Teenagers Allowance

zagfles

Serendipitious wrote: »

An interesting thread.

My DD got herself a Saturday job at 15 in a food store then moved on at 16 to an independent pub/restaurant and by 6th form she was working most weekends and holidays in a branch of a national chain of restaurants. I drove her there and collected her from all of these. She did so well there that they wanted her to take their management training when she left school, but her mind was fixed on university, so she declined that and went to Uni and within a fortnight had landed a weekend job at another national chain, a job that saw her through the entire three years, plus giving her as much fulltime as she wanted during holidays. When she returned home after Uni, they simply transferred her to a local branch so she never had to look for a job from scratch on leaving university (she got a 2:1.) Within her first few months of fulltime employment she had found something better, an office based admin job, and from there she moved on to the organisation she now works for, where she has become a manager.

I never asked her to get any of those early jobs, she simply said she wanted to earn her own money so I let her get on with it. I never charged her any board or keep whilst at home.

She funded her degree via the student loan scheme, and I helped where I could when visiting her at Uni by letting her loose with a trolley in the supermarket two or three times a term. (Talk about bulk-buying, I'd never seen anything like it!!) When she came home I helped with a car deposit and she took care of her car finance herself and moved in with her boyfriend within a year of her return. They're married now and the student loan is history, paid off by her own efforts.

She never had an allowance and never asked for one though she did have pocket money till she got her first job. (I was a single working mum so I guess she recognised I was already doing as much as I could.)

Anyhow, in her case, the work/study combination all worked out just fine. I'm proud of her.

And so you should be! I think the main point I get from your story is that she went at her pace, it was her decision to get the job and how she did things. You didn't push her into it, or threaten to stop her pocket money unless she got a job etc. I certainly wouldn't stand in my DD's way if she wanted to get a job. But at the moment she want to focus on her studies.

Kids should be left to develop at their own pace, rather than follow some regimented timeline for development (eg must get potty trained at 2, must get job at 16, must move out at 18 etc).

Also to give them support and not stand in their way just because of parental fear etc. For instance, we used to regularly leave our kids home alone when they were younger - at around 8-9 years old for maybe 20-30 mins or so, and when 12+ for hours. Because they were happy to be left, and we knew they were sensible enough not to do anything stupid, and how to get help in an emergency.

They've also always walked or got the bus to school (with us at primary and on their own at secondary) and friends' houses etc rather than being ferried around everywhere, giving them the confidence to travel without adults. Whereas friends' of theirs are always being ferried everywhere and wouldn't have a clue how to get around town using public transport.

Development comes at different paces in different areas. I was proud of my DD when at 14 years old she travelled 200 miles by train involving 2 changes on her own. These sort of skills and confidence are as if not more important for the adult world as work experience.

onlyroz

zagfles wrote: »

When I got a job I found I had far more free time than when at uni, weekends were actually totally mine, it was bliss, no pressure to study!

Same here. I remember my first spring after graduating - I was actually able to go outside and see the sun, instead of sitting inside revising for some exam or other.

Buzzybee90

onlyroz wrote: »

Same here. I remember my first spring after graduating - I was actually able to go outside and see the sun, instead of sitting inside revising for some exam or other.

You're right there, I'm pretty sure I didn't have down time without feeling horribly guilty for the 4 months or so I was non-stop working on my dissertation. Revision is terrible because as much as you do, you still feel you can do more!

zagfles

Jagraf wrote: »

Have a look at selection requirements, relating to GMC guidelines. There's a whole range of attributes that they select prospective students by, not just health related.

And not just work related either. But for the "work experience"I think the specific bit under the heading "Work Experience" on the "Entry Requirements" tab is the most relevant

The more you have experience of or in, the better. You stand more chance of getting into med school that way. So yes, non health related experience is useful.

Plus of course non work related experience. I remember when I went for interviews the interviewers were just as if not more interested in my travels than in my work experience.

I would never judge anyone's ability to make tea. But I would expect them to work as part of a team, even with the rubbishy bits.

Someone I know got a reference from a previous employer which included something like "he makes excellent tea". He was livid, talk about damning with faint praise :rotfl:

Jagraf

We will have to agree to differ then. I find the selection process which relates to skills required just as important. It's good to see the whole picture, and it does come under entry requirements.

I did my degree whilst working, so I was used to it. When I graduated I continued to work full time and did a post grad, so I suppose my experiences are different from yours.

I agree that reference is really damning. Never seen anything like that in a reference I've received.

I'm sure all our kids will be fine and dandy.

zagfles

Jagraf wrote: »

We will have to agree to differ then. I find the selection process which relates to skills required just as important. It's good to see the whole picture, and it does come under entry requirements.

I did my degree whilst working, so I was used to it. When I graduated I continued to work full time and did a post grad, so I suppose my experiences are different from yours.

I agree that reference is really damning. Never seen anything like that in a reference I've received.

I'm sure all our kids will be fine and dandy.

Yup, and don't me wrong, work experience can be a helpful thing to put on a CV, but then so can lots of other "extra curricular" activites, for instance travel. Independant travel shows a level of initiative and drive, after all there are plenty of grown adults who would never dare go abroad except on a package holiday with a rep to hold their hand.

But that's not to say travel is for everyone, I'm not advocating everyone goes backpacking round the world, and equally not everyone will want a job in a chippy. Kids can demonstrate their skills and initiative in lots of different ways.

Jagraf

I would see travelling or working in a chippie as equal.

Homeownertobe

Ziggazee wrote: »

In my day we left school at 16 and got a job.

A lot of things happened in 'your day' that more enlightened people wouldn't consider right.

I feel your posts on here are more than enough evidence to make the counter argument to your own.;)

suki1964

Im of the generation that left school at 16 and went out to work, with no ideas of going to uni

I was also from a one parent family so there was no cash for pocket money/ allowances. I started work at 13 doing a three mile paper round 7 days a week before school. At 14 I got a Saturday job in woollies, I still kept my paper round. I've always have had to earn my money and make my way in life

Hubby was from quite an affluent back ground, yet he too was never given money, he too had to earn, from washing cars and selling eggs his hens laid and veg he grew

However when his daughter lived with us during her mid teens,we gave her a monthly allowance. It was her child benefit She had a free bus pass which covered travel and took a pack lunch to school. We paid for uniforms, essential clothes and shoes. Her Christmas and birthday pressies were clothes she wanted but were out of her price band. Her allowance was for her phone, her social life and all the things teenagers want. If she wanted more she had to take on a chore in the house and was "paid"

She is now very good with money having had to learn to budget with what she was given. She will never be rich but she gets by each month bringing up a young family, paying her rent on time, feeding and clothing the kids and keeping them warm. We help out now and then, we paid her driving lessons and bought her a decent car, pay for an oil top up during the winter months

It's still a strange feeling for both of us, giving the kids financial support, after they have both long since left education. Because we never had a penny help when we were young and we had to do it all ourselves we do sometimes have to say to ourselves, they need the help now not when they are in their later years when we are dead and buried.

We are in no means well off, yet are so much better off then our parents were at our age as I would think so many of us are. It's easier now to be able to support children longer in their lives, and if you can afford it, then why not

Spendless

Jagraf wrote: »

Zagfles,thanks for all the info. I'm wondering how much of the Cambridge Uni link you actually read.

It stated that some work experience in a related field would be helpful - of course it would. We are not bound to only work in chippies, but it would be great to have a range of attributes.

I was more interested in the GMCs What Makes a Good Doctor, which gives a raging of skills needed, obviously a medical degree just being one of them.

Personally I haven't got a problem with the whole tea making issue, I have made tea and had it made for me. Nothing like a good cuppa.

I've a 15yo son on an 'access to medicine scheme' run by a nearby University as his Secondary school participates in it. He's on his 2nd year there. At the presentation evening when he first got on it, there was talks from a recently qualified Dr, one with several years experience and another retired Consultant. Something said if you want to work in that profession was get used to coping with/liking elderly people and lots of poo (expression used, as talks were aimed at 13 year olds and keeping them engaged). Cleaning toilets and working in a nursing home would be relevant.