Keeping on the straight and narrow. Again.

edited 25 January 2016 at 6:57AM in Debt free diaries
65 replies 5.4K views
snozberrysnozberry Forumite
1.2K Posts
edited 25 January 2016 at 6:57AM in Debt free diaries
Hi all,

I am no stranger to this board but I have not logged on for agesss. Basically, I am turning into my parents and if I don't do something about it now then I am doomed.

My mum and dad have had a dodgy relationship with money and, well, with life in general. We didn't have much when growing up and, whatever money they had, just trickled through their fingers. When they got themselves straight, they still had this overwhelming need to convert their money into tat. They couldn't go anywhere or do anything without spending. When they had no money, mum would bring piles of leaflets home! It was just clutter everywhere and nothing was ever looked after.

Now, I am an adult but witnessing all of that when I was growing up left its mark. I have a little cc debt which will be gone when I get paid tomorrow but I am so, so bad with my money. I just spend without thinking. When I was earning peanuts (and not too long ago I have to add) I did it all - spending diaries, mystery shopping, surveys, swagbucking, second job, batch cooking ... and managed to top my earnings up by a considerable amount each month but now that I am earning more in my main job and am in a settled relationship and have a child I have reverted to some silly way. I can't MS or survey or even take on another job as I just don't have the time as I have a toddler but I just need to remember what it was like when I was living in Skintsville. And I have lived there so many times in the past.

I know that I am a resourceful person who will always get by but I just need to ensure that I don't end up living like that again. Just looking around the house, I can see clutter. I can see sticky handprints where there shouldn't be, and dust and things not in their home. I can see stuff that we never use. I can see pet hair that should have been cleaned up and washing-up that should have been done and put away. I just don't want to end up like my parents.

I start off each payday month with the very best of intentions but by the time week three roles around whatever I moved to my savings account gets moved back. I used to take pride in having seven or eight or nine NSDs on the trot. Why can't I be like that again??!

If I can type a few sentences or the odd paragraph every few days or every other day I should be able to stay on the straight and narrow, can't I??



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Replies

  • It's really hard to keep on top of a home, even to clean it, if there are too many things. I spend very little nowadays and it's because I no longer have a friendly relationship with The Things in my house.


    It's not just the ones you can see - it's also the ones cluttering cupboards and drawers. I've got a wardrobe which I barely use because the work clothes in it - which touch wood, working for myself, I will never need again, - are, I tell myself, too good to throw away, but at the same time I never get down to the dress agency (just downstairs, I might add so I wouldn't even need the car) to see if the lady could get rid of it all for me for a decent price.


    I know this would be a bit hard with a toddler, but how about doing a car boot sale? You'ld make some space and have some extra dosh.
  • snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    dktreesea wrote: »
    I know this would be a bit hard with a toddler, but how about doing a car boot sale? You'ld make some space and have some extra dosh.

    Hello! It's funny you should mention that because I do use the selling sites on facebook. I made a couple hundred quid over the summer selling workstuff I no longer used. I have just started selling some more things on there. A carboot when the weather is nicer would be a good thing - just need to convince the OH first that getting up at an even sillier o'clock is a good idea lol.
  • snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    I forgot that you need to subscribe to your own thread. Silly me.

    Right-e-o. I am going to be a wreck today as I was up until gone midnight and wide awake until even later. It's my OH's turn to put the little one to bed so I will be able to - touch wood - get an early night.

    I did all of my internet banking last night. I wasn't able to pay all of my CC bill but I didn't realise that this month (like next) is a council tax free month so when I go upstairs in a few moments I can pay the rest of it. The internet banking app on my phone is a god send.

    Anyway, all bills have been paid and money has been moved around. In my 'spends' account, I have £300 just sitting there so I have £50 a week spends with £100 left over for emergencies. My OH owes me some money so when he gives me that, it can go into my savings account.

    You know, I have no idea where my money went last month. It used to go on sneaky lunches at work as I struggle for time in the morning to make a packed lunch but I hardly ever nip to Tesc0 at lunchtime because I haven't had the time. Spending diary it is!

    I also forgot to mention that I shop and scan religiously and Bo0ts Panel Review keep me stocked up in smellies (must say that I have been very lucky on that site).

    Ok. I really need to get a wriggle on as my munchkin is still in his pjs, my hair is still wet and the carpet is sodden from where he threw his cereal. Joyous. Today will be a NSD. Tomorrow won't be as two of my colleagues and I are going out for tea and I need to stock up on catfood but, after that, there will be as £50 will only stretch so far.
  • Subscribe to own thread..... LBM..... That's why I need to keep searching for it.

    It's funny you mention your past in skintsville....... I think I actually had more money when I was a skint student than I do now! It's all about expectations I tihink.

    Good luck. I
    This will be the (second) year:beer: Target £20K:eek:
  • snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    1974nicola wrote: »
    Subscribe to own thread..... LBM..... That's why I need to keep searching for it.

    It's funny you mention your past in skintsville....... I think I actually had more money when I was a skint student than I do now! It's all about expectations I tihink.

    Good luck. I

    I always felt loaded when at uni as well. I used to go out with a tenner and still have change for a bag of chips on the way home. Oh they were the days!

    Well, today was an NSD. Go me! Tomorrow won't be as I am going out for tea with two of my colleagues. Well, tea and a much needed whinge about work. The walls at the pub don't have ears you see ;)
  • BobarellaBobarella Forumite
    10.8K Posts
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    Good luck with it all. I just wanted to say don't best yourself up for not having a pristine home with a tiny around. It's hard work just keeping them safe each day. I'd recommend developing a good daily and weekly routine that keeps you on track roughly. You can do it again you did it before. Don't beat yourself up.
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
  • snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    Bobarella wrote: »
    Good luck with it all. I just wanted to say don't best yourself up for not having a pristine home with a tiny around. It's hard work just keeping them safe each day. I'd recommend developing a good daily and weekly routine that keeps you on track roughly. You can do it again you did it before. Don't beat yourself up.


    Thanks!Tbf, it's not that bad. We just need to be a tad tidier but it's hard when we both work FT and have a toddler. We would just rather play and muck about in the evening.
  • snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    Today was another spendy day - just over £20 at Morrison's (most of it wasn't needed but teas are sorted for the next few days). My CC is gone and a few quid in cashback was deposited in my bank account. Happy days.
  • BobarellaBobarella Forumite
    10.8K Posts
    Savvy Shopper! I've been Money Tipped!
    snozberry wrote: »
    Thanks!Tbf, it's not that bad. We just need to be a tad tidier but it's hard when we both work FT and have a toddler. We would just rather play and muck about in the evening.

    Just try and enjoy them as much as you can. The housework will wait.
    " Your vibe attracts your tribe":D

    Debt neutral :) 27/03/17 from £40k:eek: in the hole 2012.
    Roadkill 17 £56.58 2016-£62.28 2015- £84.20)
    RYSAW17 £1900 2016 £2,535.16 2015 £1027.20
  • edited 28 January 2016 at 9:31PM
    snozberrysnozberry Forumite
    1.2K Posts
    edited 28 January 2016 at 9:31PM
    I came home from work in a foul mood. The boss pulled me up on something but wasn't very nice about. I stood my ground and argued my case (in a polite manner) and he ended up being super nice and backing down. It still blo0dy annoyed me though.

    Today ended up being a spendy day as well as the window cleaner needed paying which annoyed me as well as I am sure that he has tried pulling a fast one. HOWEVER, I did come home from a letter from the DVLA. I thought that I was in bother to begin with but it ended up being a refund for the tax in my last car. My old car was stolen under incredibly violent means last month and it had to be replaced (which it has - no finance needed thanks to car insurance). So, a refund came through for that and I also came home to a lovely (and much needed) parcel from Boots Review Panel and the free RSPB bird watch pack.

    Every cloud as a silver lining an' all
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