wrote: »

Realistically, those are the only people who will be able to do nursing at all once the bursary is gone.

I haven't kept up to date with the recent changes - will student nurses be any worse off than other degree students?

Person_one

missbiggles1 wrote: »

I haven't kept up to date with the recent changes - will student nurses be any worse off than other degree students?

Not in terms of how much they receive in loan payments, they will be on the same finance package as someone studying English Literature or History, but those students don't work 40 hour weeks of varying shifts on hospital wards for 50% of their course which impacts massively on their ability to do other paid work to support themselves through the three years.

Nursing and other health professions (who are also losing the bursary) traditionally attract more mature students than most other courses. They often have caring responsibilities, mortgages, and other commitments that will make them think twice about going ahead now that they'll be incurring so much debt. The sort of options that these people could take if they were doing English or History (OU, part time courses etc) are not a possibility.

[Deleted User]

missbiggles1 wrote: »

That must have been a while ago, it wouldn't happen these days.

And it wouldn't have happened at all if my missus wasn't highly motivated to be a nurse.

When I was 16, I was really motivated to get to uni. I didn't quite know what I wanted to do but I knew uni was the way for it to happen.

My boys are a few years off being teenagers, but I know that ensuring they are motivated and engaged is one of the best things I can do for them as a parent.