Why do people think less of a couple who aren't married?

PenguinOfDeath

PasturesNew wrote: »

If you don't get married ...and don't have kids .... the future family tree researchers will just see a big fat nothing when they look you up and you'll be the poor old lonely spinster in the tree that nobody loved

All barren and loveless...

Good job I couldn't give a flying **** what people I'm never going to meet think then! Researching history when it's just names on a register, wow what an insight!


Is this the same view for men?

j.e.j.

PasturesNew wrote: »

To who? Old spinsters (say 28 and above)?

I'm an old spinster and I'm not offended

Piggywiggy

lulu_92 wrote: »

He's a lovely man that loves to surprise me and make me happy.

I would say we're "engaged to be engaged" as we both know it's coming one day :rotfl: I'm not fussed about it to be honest, I just know he will want to plan a proposal.

He better hurry, though. One of our friends has a joke agreement with him (made about 8 years ago, mind!) that if neither of them are married when she turns 30 they'll get married. She's 30 next February so I'm expecting that phone call any day :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Engaged to be engaged, I like that!

dirty_magic

PasturesNew wrote: »

If you don't get married ...and don't have kids .... the future family tree researchers will just see a big fat nothing when they look you up and you'll be the poor old lonely spinster in the tree that nobody loved

All barren and loveless...

Haha family trees will be a nightmare in a few years anyway because of all the blended families. They wouldn't get far with ours if we did get married, my OHs dad isn't British. My mom has done ours back a good few generations and she's said before it'd be difficult to trace his dad's side.

PasturesNew

dirty_magic wrote: »

Haha family trees will be a nightmare in a few years anyway because of all the blended families. They wouldn't get far with ours if we did get married, my OHs dad isn't British. My mom has done ours back a good few generations and she's said before it'd be difficult to trace his dad's side.

Mine's quite straight forward .... lots of women with children and no father listed. Mother illegitimate/no named father; great-grandmother illegitimate/no named father (and her younger sister); GG-grandmother's sisters seemed to be popping them out too, without fathers being named.

My own sibling was illegitimate, but with a named father that mum then married ....and divorced. And I only just squeaked under the line of legal for her 2nd marriage.

j.e.j.

Most kids are illegitimate these days..

dirty_magic

Yes mom uncovered some skeletons in the closet doing ours too! It's interesting though, especially finding out the little details like what they all did.

PasturesNew

j.e.j. wrote: »

Most kids are illegitimate these days..

... and right little b*****ds too if you read the DM

Callie22

Someone once told me that I was 'dishonest' because I was living in a committed, monogamous relationship with my OH without being married. However, at the point when they said that to me they were sat next to their mistress and they shut up pretty quickly when I pointed that out.

PasturesNew

dirty_magic wrote: »

Yes mom uncovered some skeletons in the closet doing ours too! It's interesting though, especially finding out the little details like what they all did.

It was me who realised my sibling was born before the marriage (by a year).... if you look yourself up on FreeBMD you're there - but I'd looked up mum's maiden name in surname and mother's maiden name and up she popped again. You'd have thought she'd have known before (she's retired now)! Not sure what she's been using for a birth certificate all these years which would've pointed it out. She's married and has had passports for decades.

I couldn't ask mum what that was all about as she had dementia when I 'discovered' it.