I WILL get there!!

sashybo

Aww Kirsty, sorry to hear you've been feeling down. *hugs*

I think there is so much pressure about how you're meant to feel all the time and especially when it comes to pregnancy and babies. You feel the way you feel - try not to put pressure on yourself. The feelings you're expecting will come but there's no set timetable!

As for the moving thing, I found it really weird at first but I soon got used to it. My mum always told me being pregnant was something like the film Alien (:eek::rotfl:) as it was so weird to have something moving around inside you. :rotfl:

I started to enjoy it later on as it reassured me that all was well and the baby was responding to my voice/DH's voice and/or touch. The weirdest sensation was when the baby had the hiccups - it took me a couple of times of it happening to realise what it was!

Honeysucklelou2

How exciting to find out you are having a boy and what a lovely thought about having a scan in NZ to include your in-laws.

I understand about not wanting your little one to be taken for a day trip etc when the in-laws visit. My youngest is 2 and I'm just getting to the stage where I'm ok with him going to the park with his 17 year old sister:rotfl: Go with your instincts.

Re the movement...I used to find that movement took place at certain times of the day or not. As the pregnancy progresses you may find that your little one will respond to touch or voice by kicking.

Kitten868

I've been AWOL, I come back and there's a mini-poos in the world! How totally fantastic! I'm so pleased for you. That's the best news. Congratulations to you and Mr Poos!
I wouldn't want my 4 year old travelling 4 hours away and 4 hours back... cant imagine anyone asking for her at 8 weeks. I'm a weirdo though. I'm totally obsessed by my children. They'd have just got the death stare.
It is like a fish in there flipping about. That's normal. So normal. My first I knew everything she was up to in there. Got to know her routine. Could see her little hands, feet and elbows jabbing out of and moving across my tummy. It was horrifically painful as she enjoyed kicking and pushing my endo pouches. I cried so much and constantly feared she was on trouble as the pain couldn't just affect me, surely? Yep. Just me, she was growing healthy and strong. Second time around I had anterior placenta. Couldn't feel her in there or see her form. I didn't feel as connected at all. And I was too busy mumming dd1. Then she came out and starting feeding before they cut the cord and I fell completely in love.
Pregnancy is not nice. It's horrid. Some people get through ok. But most people have something to moan about. Labour is horrid. It's not a spiritual experience. But then it's over and you have baby. And that's fantastic. I don't know anyone that enjoyed pregnancy. You're growing a human. Xxxx

kirtsypoos

sashybo wrote: »

Aww Kirsty, sorry to hear you've been feeling down. *hugs*

I think there is so much pressure about how you're meant to feel all the time and especially when it comes to pregnancy and babies. You feel the way you feel - try not to put pressure on yourself. The feelings you're expecting will come but there's no set timetable!

As for the moving thing, I found it really weird at first but I soon got used to it. My mum always told me being pregnant was something like the film Alien (:eek::rotfl:) as it was so weird to have something moving around inside you. :rotfl:

I started to enjoy it later on as it reassured me that all was well and the baby was responding to my voice/DH's voice and/or touch. The weirdest sensation was when the baby had the hiccups - it took me a couple of times of it happening to realise what it was!

Thanks Sashy - I really beat myself up about it for a few days and had to constantly remind myself that how I feel now may have no bearing on how I feel about baby when he arrives!

Honeysucklelou2 wrote: »

How exciting to find out you are having a boy and what a lovely thought about having a scan in NZ to include your in-laws.

I understand about not wanting your little one to be taken for a day trip etc when the in-laws visit. My youngest is 2 and I'm just getting to the stage where I'm ok with him going to the park with his 17 year old sister:rotfl: Go with your instincts.

Re the movement...I used to find that movement took place at certain times of the day or not. As the pregnancy progresses you may find that your little one will respond to touch or voice by
kicking.

Thanks HSL2 - I think the more people I speak to about it, the more I feel reassured that I'm not being overly mean by saying no!

Kitten868 wrote: »

I've been AWOL, I come back and there's a mini-poos in the world! How totally fantastic! I'm so pleased for you. That's the best news. Congratulations to you and Mr Poos!
I wouldn't want my 4 year old travelling 4 hours away and 4 hours back... cant imagine anyone asking for her at 8 weeks. I'm a weirdo though. I'm totally obsessed by my children. They'd have just got the death stare.
It is like a fish in there flipping about. That's normal. So normal. My first I knew everything she was up to in there. Got to know her routine. Could see her little hands, feet and elbows jabbing out of and moving across my tummy. It was horrifically painful as she enjoyed kicking and pushing my endo pouches. I cried so much and constantly feared she was on trouble as the pain couldn't just affect me, surely? Yep. Just me, she was growing healthy and strong. Second time around I had anterior placenta. Couldn't feel her in there or see her form. I didn't feel as connected at all. And I was too busy mumming dd1. Then she came out and starting feeding before they cut the cord and I fell completely in love.
Pregnancy is not nice. It's horrid. Some people get through ok. But most people have something to moan about. Labour is horrid. It's not a spiritual experience. But then it's over and you have baby. And that's fantastic. I don't know anyone that enjoyed pregnancy. You're growing a human. Xxxx

Ah Kitten I've been wondering where you had escaped to! My placenta is anterior too, so I'm not feeling very much or very strongly. Hoping that changes as he gets bigger though, I really want to feel kicks!

I felt so ungrateful to not be loving pregnancy with everything that had gone on to get here and I guilt tripped myself someone terrible but the truth is, it's weird and not always nice. There have been nice moments but they have been majorly overtaken by the constant vomiting, fainting spells due to low blood pressure, concerns over baby after my GP wrongly prescribed a drug that is toxic to animal fetuses and has never been tested in human pregnancy :eek: amongst other, small things which have been less than fun!

I feel like I'm coming out the other side now though, hopefully it isn't just a fluke and I really am getting better!

kirtsypoos

I had my 20 week scan today which was lovely - I read a pregnancy forum last night about all the things they might find wrong - stupid thing to do :mad: and got hardly any sleep but everything was perfect. Got a photo where it looks like he is waving at us too

Still doesn't feel real and I don't feel 100% connected but now I know everything looks fine and he looks as healthy as can be, perhaps bonding will come. And if not, I know I'll be head over heels with him when he is here so I'm going to give myself a break

Made an OP to OHs BC yesterday so the next DD will take it to £250.00 - the end is near!!

kirtsypoos

Ooooh also forgot to say that I hit our mortgage OP target a month early I'm so happy with how much extra we have managed to pay so far - it will make a real difference when we come to remortgage, especially with interest rates rising!

When the interest gets added on on the 14th I plan to make another OP to take it down to £161,000 exactly which leaves us on track to be under £160k before little one arrives

enthusiasticsaver

Almost debt free then and great news on scan. I think we all take healthy babies for granted but one of my daughters friends discovered her baby had a major heart problem at the 20 week scan a few years ago but these are luckily in the minority. So pleased you have a healthy baby. One of my daughters is expecting her 2nd baby early May next year so we are all very excited.

kirtsypoos

Congrats on a new grandbaby on the way ES!

The things that can go wrong are so scary! I didn't tell friends or family (apart from parents) that it was a boy as I didn't want to jinx anything until after this scan so now I feel free to spread the news

sashybo

Great news on the 20 week scan Kirsty. :j I was freaking out before mine in case there was anything wrong and I hadn't even read much about it. :eek:

I'm glad you're trying to be kinder to yourself, I don't think it felt real to me that I was having an actual baby (as silly as that sounds) until I was holding him. :rotfl: They were wheeling me to the labour ward about 1am from recovery and I was holding him thinking "Oh my god, they're going to leave me alone with him overnight. I can't look after a BABY!" :eek::rotfl:

Pregnancy isn't an easy thing, don't feel bad for not loving every second.

Good news on the debt and mortgage OP's as well. I can't wait to be able to overpay the mortgage, just the little matter of 3 loans to get rid of first though. *sigh*

abba1772

I can't believe your halfway through your pregnancy already xx

Don't feel bad about not enjoying it I think I enjoyed weeks 4-6 weeks as I wasn't so tired and had no all day sickness then after that I hated it as my pelvis was giving up at 10 weeks and I was in a lot of pain.....alll three of my pregnancys weren't nice I guess some people are very lucky to have a wonderful pregnancy but I wasn't one of them .......love my kiddies to bits tho but three is enough.......maybe once they are older I might consider fostering xx