SOA - please help!! I want to start today!

debbie_debt

I think there have been so many suggestions here that are practical and easily achieved, so I won't repeat them. I think something that's coming through though is that you are used to a certain life. There's nothing wrong with this - you certainly seem to have worked hard to do well in life and it's clear you want to give your children everything. It can be hard to change this, particularly when kids are used to clubs/lavish birthdays/expensive holidays etc. I'm sure their mates all live similar lives too, which makes it so much harder to trim their lives back. I completely get it - and was a very similar mum until recently.

HOWEVER having said all that, if you skip forwards 10 years and try to imagine the life you can give them if you've been made bankrupt, lost the house, lost the cars etc and the only property you can get is a 3 bed council house. Now's the time to change when it's being done on your terms rather than being forced into it. Think about the painless cuts (swapping gas and electricity suppliers/swap your debt to 0% etc) then trim back the rest. Yes, it will be hard to explain why you're going from a nice big new hire car to much cheaper alternative older car, but it really is necessary. You're living in a never-ending spiral of debt which you're not going to get out of without some sacrifice.

Sorry if that sounded harsh - I do understand, but now's your time to change. Good luck! xx

Forward_thinking

Thanks Meer - fortunately I am really excited and geared up to working which will be a big help. But you are quite right, it's difficult when he is denying we aren't a lost cause. he went through a spell when he was really fired up to leave, save, counting up the money in the money jar - but didn't last long. I am determined to turn things around on my own but as you say, it's going to be really difficult, if not impossible.

Forward_thinking

Thanks Debbie - I hear you. And totally agree. You speak a lot of sense and are quite right when you mention about the circle of friends we have. That doesn't actually bother me - as I said I drive a very old car. However, it definitely bothers husband - he is always pointing out how our car, house is really small comparatively. It didn't help when one of my daughter's friends came home the other day and asked if we have a swimming pool.

Unfortunately, we can't change gas and electric as it's a rental and fixed and we can't get any new credit cards at 0% as we would fail the credit checks due to our existing high levels (this is what husband says - I am presuming he is correct).

questionss

Forward_thinking wrote: »

Upsidedown - got it 'upside down' - the life insurance is for him but would help me if anything happened to him : ((((

Husband is a contractor and commutes in each day. It's a long contract though for a couple of years so no immediate concerns on him losing this.

I can't remember when he started his current contract - probably about 2.5 years. He had about six months off but before that was on a daily rate of about £1200. He only accepted this contract because he obviously had no choice.

I am really clueless about the state of affairs with his business. I know he has occasionally juggled things about and taken a loan. I need to get the figures from him. I know I am a shareholder in the company so it's not really acceptable for me to be naive in this area. Could you help a novice to this and tell me what questions I should be asking him?

Thanks for your help. Everybody is so kind on here - I expected so much confrontation!!!!!

Things DH and I discuss in relation to his limited company ...
What's your day rate, how long do you think this contract will last, what salary should we draw down for day to day stuff, what expenses can be paid from the company (some travel on short & medium term contracts new IT gear etc.), how much holiday are you likely to take...
We take dividends for things such as cars, holiday, house deposits - before dividends are taken we discuss if he's happy in the contract, if it's likely to be renewed, how close to tax bands we are and how much we want to leave in the company.
We have taken directors loans occasionally and the main thing here was that he had enough longevity of contract left for us to calculate that he'd be able to take that as a dividend within a few months. You need to know when that money needs to be back in the acct, as otherwise it was undeclared income on his personal tax return.

Taking a rate drop from £1200 must have been hard - no matter how good the current rate is, and I know in the sort of fields your DH will be working in that there will be a lot of big spending characters, keeping up appearances etc. I feel for you both.
My DH in a previous contract used to buy lunch every day - usually in the canteen at £6-7 a day... He said it was important to be seen for networking and that he couldn't just take a sandwich/soup etc... It all changed when it became more of a health decision not a finance one - now him & others in his current team have super healthy pack-ups (more expensive than most pack ups but still less than eating out etc!) He now tends to only buy lunch out once a week for networking/building links etc! Lunch spending has dropped and about £15 a week saved - £700 a year - a long weekend in center parcs...
Once I pointed those figures out to him he was quite chuffed!

getmore4less

Forward_thinking wrote: »

I can't remember when he started his current contract - probably about 2.5 years. He had about six months off but before that was on a daily rate of about £1200

OK history now but probably contributing to the mind situation thats a big change in disposable income to deal with if you had been using it rather than using it to secure a future.

If the hire car has been going for 40months he was running that while out of contract!

How long was that £1200pd contract it is really hard to spend £6k per week(even whats left after tax) there should have been healthy retained earnings within the business with that income to cover the down time and holidays.

If you have gone from £1200pd(and spending it) to something more like £500-600pd thats a big adjustment.

Presumably he does not get paid by the client when on holiday so is he saving in the business to cover the weeks off?

Perhaps with 2 years past it is time to be looking for those more lucrative contracts again.

tallyhoh

You do have a right to change gas & electric suppliers as a tenant.

Willowpop

Hi Forward thinking. ..As mentioned above, you can change gas/electric suppliers as a tenant. You pay the bills,you can chop and change as you like, unless there's some weird clause in your contract.


Also, re the 0%cards, this website does an eligibility checker for cards...It does a soft search so doesn't mark your credit record etc. I've found it pretty accurate. You might not be able to get a card with a big enough limit to shift all of your debt, but even if you can move a couple of grand then you'd be saving the interest there. Give the eligibility checker a go and see what it says.
I haven't got a link for it but Google money saving expert card eligibility checker and it'll come up.

liveyoung

I know my there is a clause in my contract asking for written permission to change suppliers, but my LL explained that they'd had issues with tenants moving to First Utility (I think) and then the LL was stuck with £50+ charges to move away from them. No issues with changing suppliers otherwise.

Willowpop

Couple of links for you..
re tenant and switching: https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/consumer/energy/energy-supply/get-a-better-energy-deal/switching-energy-supplier-if-youre-a-tenant/

Re eligibility checker:
https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/eligibility/credit-cards/

getmore4less

On the CC front a purchase 0% might be the option there is enough normal spends to make one viable BUT you have to use the cash to pay down the other cards not increase the debt.