The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

Islandmaid

monnagran wrote: »

Gosh Islandmaid: there is a cure for DS2 you know. I think its called infanticide. I'll stand as witness for the defence if you like.
I'll try to come back later. The whole family has to watch Bakeoff. It's autistic DGSs favourite programme and just about to start.

x

TEMPTING...VERY TEMPTING.... Am trying to be the serene swan - but by nature I am more of a goonie bird - on the positive side DS has eaten out at many lovely eating establishments on our beautiful Island and has some spectacularly expensive outfits.

On the negative side, I want to say bawls to him and remind him that he earns more than me and has NO outgoings, but he is my son, so he will be homed and sorted, but will have to severely reduce his social expectations ...... Who needs Christmas anyway (my savings pot) - humphhh...

(He feels guilty - tea has been offered 3 times since first post!!)

Nargleblast

Looks like reality has hit home with a vengeance, Islandmaid!

I am confident our lad will be ok, he is fairly sensible, but it won't stop us worrying about him. Nobody tells you, when you have kids, that the worry starts once you know you're pregnant, carries on through till birth, then continues on until they themselves are grandparents!

maryb

I now know that once you are a parent, you are only ever as happy as your least happy child

moneyistooshorttomention

Just had quick google as to current size of student loan - "up to £8,200 pa outside London". Last I knew was that, if grants were still paid they would equate to about £10,000pa (so, say, £10.5k per annum nowadays) and that's £2,300 x 3 extra debt straight off to make the loan up to former grant level = £6,900.

Then paying fees - and I guess that then brings debt on top of student loan up to over £20,000.

Put like that - it's not the would-be students fault if they land up in a heck of a lot of debt come the end of University (and that's over and above the student loan itself).

Without working it out in detail student loan + extra debt to bring them up to same financial circumstances as my generation had = over £30,000 of debt.:eek:

I can sympathise with those who are going to University for genuine University courses. I'm glad I'm not in their shoes.

Which reminds me - must see if tonight's installment of people doing some of our society's worse low-paid jobs is up on Iplayer yet. I've been watching the last two in horrified fascination and thinking "Thankgawd I never had one like that/I would have refused to do one like that". I was sitting there thinking "That must mean they get foot problems/leg problems/back problems/RSI/too shattered at the end of the day to get on with their Life in the evenings and that's just for starters" and "Lack of sleep for those queuing up at 7.30am in the morning just to see if they are actually going to get their work that day:eek:".

I wonder how those employers can look themselves in the eye in the mirror of a morning treating people that way:cool:

monnagran

The first time I left my baby with my parents they sent us off to the cinema. I was so anxious that I insisted on going home halfway through the film. Trying to explain to my mother why I couldn't leave my son for more than an hour I asked,"When does this feeling go away?" She said, "Oh, it never goes away. Never."

Fast forward 15/16 years and I would have given him away with a bowl of goldfish!

x

moneyistooshorttomention

:rotfl:Monna:rotfl:.

My mother would almost certainly agree with you. Which I find very odd considering that I'm now old enough for my hair to have turned white (and not because I decided to be fashionable and dye it white....:cool::().

She informed me the other day she would be popping back at intervals to keep an eye on me even after she's dead. Knowing her = she meant it too.

My response was that she could pop in occasionally if she liked - but I do expect her to respect my privacy and not make a habit of it and I regard her as having fulfilled all obligations to me by now - except being there to greet me when I die too in my turn in years to come:rotfl:

Floss

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Just had quick google as to current size of student loan - "up to £8,200 pa outside London". Last I knew was that, if grants were still paid they would equate to about £10,000pa (so, say, £10.5k per annum nowadays) and that's £2,300 x 3 extra debt straight off to make the loan up to former grant level = £6,900.

Then paying fees - and I guess that then brings debt on top of student loan up to over £20,000.

Put like that - it's not the would-be students fault if they land up in a heck of a lot of debt come the end of University (and that's over and above the student loan itself).

Without working it out in detail student loan + extra debt to bring them up to same financial circumstances as my generation had = over £30,000 of debt.:eek:

I can sympathise with those who are going to University for genuine University courses. I'm glad I'm not in their shoes...

On the other hand, how much has the subsidised higher education system of pre-loan years cost the economy? Since the "family silver" of state industries & organisations such as steel, telephones, water & other utilities was sold off to create private companies, there are few sources of income for the Treasury to share out, so it's inevitable that investment in the future has to be made by others, in this case by students. I know of families where youngsters have chosen not to go to uni until either they been able to put some money behind them or to begin their working life instead.

Softstuff

I started saving for uni as a child, most of my Christmas and birthday gifts. I started work as soon as I was able alongside school , thanks to insurance that was actually on my 16th birthday. I had a Saturday job, but also during summer and other holidays I was a waitress and chambermaid at a small hotel. At uni during the first year I didn't work termtime, but worked holidays back at the hotel, adding in barmaid since I'd turned 18. Year 2 of uni I got a weekend job, with sales commission and I was quite good, still working holidays too. Year 3 was a paid placement, 50 quid a week plus room. I saved a lot that year... working 60 unsociable hard hours a week on split shifts with an hours travel to digs didn't leave much shopping time. Year 4 I didn't work. Working didn't affect my school grades, 4 A's at A level, but I'd have likely had higher than a 2.1 at uni if I hadn't partied so much :rotfl:. I left uni with savings.

I do wonder what my experience would have been like if I'd had parents with some money to support me, but in any case it was, and still is, doable. Now fees have gone up, chances are I'd have had a small loan (or less drink!).

Renovation here continues. Nuff said. Toe is still broken and I have a UTI too. And stress, much stress.

greenbee

Softstuff - I spoke to the builder today about coming back to do snagging and plan the next bit of work. I did say how nice it had been not having him there

Softstuff

greenbee wrote: »

Softstuff - I spoke to the builder today about coming back to do snagging and plan the next bit of work. I did say how nice it had been not having him there

:rotfl:
I've got a nice bottle of wine to open Friday, which is hopefully when we see the last of my present chap.... other than socially, since he is my best friends husband.

Yesterday's drama involved a torch. We'd had my lovely electrician in a couple of days ago for 2 new down lights and the removal of a large heated bathroom ceiling light. A bit of a difficult location, considering all the air conditioning stuff in the roof space. He managed thanks to the large hole in the ceiling. In any case, it appeared he'd left his torch behind in the ceiling. He called the contractor asking ifnit had already been patched. The contractors suggestions to me were either opening up the ceiling again or taking off some roof tiles from outside :eek: needless to say I went postal. Said torch was retrieved in the end by some acrobatic work by him going through the roof space. I suggested that if the electrician made a habit of this, he needs to buy cheaper torches.... This one including battry, $400!