Renovations and Repayments.

wendyla

Such good news about your son. Looks like you handled it just right.

ourcornercottage

Hope you are feeling okay:)

what makes you think you have no worth? It appears that you may have been told this in the past, they were wrong. To me you seem to add a lot of value to your family. Are you still seeing your counsellor?

I'm pleased that littlek has made some friends, it's lovely seeing kids develop friendships. Heartwarming.

AlexLK

DollyDee wrote: »

Great news!

Thanks. He had a good day today.

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Ah that's awesome news about Little K. Often it's just a matter of time.

You might not think you're worth worrying about, but we do

HBS x

I think you're right, HBS. It's quite hard for me to see him upset, though.

maman wrote: »

I'm delighted to hear that Alex but please try to put a more positive spin on things even if it's a face for LittleK otherwise he's going to continue to pick up unintended messages from you. So in damning the two new friends with faint praise you've given the impression that all the rest of the school community is contemptuous.

The black dog seems to be snapping at your heels this week (or even chewing at your leg). Any idea of the trigger?

That wasn't my intention.

I was hoping to sort my problems out with a view to working towards going into teaching as I enjoy the music teaching I do and the wider voluntary work in school. When I'm there, the problems go away, probably because there's no time to sit philosophising. When I'm at home things get bad again.

AlexLK

wendyla wrote: »

Such good news about your son. Looks like you handled it just right.

Thanks.

ourcornercottage wrote: »

Hope you are feeling okay:)

what makes you think you have no worth? It appears that you may have been told this in the past, they were wrong. To me you seem to add a lot of value to your family. Are you still seeing your counsellor?

I'm pleased that littlek has made some friends, it's lovely seeing kids develop friendships. Heartwarming.

Not really OK.

Still going to counselling but it's not really helping. Counselling with Mrs K is, though. My parents think I've wasted my life and am of no use to anybody, I think they're right. However much I wish I could, I can't change the past now.

It is nice to see my son is making friends.

maman

AlexLK wrote: »

However much I wish I could, I can't change the past now.

No, but you can try to stop it influencing the future:).


Why have you decided that teaching's not for you when you enjoy it so much?

AlexLK

Not really sure how, though I understand where you're coming from.

Re. teaching: not really sure how I could fit a PCGE / job around my son's schooling unless I could get a job at his school (very unlikely), don't know whether I'd be able to cope with the workload, I'm not really a good influence on others and I'm not getting any younger, so don't see leaving it until my son has gone to senior school as ideal either.

From reading the TES magazine, it seems like if I were to work in the state sector, there's always some new government initiative. Not sure that's a good thing and I do wonder if those with influence consult professionals in the education sector or not before proceeding with some initiatives.

heartbreak_star

Oh my goodness Alex! You're barely in your thirties (are you even there yet?) and you are talking like you're in your seventies!

You have NOT wasted your life. You have a little family, a place to live, and you both work and help kids off your own back. You aren't even halfway through your years yet!!

I know you love your parents...but I want to kick their backsides up between their shoulderblades. You are their son, NOT their clone - if we were all like your parents the world would be a very boring (and IMO a rather stuck-up) place.

Your parents are your past. Your wife and son are your future.

GRRRR!!

HBS x

turtlemoose

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Your parents are your past. Your wife and son are your future.

this, a hundred times over.

cat1978

Hi Alex,

I'm a long time lurker of your thread, but felt compelled to post. I want to echo HBS about not being too old to teach. I went to uni, dropped out after 2 years (long story), went into accounts and became a book-keeper, got married and had 2 kids. At the age of 31 I decided I was bored of my job and would like to be a teacher, so have spent the last 5 years studying with OU, currently in my final year, just to get a degree so that I can go forward to a pgce. I'm 37 and definitely don't feel too old to make a difference, and my kids will at secondary school by the time I make it. My girls actually love the fact that I have to sit and do homework just like they do, and if anything I'm being a good role model because they understand it's never too late to do something different.

On a personal level, I came to the realisation last year that my parents will never understand me or appreciate the person I am, but that doesn't matter, because I'm getting on a bit and the most important people in my life (my children) think I'm amazing!!!!

Love Cat xx


PS sorry for long post, not sure if my waffle will help, but we're all routing for you, and just want you to be happy being the person you are :):)

maman

AlexLK wrote: »

Not really sure how, though I understand where you're coming from.

Re. teaching: not really sure how I could fit a PCGE / job around my son's schooling unless I could get a job at his school (very unlikely), don't know whether I'd be able to cope with the workload, I'm not really a good influence on others and I'm not getting any younger, so don't see leaving it until my son has gone to senior school as ideal either.

From reading the TES magazine, it seems like if I were to work in the state sector, there's always some new government initiative. Not sure that's a good thing and I do wonder if those with influence consult professionals in the education sector or not before proceeding with some initiatives.

The 'not getting any younger' comment is ridiculous as teachers are now expected to work until 68!!:eek: Similarly, you'd find a way to work around LittleK. How do you imagine all other working parents manage? Of course, working at his school isn't an answer and in any event you wouldn't be arriving and leaving at the same time as pupils.


Sadly, what you say about the profession is absolutely true. Initiatives come thick and fast and the workload is huge. And, of course the government doesn't listen to professionals. It's all about making a short term impact for reasons of political dogma. It goes back years and it's still happening. Do you remember years ago when Ken Clarke was Health Minister and the BMA poster campaign 'What do you call a man who ignores medical advice?' well it still goes on. Only yesterday I heard someone from the Prison Officers' Association explaining how Mr Gove in his new Justice role won't listen to anyone about the state of prisons. I can't see this sort of political interference ending any time soon. I think the only way you'd probably enjoy teaching long term is to bite the bullet, do your PGCE and then work in the independent sector. I'm not suggesting that it's easy there but I think your subject would be more valued and parents more able to fund instruments and private lessons.

cat1978 wrote: »

PS sorry for long post, not sure if my waffle will help, but we're all rooting for you, and just want you to be happy being the person you are :):)

The only way you'll be able to change your life in the future is to let go of what you've done in the past. You've never said exactly what you actually did (not that it matters) but I'm assuming you had some sort of high-flying, well paid job which you didn't cope with so it made you ill and the into debt so your parents bailed you out. That's hardly criminal but I fail to see how wanting to return to living off your parents is going to help you move forward. So, you accepted their help when you needed it but you don't need it now. I agree with HBS that your parents are not helping by continually reminding you of past failure. It's as if because they footed the bill it gives them the right to keep harping on about it. That's not very nice in my book. Why not look at what you've managed to achieve since and in spite of all this rather than dwelling on what might have been. I hate trite phrases and clich!s but a bit of 'counting blessings' wouldn't go amiss.