Money Moral Dilemma: Should I buy a cheaper engagement ring?

AubreyMac

Although it may be crude to specify an amount to be spent, I'd be rather upset if my partner proposed with a £20 Argos ring.

While I'm all for being sensible with money, I would never marry a cheapskate.

Petra_70

AubreyMac wrote: »

Although it may be crude to specify an amount to be spent, I'd be rather upset if my partner proposed with a £20 Argos ring.

While I'm all for being sensible with money, I would never marry a cheapskate.

Why? ......

lorriedriver1988

I don't think you should put a price on the ring. At the end of the day, its the thought that counts. My DH proposed to me with a pink sapphire and diamond ring. I now know due to him telling me that the ring was second hand and cost him under £50. He has since bought me a new engagement ring because my fingers shrunk after having my DS. We did inquire about having my original ring resized but it was not worth the money. I still wear my original engagement ring on my right hand, as I cherish it.

What I'm trying to say is that the engagement ring is a symbol of your love and commitment to each other. The price of the ring seems trivial to me, the gesture of proposing should be enough and the fact you're declaring your love to her by proposing. To put it in perspective, some engagement rings retail for £1500+. I know there are people that could organise an entire wedding for the cost of one engagement ring.

I would suggest talk to her about the engagement and encourage her to compromise on the price of the ring. Any money saved from buying a cheaper ring could be put it towards the wedding

Petra_70

lorriedriver1988 wrote: »

I don't think you should put a price on the ring. At the end of the day, its the thought that counts. My DH proposed to me with a pink sapphire and diamond ring. I now know due to him telling me that the ring was second hand and cost him under £50. He has since bought me a new engagement ring because my fingers shrunk after having my DS. We did inquire about having my original ring resized but it was not worth the money. I still wear my original engagement ring on my right hand, as I cherish it.

What I'm trying to say is that the engagement ring is a symbol of your love and commitment to each other. The price of the ring seems trivial to me, the gesture of proposing should be enough and the fact you're declaring your love to her by proposing. To put it in perspective, some engagement rings retail for £1500+. I know there are people that could organise an entire wedding for the cost of one engagement ring.

I would suggest talk to her about the engagement and encourage her to compromise on the price of the ring. Any money saved from buying a cheaper ring could be put it towards the wedding

Exactly! A person who whines and gets sniffy about having a ring that hasn't cost a fortune, comes across as shallow, demanding, and horribly materialistic. As I said earlier, if I was a man, I would run a mile from a woman like this.

If you genuinely loved someone and wanted to spend the rest of your life with them, the cost of the engagement ring they gave you would not be an issue.

Kynthia

Petra_70 wrote: »

Who IS this moneysaver, and where and when did they ask this question? :huh:

Anyway, that aside, if I were a man, and any woman I was dating demanded that I spend a certain allocated amount on an engagement ring for her, she would be my ex rather sharpish.

Imagine what a bridezilla she will be? And even worse, what a nightmare demanding wife she will be? I don't want a house unless it's worth seven figures, I don't want a car unless it's worth six figures, I only want Armani and D & G fashions in this house, I won't go to any hairdresser unless they charge at least 100 pounds for a haircut.

Seriously, what man would want a nightmare woman like THIS?! Telling him he absolutely MUST spend a 'certain amount' on an engagement ring. Cheeky bint. :rotfl:

That's if this 'dilemma' is even real.

You're being very judgemental about a woman that possibly only jokingly told her boyfriend that it's 'tradition' to spend a month's salary.

OP, if it's not something you are buying together then buy what you think she'd love within a budget you can afford. You can get more for your money buying second-hand or direct from traders. Don't tell her what you spent as the mystery is likely to be better than the reality in many women's eyes and at the end of the day people just want to know that thought was put into the purchase.

Middlestitch

Why ask here? The views of a bunch of strangers won't influence how either of you feels. Talk to her! She's supposed to be the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with, so starting with unreasonable expectations (her) or deceit (you) doesn't sound a great idea.

FreeBear

Save yourself a lifetime of grief and spend the money on having the snip instead.

Sharon87

Reminds me of the time my friends from school got engaged. They were 17 or 18 at the time he proposed, the guy's dad had a go at him for proposing with a £10 ring! He saved up for a bit and bought one for £100. Not sure if that was always the plan or not!

I think the price of the ring isn't that important, but I would expect an engagement ring to be priced accordingly if you are going to wear it for the rest of your life. I'm not saying how much to spend, but I reckon at least a day or two's salary would be reasonable.

If I had a partner and we got engaged and he found a lovely ring for less than expected I'd be pleased, as long as it wasn't cheaper because it was bad quality and likely to fall apart in a few years!

Shelly_C

My first instinct is that she is a money grabber if she has specified an amount you need to spend. Its almost as though she is asking you to prove how much you love her in the cost of the ring. Alternatively, maybe she is insecure and feels that if you don't spend a lot then she is not worth a lot to you?

if you are planning to get married then you need to sit down and seriously talk about this. The ring is about what it means rather than how much it costs - and you can get some REALLY NICE rings at reasonable prices. Maybe she is more worried about what her friends will think of it than whether or not it is actually attractive - or practical even. If she is planning to wear it day in day out for years then it needs to be something which will not be easily damaged.

Think about it carefully

consumers_revenge

Just tell her she can specify how much the ring costs if you can specify how much nookie you can have weekly. I'm sure she'll be happy to end up reducing both. ;-)