Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 2

Georgiegirl256

Excuse me one momento.....Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

tea_lover

You really do have my sympathies Georgie, it's very frustrating.

Emotional coping really sums it up. Some people just have no skills in that area!

Georgiegirl256

Deleted.....

tea_lover

Ah poop, so sorry your day is going so cra.ppy

pollyanna_26

Georgie sit down love and take a deep breath . I know exactly where you're coming from on this . Although there was physical and mental abuse involved I also recognise the feeling of being ignored and somehow not having a valid opinion . I used to feel as if I was banging my head against a brick wall . When I divorced my husband it took me a long time to feel I had valid opinions and a right to be seen as a fellow human being .
I think that we go into relationships expecting a pretty equal partnership . Sometimes we fail to realise that things shift regarding who gives and who takes . I am now way saying you give up . I don't know why you split up originally but just take a step back think about what you feel is wrong .
It seems if you both want a way to make it work you have to try but it sounds as if that may involve some form of counselling both for him and maybe as a couple .
take care
polly

Georgiegirl256

Oh no physical abuse! Not really any mental as such, just the way he is sometimes, his attitude to things.

pollyanna_26

Georgie - I was refering to my former marriage . A point to consider is many people who have a lack of emotional education often become very defensive when certain facts are raised .I think it may be a mix of embarrasment . not knowing how to change , and possibly with men a macho thing of not showing weakness .
polly

Georgiegirl256

You're right, that's exactly what it is. A mixture of all those things. Just wish he wasn't like that and would open up and not be like that when things don't go his way.

Sorry you went through all that in your former marriage

tea_lover

And that defensiveness builds into a bigger and bigger wall until one day you think, !!!! it, you can rot behind there.

Georgiegirl256

tea_lover wrote: »

And that defensiveness builds into a bigger and bigger wall until one day you think, !!!! it, you can rot behind there.

Yup

He's gone to bed now.

Anyhow, enough about me, I've clogged up the pages enough