Struggling with whether to leave

supersaverkerry

Just reading through the replies today and I just want to say I have no concerns about the safety of my children, he wants a family of his own but there is nothing which indicates to me that there is an unsavoury thoughts behind this, he simply wants to be a father.


He is a cheat and liar but I have no concerns that he is a danger to the family.

grey_lady

Kerry, you know right that he is not 'the one' - he doesn't respect you in the slightest, doesn't see you and your children as being his family.

So I think ditch him - but don't quit your course and certainly don't give up on your dreams - soon you'll be qualified and able to get sorted financially. In the meantime have you tried to get a council or HA place?

mum2one

youve worked so hard with uni / placements, please try to look into finishing the course, with your debts have you contacted stepchange and taken advice x

dragonette

You may be able to repeat this year of uni, a miscarriage is traumatic and I would think is covered by their discretionary rules. If that is so, then you can work till next Sept and hopefully that will mean you don't have to drop out of your course.

Personally, from what had been described, this isn't a relationship that is going to last and be healthy. Not for you, not for him and not for your sons

VfM4meplse

gabriel1980 wrote: »

I'm sure he does love you

What gives you this infinite wisdom?

gabriel1980 wrote: »

but he's probably just looking for some excitement, are you meeting his needs?

A man as selfish as the examples suggest will never have his "needs" met. Nor does he deserve for them to be met. He doesn't deserve a damn thing.

headachesrus

Do you have to leave? Is it feasible to separate from him but stay in the property until you have finished your course. I have a friend who went through a divorce doing this because of financial implications.

duchy

As it is so early in the uni year you may be able to withdraw from this year and defer and go back in one or two year's time . Please make sure you speak to the uni and know exactly what your options are before withdrawing to protect the course credits you've already earned.

FBaby

I'm saying it's not ok to invade other people's privacy

However, not every one has the same definition of privacy depending on the level of relationship and the persons involved.

OH and I are quite private people and tend to do things separately. We have separate bank accounts, but we would have no issue sharing our details. Same with phones/laptops, we have codes that we haven't officially shared, but when I needed to use OH's laptop, he didn't think twice of telling me what it was and leaving me to use it. I would do the same.

I do find that those shouting the loudest about their right to their privacy are those who have something to hide. Somehow, they are usually the ones whose partner feel a need to look into their things!

duchy

FBaby wrote: »

However, not every one has the same definition of privacy depending on the level of relationship and the persons involved.

OH and I are quite private people and tend to do things separately. We have separate bank accounts, but we would have no issue sharing our details. Same with phones/laptops, we have codes that we haven't officially shared, but when I needed to use OH's laptop, he didn't think twice of telling me what it was and leaving me to use it. I would do the same.

I do find that those shouting the loudest about their right to their privacy are those who have something to hide. Somehow, they are usually the ones whose partner feel a need to look into their things!

I've always automatically respected other people's privacy with phones, email etc. My partner was amazed when I asked him if I could access his email to check an order he'd had trouble with and he asked me to sort out. He couldn't believe I felt the need to ask.

C_Mababejive

Not read it all,only needed to read post #1 and that was enough.

Do yourself a big favour and get rid,run,run run....

Believe me there will be someone else more worthwhile for you than this joker. Stay and he will wreck your life. He sounds like a complete loser.