Quit everything , and start again over 50?

another_casualty

Trying to keep upbeat. However, I'm feeling a bit scared right now.( yes really;) )
With the time off since Xmas eve , my body has been aching a lot .
Probably due to reduction of steroid ( down to 1 prednisolone since 16 dec, hopefully finished of it on 16 Jan)
I was gonna do some more painting of the flat, but can't do as a rest is needed.( myasthenia makes you tired)

I'm loving twickenham , while on my break and will be sad to leave it if I'm brave enough. Probably because I haven't been commuting since Xmas eve. It seems daft that having a lot of positive equity means I still have to move .

Karonher

Have you made the decision to move to Poole? If you are worried about employment have you looked into agency work until you feel you are fit enough to go for something permanent?

another_casualty

Still thinking about it . Feeling nervous . Before the Xmas break, I was more fed up with London than ever . I was looking at Winchester today on the web. Question is , am I brave enough to get out of my comfort zone and move somewhere where I'll,know nobody .

Andypandyboy

How old are you AC? You do seem drawn to Poole but seem unsure if the move is what you want.

You say you are ill, could you take some sick leave and go and stay with friends in the poole area to recuperate? Once there, you could be looking for jobs/properties.

Debt_free_by_2020

Hi, just read your thread and thought I'd give you my 2 cents on it.

Firstly, Winchester is beautiful but I went to univeristy there and it can get dull as it is a very small 'city' (has a university and a cathedral but I don't think is city worthy population wise). This can be annoying as you have to spend money on trains to Southampton, London, Bournemouth etc but then again everything is fairly accessible and like I said, it is beautiful. Keep in mind that it is a 'student' city and therefore is fairly full of younger people who like to go out for a few during the week etc (not a problem if you don't live in student housing areas or right in the center though)

Secondly, please stop taking other people's opinions as gospel. IT is dangerous to make big life choices based on how other people would react in YOUR situation. You are the only one who can truly know how to play the hand you have been dealt. Although it is good to welcome other's advice and opinion you should take it with a pinch of salt and not be scared to say that you will still do what you see is best for you. It's much easier to live with regrets in life if you are able to say that you gave it a go and made the decision based on your own thinking rather than feeling resentful that a friend or family member gave you so called '!!!! advice'. Make sure you can own your decisions in a year or two.

Thirdly, I'm a firm believer in positive quitting. I went through a thoroughly !!!! time about 4-5 years ago. My dad died suddenly during my final year of university, I had put on a LOT of weight, was in a job I loathed (used to cry on a daily basis and started having anxiety attacks on a regular basis). I decided to do something radical to get some perspective and distance all at the same time. I researched for ages and eventually found an volunteer internship abroad for a month (all I could afford at the time, wish I could have stayed there longer). I took a risk and paid £200 deposit for it so I was committed to either losing the deposit or making it happen. I gave myself a year and when that year was up I jetted off to Fiji on my own with no job to come back to and a bunch of debts in tow (not very financially responsible but I was at rock bottom and needed shaking up) and I can honestly say that to this day it was the best thing I ever did.

I came back and things were no different at home (life just keeps going as usual) but I was different, and that was the main thing. I realised I had the ability to take charge of my own life so I stopped doing things I hated and had been feeling obligated to do out of habit.

I found a new job (through a temp agency, totally recommend that), stopped seeing people who I realised I'd been having toxic relationships with (instantly felt better, never realised this had been dragging me down), got a personal trainer and lost a lot of weight, found a new kind of confidence and outlook on life.

All of this was done in baby steps over the last 3 years but my point is that you will be the same person no matter where you live so make sure that the reasons you want to move away aren't things which will follow you to the new place.

I would personally recommend a little holiday, perhaps alone so you are forced to really think about things and go out of your comfort zone to see what you are capable of, I bet you'll see a whole new side to yourself. You don't have to go to Fiji haha but even a little trip in Europe doing something you love will open up your ideas to what direction you want to go in life. I'm sensing that you're a little lost at the moment as you seem very easily swayed by other's opinions on your life choices... I might be wrong though.

"If you always do what you've always done, then you'll always get what you've always got..." Just some food for thought

If you are itching for a change but are held back out of fear then just take a breath, feel the fear and do it anyway some of the best things are born out of doing something scary.

Finally, feel free to take everything I've said with a pinch of salt too (I'm no expert and have no idea about the actual ins and outs of your life in the bigger picture. Just remember to be able to own your decisions

Good luck with whatever you decide, I'll subscribe to see how you're getting on. Sorry this is an essay (I'm full of useless agony aunt advice haha).

another_casualty

Thanks df. Glad things are going your way & Andy pandy
I've always played it safe . Never had a career as such, but always worked constantly on poor wages . I used to have loads of friends , but most moved away got married etc. I know virtually nobody in twickenham but have lived there for almost 15 years .

Money is obviously the thing that dominates what I can / can't do in life .
All of my friends ( or most;) ) are in better careers than me and are sensible. They know that London prices are out of control, and with my salary they say that I won't be able to pay mortgage by retirement age and while I'm just 'existing', I could move and buy a property outright with cash in the bank for a change.

My health until the recession in 2007 was fantastic . Going to the gym everyday , four and a half stone lighter and upbeat about everything.
My health only deteriorated about 2010( the year my brother moved in/ friction with a controlling work colleague etc).
This caused high blood pressure. In 2014 is when I got diagnosed with m.g.
The m g is not as bad now, but would improve by losing a lot of weight.

While I love my flat, I'm not doing anything . I over stretched myself mortgage wise. Made mistake debt wise. (I just don't earn enough London living). The job is not as bad as it was, but the company is changing and not as profitable as it was .

If I could afford holidays , I'd go on some .

Ill ways said that 2015 was my worst ever year, & that I would reflect and make a decision around the end of Jan.
I think that once I start painting again and get the flat valued I will make my decision.

Sorry for rambling again

Candy0107

How about somewhere like Andover or Basingstoke ? Basingstoke has great transport links and a fair few big companies.

Candy

another_casualty

Candy, you have read my mind
I was thinking about this over the last day of two. It's nearer to London .(45mins?) apparently the town centre is student territory.
A nice quite town other than that . Knowing nobody is the problem tho.

Happy new year

Candy0107

another_casualty wrote: »

Candy, you have read my mind
I was thinking about this over the last day of two. It's nearer to London .(45mins?) apparently the town centre is student territory.
A nice quite town other than that . Knowing nobody is the problem tho.

Happy new year

We have family there and love it. Sure, there are a load of pubs in the town centre - some studenty some not.

There are loads of clubs you could join - there is so much history n the surrounding areas.

Happy New Year to you too

Candy x

firesidemaid

Hi.


Happy New Year to you AC


Having read your thread through I have a few thoughts.....#


There are risks with anything you do / change - just go for it, whatever IT is!


You do not have to spend money to lose weight - walk, walk, walk & eat healthily. You do have the time, you just THINK that you don't.


Join a local group/take up a new hobby.


Have you recently done an SOA? Is there money to be saved in your budget/can your money work better for you? How long is left on your DMP?


IF you had ALL the options in the ideal world, what would you REALLY like to do?