The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

monnagran

Hi all. I've just returned from a couple of days spent with friends on another part of the Island. My friend and I spent the 2 days shopping, prepping, cooking, serving and clearing up after a lunch for 60. It is usually done by a team of 4 but apparently 3 of them couldn't make it yesterday so we did it between us. It was a bit hot (!) But great fun.

When we finally got back to her house we spent a couple of hours sitting under a huge chestnut tree looking over the most fabulous view over fields to the sea beyond. Behind us one of their fields was being baled by a father and son team and my friend's husband carried out a tray of tea and cake for us. Honestly, I felt that I had been transported back in time, it was like a scene from 'Darling buds of May'.
While I was there one of their pet sheep had to be put down and there were tears!
Fabulous people, fabulous house, lucky, lucky me to be their friend.
Their home is the epitome of MSE. I have described it on here before but it is a converted stables. Converted by them as my friends husband was a builder. They have lived there over 40 years and I think the most modern thing in the house is the electric cooker which dates from the 1950s.

I must stop or I'll be writing another essay.

Now I must go back and read the posts I've missed. I see we have a couple of newcomers. Are you mad? Do you know what you've let yourselves in for? Welcome anyway.

Let the fun begin.

x

carolbee

Don't stop Monnagran, I want to hear more about that fab house!

I always lurk on here, in fact I lurk a lot of places, and enjoy the chats that go on, must do better and contribute,if I think I have something worth while to say.

monnagran

Carolbee, you don't know what you are saying. I could write a book about that particular family!

Don't worry, I won't do it on here.

x

nursemaggie

I am sure we would all love to hear it monna everyone loves your posts.

Hope you are feeling a little better today ivyleaf

Hard_Up_Hester

I've done a couple of hours at DD's, tomorrow I going armed with rubber gloves and a flame thrower!

I'm now waiting for someone to visit me and pay me some money, then I'm making a start on the decorating.

Glad you had a good time away Monna, Ivyleaf, I hope you feel better soon.

Tips&treats, I've done some work on my family tree, but most of my roots go back to Ireland and there they disappear.

Carlobee, I never have anything worth saying, but I don't let it stop me from waffling on.

Floss

Hester, most Irish genealogy records were destroyed in the Uprising in 1922, we can't trace DH's family back any further than that date.

Tipsntreats

Hi all,
I did not intend for this to be a daily post (makes me sound like a news paper ha ha), but we will see.
Obviously, I am a bit lost on some posts but I'll find my niche.
As for as having too much on my plate. I am hoping to share my mistakes with you all, so hopefully others can learn from them. I was living half the time at my home, and the other half at my Mothers (Isle of Wight) for more than 3 years, until she passed away. Mum was diagnosed with Cancer, as she was living alone, I naturally wanted to support her. I have a sister who lives on the IW, she offered to do Mum's cleaning and shopping at the beginning. To my outrage, she charged Mum, not only her bus fare, but for cleaning! Foolish Mum, gave sis her credit card and pin no, and she went on a spending spree! I had to put a stop to that! So locks were changed on house, pin was changed, and I found some private help for Mum, much cheaper than her own daughter!
Naturally this caused me to fall out with my only sister. (My younger brother died years ago from cancer, part of the reason I moved from Kent to Dorset, to spend as much time as I could with him).
So it was down to me to take Mum to all appointments, nurse her through chemo etc.
That Big C, just kept coming back in different types, until last year, just as I had returned home, Mum called to say she was going into a hospice as the pain was too bad.
I was back and forth(cost a fortune on those ferries). I asked the staff to call me day or night if they felt it was the end, they did, and was there for Mums last breath. Now, I believe that no-one she be alone when they are leaving this world, as it is frightening. During that time, my sister just stayed away. I had to send a txt with the awful news, as she would't answer her phone.
It has taken me a long time to sell her house (left to the grandchildren), and I have another post about my dissapointment on charity shops for the furniture. My sister was cut out from Mums will, however, I do get a little money.
When the house was sold, I had just a week to clear it. I hired a removals firm and booked a storage unit in my area. I thought that I could sell the contents, and reap back my costs WRONG!
What else could I have done? I could not tip good stuff, and the tip only allows so much,
The cost of the storage has doubled, only a little left now. I can't bring it to my rented flat, as we have a damp and mould problem, and environmental health are coming for another inspection next week, along with the agent.
Now if that is not enough, I inherited (my joke) two relatives. My Uncle(Mums brother),who was in a home on the IW. He has schizophrenia and dementia,started to self harm when Mum died. So I have moved him to my area at his request, lost the plot now. He never married and has no children. My Grandmother asked me to promise I would take care of him, when I was only 17, no I understand.
The other is my Mums cousin, she also has mental health problems, as well as dementia. She was living in my birth town Windsor. She stopped eating and drinking at the news of my Mother, and was rushed to hospital. Another back and forth trip, until she asked to move into a home near me. She also never married and has no children. I am NOK for both of those realtives, passed to me when Mum died.
So there you have it, am I in the right forum?
Oh forgot to say, I have adult twins (still at home), they were born premature.One of them has cerebral palsy (not that bad), I am his carer as he needs constant care.
TT

Hard_Up_Hester

Thanks Floss, I knew the records weren't available but didn't realise why.

T&T, yes you have got a lot on your plate, definitely.

The china search lady arrived, collected my unwanted china and paid me money that I promptly went out and spent on socks for the DGC. When I went to help with the school run this morning there was a huge bag of mismatched socks and not a pair to be found. Each child now has 8 pairs of identical socks!

On with the painting next.

Ellen_Dalton

That is precisely what I thought! This is the thing that I like about these strings, you converse with people and really don't know anything about them!

Hard_Up_Hester

Apart from me Ellen, everyone knows way more about me than they want to.