Someone in work is pushing my buttons (Rant)

breaking_free

Call her out on her debt. "Frankly I'm not prepared to extend you any favours because you've owed me £200 since <insert date here>. I'm still waiting for you to pay me back."

The reason rude people get away with their behaviour is because too many people say "I won't make an issue of it. Other people will eventually notice she's a bad egg". Why wait for "eventually"? Get this sorted now so that you don't have to waste any of your energy fretting over it.

I can recall several occasions where right-minded people have done me a huge service by forewarning me to another person's rotten behaviour rather than letting me waste months figuring it out for myself. Step in and sort her out now.

Pollycat

I think you've made several mistakes.
I can't comprehend any circumstances under which I would pay £200 for another person's clothes.
Especially when you knew she had a history of getting out of paying for things.

I can't understand why you allowed her back in your life when she joined the same company as you.

yvonne13 wrote: »

Last week I can't remember the exact day she asked me if I could give her a lift home as her car was getting it's MOT. (She lives on the other side of town and I don't go anywhere near her direction) So all I said was how did you get work and her reply was the bus, so I asked her if she bought a return ticket and the words that came out of her mouth made me grab my invisible pearls.

That night I left work at 5:30pm and it was raining heavy. I hand on heart did not see her at the bus stop, but that didn't stop her going around telling any and everyone that would listen that I refused to give her a lift in my fancy new jeep because I think I'm better than her.....

What exactly did she say when you had to 'grab your invisible pearls'?
When she asked you for a lift, why didn't you just point out that you live in the opposite direction to her?

yvonne13 wrote: »

Again today she came over to where I was and started talking loud saying that some people think their better than some of us not wanting to give riff raff people lifts. I bit my lip, but it's really getting on my nerves. How long to I have to put up with her sly comments?!?!

If it were me, I'd just say 'Oh, are you referring to me? Because if you are, maybe people would be interested to know that we live in opposite directions. and that's why I don't offer you a lift' and let your colleaugues choose sides from there.

It's really up to you how long you put up with her sly comments.
Only you know what your colleagues are like and whether they are likely to be swayed by this person.

FBaby

Why oh why did you decide to be friendly with her again knowing how she used you before? Sorry but I can't comprehend how anyone would be able to forgive and forget someone like that. Knowing I was about to have to work with her again, I would have stayed away and just kept to polite professional conversation, nothing else.

As things stand, all you can do is go back one step and act as above. Ignore her attitude, as others have said, people will quickly realise what she is like.

belfastgirl23

If challenged in front of someone I'd be inclined to say something like 'I was surprised that you expected me to, I live in the opposite direction, I'd never ask anyone to go miles out of their way to give me a lift' and leave it at that. No point in dragging up ancient history, but if you put it like this most reasonable people would understand.

ERICS_MUM

Every time she starts on about you in earshot of your colleagues just look at them with a shrug of your shoulders, rolling of your eyes and a mischievous grin - full marks if you can manage all 3 simultaneously ! Anyway, just to let everyone know you don't care and actually find her ways amusing.

Or as I used to do, albeit as a manager in a large department of mainly women, just tell her to "pack it in".

People like this at work are a PITA. I'd advise against an email as she is likely to be as crafty as a box of monkeys and find a way to use it against you - formally or informally. Ignoring or humouring her would really pee her off whilst giving you "job satisfaction". Double whammy.

themull1

heuchera wrote: »

That made me laugh out loud!!

JasX

breaking_free wrote: »

Call her out on her debt. "Frankly I'm not prepared to extend you any favours because you've owed me £200 since <insert date here>. I'm still waiting for you to pay me back."

I'd be specific as possible, since , asking be to sub you for £200 of <item type> shopping at <store name and city> on <insert date>. You were unable to pay me as agreed on payday claiming to have 'forgotten' and would pay next month... and then never did.

Pollycat

breaking_free wrote: »

Call her out on her debt. "Frankly I'm not prepared to extend you any favours because you've owed me £200 since <insert date here>. I'm still waiting for you to pay me back."

JasX wrote: »

I'd be specific as possible, since , asking be to sub you for £200 of <item type> shopping at <store name and city> on <insert date>. You were unable to pay me as agreed on payday claiming to have 'forgotten' and would pay next month... and then never did.

But what if this woman - as she appears to be pretty brass-necked - says 'but I repaid you for that! You must have forgotten!'
That then puts the OP in an awkward position in front of her colleagues in a 'you did, no, I didn't situation.

The OP has already written off the £200 so better not to bring it up - imho.

lulu_92

Pollycat wrote: »

But what if this woman - as she appears to be pretty brass-necked - says 'but I repaid you for that! You must have forgotten!'
That then puts the OP in an awkward position in front of her colleagues in a 'you did, no, I didn't situation.

The OP has already written off the £200 so better not to bring it up - imho.

Oooh, that's a good point! We know that this woman is capable of lying like this, why wouldn't she try and worm her way out of anything thrown at her.

Ignore her, she'll go away eventually as she'll get bored of not getting a reaction from you. If anyone comes and asks you about these accusations, set them straight but leave it at that.

foolofbeans

In an ideal world OP would ask the woman to lunch to talk about things and then leave to go to the bathroom and walk out leaving the woman to pick up the tab.
Of course that would be playing games which people like this enjoy but I would relish the thought of doing that (but would never do so myself).