Making things work...

steveouk

I have contacted local relate and put the idea to the other half but had no response from her.
she just walks out on talking because she says its always me that's in the wrong. To me though she just does not like it when I want something and it does not fit in with her likes. I just don't get why its so difficult for her to do what the other person wants I mean there are many things I get on and do but may not like doing. To me there is a lot about double standards

steveouk

Not slept in the same bed/room since Saturday night. Though I have been ill for 3 of those nights.

tea_lover

Why do you want to stay in this relationship...honestly? You don't need to answer here of course, but can you at least give yourself decent answers as to why you're putting up with this?

steveouk

I really don't know but nothing I say or feel seems to matter. She always has a response that's insulting or just swearing at me or walking off. She says oh it always poor me, well its not I just want to have a reasonable discussion with her about being a bit more fair and reasonable about things. Well all I can see now is her avoiding me and a weekend that we were starting to make plans for being a weekend of nothing. No doubt she will spend most of it watching tv.

purpleshoes_2

She doesn't act like she likes you or respects you as a person by the sounds of it, just be aware that this is probably what you are going to be treated like for the rest of your married life unless things drastically change.

kelpie35

Have you no self respect? Why allow another human being to speak to you in that manner?

If I were in you position I would walk away.

I can see from your posts that you have tried numerous times to make this marriage work, but I do not see it materialising.

Give her one last ultimatim , she either seeks help with re your relationship or you are going.

Take care

FBaby

I just want to have a reasonable discussion with her about being a bit more fair and reasonable about things

How long are you going to wait and hope for this though? You can't force someone to communicate with you if they don't want to, and even if they do, the step from hearing you to accepting responsibility and changing their way is a massive big step.

If you could remove yourself from your situation and become an observer, you would not believe it and probably scream at yourself to let it go. You would see that your wife doesn't love you because whatever her natural lack of being able to express how she feels, her attitude is not that of someone who loves their partner, even if there are issues with the relationship.

All I can see when I read your post is a wife who is counting down the days until you go away again and she can enjoy her peaceful home life once again. Surely you deserve better?