Have I made a mistake?

BrassicWoman

I hope writing it down has given you perspective. You don't need us to tell you what to do, do you?

SarahHH_2

The house is in my name only.

SarahHH_2

@BrassicWoman - no :-)

That is a sad smile, as I really do love him, and we could be so good but for the finance issue.

Slimgimli

Sarah! I wasted 20 years of my life on a man who sounds very similar to yours, hoping he would change.......he didn't!!!! don't waste any more of yours ........

SarahHH_2

Thanks, everyone.

Slimgimli, that's what I'm scared of. I've been single most of my life, and am definitely not money-motivated. I don't mind at all earning more than my other half. But he doesn't earn ANYTHING. It's also interesting that he was able to stay at the same job (before I met him) for 8 years, as his mother damn well insisted he pay her rent, yet he's only worked in dribs and drabs since he moved in with me, and given me no money to date?

Lyncroft

You sound a great type. Really, look after yourself or you might really resent it later down the line. I spent many a year always doing what I thought was the "right" thing but then I found it bites you on the bum. Not everyone works to the standards you set for yourself.

Marvel1

SarahHH wrote: »

@BrassicWoman - no :-)

That is a sad smile, as I really do love him, and we could be so good but for the finance issue.

SarahHH wrote: »

My son lives in the US and when I went out to see him, my partner was clearly jealous and told me I was wasting my money.

This stood out for me more.

Time to split up, sell the home and move back to London.

I don't want you to take this the wrong way but this is why I have made it my choice to be single, do what I want when I want. Like you for example could go to US to see your Son without a thought for anyone else.

BrassicWoman

SarahHH wrote: »

@BrassicWoman - no :-)

That is a sad smile, as I really do love him, and we could be so good but for the finance issue.

if it were about money I would agree.... but it isn't really about money. It's about respect for your wishes, and your security.

Slimgimli

To put it bluntly! You are being used....... It took every ounce of my reserves to leave him, but it was worth it, I now have a life again! You only have one, and deep down I think you know what you have to do, it won't be easy or nice, but once you are back in London and your head is clear , I promise you won't regret it! Sometimes love can blinker you, please think long and hard about what YOU want!
He is using mental blackmail to make you feel guilty , don't let him and get back your life

fairy_lights

SarahHH wrote: »

Also if I sold the Mbro house, I could actually do something with the inheritance money, such as buying myself a car, being able to visit my son in the US more, etc.

Yes. Do this. Why waste your time and money on this dead end relationship when you could be living a good life in London and having lots of holidays in the US with your son?