Renovations and Repayments.

newgirly

Well said Amanda, my dd is spending Xmas day with her boyfriends family and my mum is shocked I'm ok about it ( I am a a bit Xmas obsessed ) it's not for me to dictate what she does and I would want to be the kind of parent that starts with the guilt tripping. You just make the best of what you do have.

Alex stick to your guns re early morning visits, it's a crazy expectation if your parents think that can continue. Their happiness does NOT rest on your shoulders.

maman

Pleased that everyone is in agreement about the early morning visits. Now we just have to get Alex to agree then it's sorted.:D

Don't fret about the holiday. LittleK will enjoy the beach and some simple things. Take him to buy bread and try a few words of Spanish. You'll be self catering some of the time so involve him in the food prep. Do some jigsaws or play board games. Just relax and enjoy being together and the sunshine!

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

"Serious discussions"? :rotfl:

I'm so glad you and MrsK managed to have a talk. You seem to be communicating much better now.

Funny 'un regarding kids - my mum said she would have been disappointed if I had been a boy. So your wife is not alone.

HBS x

:rotfl: Something like that. Well, not so serious ... yet.

We are trying.

My wife and I had quite a long conversation today about seeing our son as our child. As it turns out she thinks she would have been a good role model to a daughter and admitted she would have "tried much harder". Considering she thinks ill of how some cultures view their daughters as second to their sons I challenged her views about our son, it upset her but I hope this will make her think about her actions to our son.

amanda_p wrote: »

Christmas.......it really does send everyone into overdrive. I have two sons, one lives and works in Hong Kong the other a doctor in a London Hospital. Whilst it is lovely to have them both home for Christmas logistically it is not often possible. They are both married as well. The doctor is lucky if he can get any time off over Christmas and if he does I really don't mind where he spends it. The HK son was home for Christmas in 2015, but not 2016 and not this year either. This is due to a job move and the fact we have already seen him twice this year.
Does this matter.... no. I have friends that have 4 grown up sons and from when the friends were first married one year her parents, the next year his parents and so the cycle goes on.
Last year it was just my husband and I and it was absolutely fine, I didn't have to rush around being 'mum' and give the service all that entails. We have always said to both of them, you live your lives however you wish , we don't expect you here every Christmas without fail and don't feel you have to do the her parents, your parents bit. The doctor son is under enough stress and long hours without us, his parents, bleating that we must see you at Christmas, all that does is add to his stress levels.
It should be a time of goodwill, as long as my two are happy somewhere in the world that is fine by me. There is WhatsApp and Skype to keep in touch they do not have to be physically here. So many disputes and arguments over one day out of 365!
Alex please don't go to see your parents every morning, whatever they say or you perceive them to feel. As a parent this is totally unreasonable. Put a stop to it before it starts.

Your children are very lucky and I'm sure appreciate being given freedom in adulthood.

I agree over there being a lot of disputes and arguments over Christmas. I am not much a fan but have enjoyed it much more seeing my son excited over it.

My father talks to me about his past and also past regrets for hours every day. Mother has this all day long, everyday. Apparently he sometimes wakes her at night to tell here these things too. I suppose I'm just trying to help them.

newgirly wrote: »

Well said Amanda, my dd is spending Xmas day with her boyfriends family and my mum is shocked I'm ok about it ( I am a a bit Xmas obsessed ) it's not for me to dictate what she does and I would want to be the kind of parent that starts with the guilt tripping. You just make the best of what you do have.

Alex stick to your guns re early morning visits, it's a crazy expectation if your parents think that can continue. Their happiness does NOT rest on your shoulders.

I hadn't noticed you'd mentioned your daughter's boyfriend much and hoped everything was still OK with them.

:rotfl: Do you still love Christmas even now your children are growing up?

Your children are very lucky to have you.

I wish my parents would learn to make the most of being retired rather than wishing they were either still working in mother's case or dwelling on the past in father's. One of the reasons they've cited for needing to see me everyday is to monitor my state of mind. :rotfl:

AlexLK

maman wrote: »

Pleased that everyone is in agreement about the early morning visits. Now we just have to get Alex to agree then it's sorted.:D

Don't fret about the holiday. LittleK will enjoy the beach and some simple things. Take him to buy bread and try a few words of Spanish. You'll be self catering some of the time so involve him in the food prep. Do some jigsaws or play board games. Just relax and enjoy being together and the sunshine!

That's basically what my wife wants to do on holiday. We have been studying some Spanish words, maps of Spain and Spanish history over the summer.

Today my parents decided my wife and I needed to be lectured on how to look after the apartment. :mad: After father gave a 10 minute description of how to wash, dry and polish cutlery in the apartment my wife told him we've kept a house for long enough. Apparently they will be "inspecting" the apartment when they go over there in September. :rotfl:

AlexLK

August Targets:

Summer holiday plans: 1. Trip to R.W. 2. Holiday. Tomorrow! 3. Agricultural shows x 3.
Debts: Pay £1,000 (/ £3,000 to pay)Paid £3,000, sold the car we no longer wanted and IT'S GONE.
Total Grocery Spend: £240 / £400.
Keeping organised: 1. Electronically. 2. Paper diary. 3. Payments / invoices. 4. Teaching / course. 5. General business. Doing well on this front.
Spreadsheets / Money tracking: 1. July - bring up to date. Done. 2. Deal with every week in August. Also doing well.
De-clutter and Sell: 1. 2x watches, [STRIKE]1x car[/STRIKE]. 2. Go through one room and set things aside that need to go. Have given away some things my son no longer wants / needs.
Books read for pleasure: 1 / 3. Probably will read one on holiday too.
Prep tasks for course: 1 / 2.

kelpie35

Have a lovely holiday. Keep safe and take care.

newgirly

AlexLK wrote: »

:rotfl: Something like that. Well, not so serious ... yet.

We are trying.

My wife and I had quite a long conversation today about seeing our son as our child. As it turns out she thinks she would have been a good role model to a daughter and admitted she would have "tried much harder". Considering she thinks ill of how some cultures view their daughters as second to their sons I challenged her views about our son, it upset her but I hope this will make her think about her actions to our son.



Your children are very lucky and I'm sure appreciate being given freedom in adulthood.

I agree over there being a lot of disputes and arguments over Christmas. I am not much a fan but have enjoyed it much more seeing my son excited over it.

My father talks to me about his past and also past regrets for hours every day. Mother has this all day long, everyday. Apparently he sometimes wakes her at night to tell here these things too. I suppose I'm just trying to help them.



I hadn't noticed you'd mentioned your daughter's boyfriend much and hoped everything was still OK with them.

:rotfl: Do you still love Christmas even now your children are growing up?

Your children are very lucky to have you.

I wish my parents would learn to make the most of being retired rather than wishing they were either still working in mother's case or dwelling on the past in father's. One of the reasons they've cited for needing to see me everyday is to monitor my state of mind. :rotfl:

Morning Alex, yes I still love Xmas - only 129 days now

I hope you have a fantastic holiday, and manage to maintain high standards cutlery wise whilst there :rotfl:

heartbreak_star

Polish cutlery.

As if there's nothing better to do.

*sigh*

HBS x

maman

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Polish cutlery.

As if there's nothing better to do.

*sigh*

HBS x

:rotfl:


You could just buy fish and chips and eat with your fingers Alex, problem solved!:D


Have a great time.:A

hiddenshadow

Hope you have a lovely holiday.