Here we can all be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

That is very true, Pyxis! Thank you for the reminder! Your post also reminded me of my favourite psychiatrist asking me how much better I thought I could get after I was whining about how useless I was. He didn't mean it as negatively as it sounds, despite me having had 16 years of therapy and knowing myself inside out he wanted to me to realise that I cannot fix a chemical imbalance because that involves my body, not my mind. He compared it to my mothers diabetes and said she could understand it and control her diet but she still couldn't stop her sugar levels occasionally going awry for no real reason. No amount of thinking and careful planning could stop that and it's the same with my chemical imbalance, sometimes things are just going to go wrong.

Aw, what a lovely story, JM! WaSp is totally unphased by it and back to playing his computer game, it's me digging the metaphorical hole for myself! Fortunately that happens rarely and I hope it stays like it. I find the actual episodes embarrassing enough as it is!

You could mention it to your doctor, Calley. Doctors don't mind if you express it as a concern rather than as a sure diagnosis. Do remember though that all mental health conditions are on spectrum and altered by the individuals own personal make up. There are degrees of severity in every case, a Bipolar diagnosis doesn't mean it is a huge worry. Believe it or not for someone with two types of schizophrenia I am quite high functioning, most people with the catatonic type need to live in partial or totally residential living. Although I have bad days like today I generally cope with it very well ( I am saying I cope!), there are far more severe symptoms than I have on a daily basis that some unfortunate people go through. Ask your doctor to speak to you about it but don't panic, it could of course be due to anxiety as well which can cause similar symptoms if it's severe..

Flybaby

Jobbingmusician, Calley. Pyxis - are all completely right WaV, but iknow it is real hard to control the fear and the guilt - so just keep coming back in here to see how many people are inspired by your amazing courage and to let those people repay you in some small way by re-assuring you when you need it.


Whining?!?!?! lmao...........you do not whine............you chat with your friends about your life. That's what friends do. WaS - I think you are amazing.


Poo is, unfortunately, a big topic in our house. We managed to save enough to re-do our bathroom a few years ago and I was insistent about how the underside of the toilet looked (all smooth and v.easy to clean) - DH couldn't understand it until I reminded him that I spent half my life on the bathroom floor so I spend a lot of time looking at the underside of the toilet! He will sometimes put a sign up on the bathroom door that says "Welcome to the splatter dome..." to try and make me see the "funny" side of the situation.


Interesting fact - I was told stress would trigger the IBS - but actually I find it is emotion in general - happy or sad. You can imagine my surprise when I was really excited and happy one day and the splatter dome commenced.

dragonette

WaS *hugs* that sounds absolutely draining. I think you are coping really well (and helping lots of us by being so brave about it).

I woke up dissociated today. No idea what set it off, unless its my generally high stress levels atm. I'm mostly back but don't feel like I'm fully reconnected. I'm so so glad to have this space where I can talk about it.

Calley, would it be helpful to you to have a diagnosis?

Georgiegirl256

WaS, I think you are very brave, and also very honest in sharing your experiences with us all. These things can't be helped, and are nothing to be embarrassed about at all.

calleyw

dragonette wrote: »

Calley, would it be helpful to you to have a diagnosis?

No idea. It might help me make sense of everything. And might make things easier going forward.

I might be able to explain to people why I am different and help when I go back to work.

Who knows.

Yours

Calley

jobbingmusician

We've actually been through this, as Mr JM is convinced he is bipolar (and I think he is right). He went to see the GP who gave him a referral to a psychiatrist and a long questionnaire. He filled in the q and that reinforced my belief that he is bipolar. However, we had a long discussion about it and decided NOT to go ahead with the referral as we felt another diagnosis, on top of the physical stuff, would just give the NHS more of an excuse not to give him a decent service

No doubt there was a touch of paranoia in there, but Mr JM was adamant that he didn't want medication in any case, so it seem that there was very little to gain from a formal diagnosis.

Waves_and_Smiles

I have never had a formal diagnosis of Bipolar either although my psychiatrist and the forms show I have a lot of the symptoms. My medication wouldn't change and my psychiatrist was reluctant to add another label to my list, plus it then complicates current diagnoses with whether to alter them to schizo-affective rather than schizophrenic. In some ways labels help me in that it is something to write on welfare forms and a quick way for new doctors to skim over my notes, in others I find them very depressing and don't like how they put people into boxes and do not take the individual into account. I had a new doctor once who saw the schizophrenic diagnosis and told me that I couldn't make decisions about my treatment because schizophrenics were too ill to do that. It thoroughly annoyed me because I am me, not a one size fits all label and quite capable of understanding my condition.

calleyw

Interesting to read other peoples take on this and there own personal experiences.

I could just deal with the depression side and get that better. And work my way through the rest of it on my own.

I am feeling a lot better. But it just seems to quick and good to be the meds. But I want to stay on a even keel and not go backwards!!!!

Yours

Calley

jobbingmusician

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

I had a new doctor once who saw the schizophrenic diagnosis and told me that I couldn't make decisions about my treatment because schizophrenics were too ill to do that. It thoroughly annoyed me because I am me, not a one size fits all label and quite capable of understanding my condition.

GRRRRR! Tell him from me he needs to read up about capacity before he finds himself in court! It is COMPLETELY WRONG to assume people with mental health problems lack capacity, even when they are having a psychotic episode!

Waves_and_Smiles

I agree totally, JM. Even during my first and worse psychotic break I had the capacity to get myself to the hospital. It was incredibly frustrating because it took every bit of control away that I had. How could I give my viewpoint on anything when he believed I was too ill to decided anything for myself? I felt utterly dismissed and made a point of never seeing that doctor again. In hindsight I wish I had made a complaint.