Benefit and help entitlement (Housing benefit)

sam25

Heres the situation.

- Living in a 3 bedroom house with 3 people living here including myself. It is owned by 1 of the family members here.

- 2 of the bedrooms are used, the 3rd bedroom was another family members who passed away a few years ago. This cannot be used as a bedroom due to it being filled with memories of the family member who passed away and my mothers medical equipment (who is terminally ill).

- My room is in the dining room. A huge patio door/window leading to outside is on 1 wall. It leaks water (mould all over the ceiling and walls) even though it has been replaced many times. Due to that patio window the room gets boiling hot like a greenhouse during the summer and as cold as outside in the winter (can see myself breathe).

I claim carers allowance and income support combined (£420 a month). This is for helping the other family member here (who owns the house) with my mothers care.

My own health has been suffering and I have both Social Anxiety and Depression. I am a very nervous person.

My quality of life is worse because of this house. Neither family members support me with my problems. Due to my mothers illness she can get quite nasty, twist what I tell her in confidence and then tell people i'm lazy and nothing but trouble. The other family member is elderly and are very dismissive because they have gone past a point of caring about anything. (plenty more I could say on this but you get the idea, let's just say its not easy seeing 1 family member have a terminal illness and going downhill each day when I was a kid, then another family member is suffering the same fate).

I realise that 1 of the main causes for my health problems is living here. Over the years I have had medication and counselling but nothing has worked because the source of the problem (living here) is still there.

Here's the main dilemma....

So I need to move out. I would still provide the required amount of care to my mother to allow me to continue claiming carers allowance, yet £420 a month simply isn't enough to just get a flat through a letting agent.

The options are limited.

As i'm under 35, I read that I can only claim housing benefit for a bedsit or shared house? Is this correct? Health wise neither of these would be suitable.

The only other option is to be put on the council housing list. Based on the above, am I likely to be put as a higher priority? What sort of council tax discount could I expect?

Thanks and sorry for the long post

Caz3121

sam25 wrote: »

As i'm under 35, I read that I can only claim housing benefit for a bedsit or shared house? Is this correct? Health wise neither of these would be suitable.

It is not the fact that you can only claim for shared accommodation but the fact that the amount you will qualify for will be based on the shared accommodation rate. You can choose to live in non-shared accommodation and you will receive the same amount of housing benefit and you need to supplement this with your other benefits
Many landlords will not accept people on benefits (their mortgage and/or insurance company may have clauses on this) do you have a deposit?

there are some exceptions to the shared rate eg if you receive DLA/PIP for care and require an overnight carer yourself
You mention your health problems but not that you receive any health related benefits

examples of exceptions
http://www.manchester.gov.uk/info/200008/benefits_and_support/4249/local_housing_allowance/7

restless6

You get a 25 per cent single person discount on council tax.

Do you receive DLA ? This will give you a higher disregard too.

sam25

Thanks for the input both.

That's good news then that I would still receive something. I feel that for progress I would need a small 1 bedroom house in the countryside (Which are normally less desirable on the council list?) with a smaller overall community so I can ease myself into smaller social situations.

As for DLA... Nope. A lot of that is down the the NHS and government not taking mental health problems seriously. I was on ESA a while back yet ATOS decided to put an end to that and leave me with no choice but to claim Carers Allowance (which costs the government more money).

As for the NHS, I have rarely been taken seriously. Once I was given counselling which didn't work and another time citalopram for what they claimed is "mild depression".

The reality though is SA and depression both ruin my life. I'm never given a chance with a job because of how I come across, i'm a nervous wreck when I leave the house which can often mean i'm made fun of by people. I can't make eye contact with anyone, am physically nervous even when standing in a queue to buy something. I avoid things like dental treatment (even though I would get it for free) because when I have been before, I have been so nervous and it's rather embarrassing when a dental nurse has to hold my head still due to nervous shaking just show the dentist can look in my mouth.

Due to being fobbed off by NHS GP's, I have had to get witness statements from people that know me and know what i'm going through. Even so, the last time I went (a few weeks back), the GP couldn't be bothered to read them and the only help I received was a print out with information about a book I can read to help myself.

The lack of ability due to SA then causes the depression side of things (because of having fun poked towards me, realising how much I am missing out on, etc) so I end up sometimes drinking alcohol to self medicate and get rid of my SA symptoms so I can cope with town without being nervous.

FBaby

Unfortunately, there are no miracle treatment for social anxiety. The only way you are going to get better is by facing your fears slowly and gradually so that you realise that you can actually face the world and start enjoying it. Only you can do it though, with the help of counselling.

You do need to prepare yourself as the more you isolate yourself, the worse it will become, the harder it will be to make the plunge to face your fears and you won't be able to be a carer forever, so you really need to tackle it now to give you time to take small steps towards recovery.

It is hard to face one's fears, very hard, but those who put themselves through it are those who come out the other side successfully. Counselling can provide you with tips and help you with motivation, but if you don't force yourself to go out and face the world, no-one will be able to take your anxieties away.

BigAunty

sam25 wrote: »

The only other option is to be put on the council housing list. Based on the above, am I likely to be put as a higher priority?

Shelter and the Direct Gov website has excellent information about applying for social housing. You really need to review the social housing allocation policies of the social housing landlords (housing association and local councils).

The highest priority groups (advice applies to England so please tell us if that's not the case) are the homeless (those with no security of tenure past the 28 days) with dependents or disabilities. They go through an emergency homeless route and aren't necessarily going to get social housing, they may just get a 1 year private tenancy. In some areas, virtually all of the vacant properties go to this group. In many areas, the majority of properties are usually allocated to them.

For general applicants (on the waiting list or choice based letting at lower priority), the social housing landlord may very well prioritise those with sickness, disability or inadequately housed (such as damp or overcrowded). So check the policies and apply. In England, social housing providers have a little bit of discretion in their policies so they vary from landlord to landlord and they will all have different bands and criteria. Good luck.

sam25 wrote: »

. I feel that for progress I would need a small 1 bedroom house in the countryside (Which are normally less desirable on the council list?) with a smaller overall community so I can ease myself into smaller social situations.

All social housing properties are generally highly desirable - there's hardly any supply and huge demand, with millions on the social housing waiting list, most unlikely to ever secure a property.

When you say a '1 bedroom house' , do you mean a 1 bedroom property, such as a flat? There's not really much provision of 1 bed houses at all.

Many landlords will not rent to tenants claiming HB. Some of those who do, will only do so if they can offer a guarantor (someone in employment and/or owning a house) who will pay the rent if the tenant defaults. Landlords that do accept HB claimants are less likely to accept someone as a tenant whose HB doesn't fully cover the rent as they will worry the tenant is stretching themselves too thin.

It is a pity that the anti-depressants and counselling you've had have not been effective. I can see how a change of environment would lift your mood. That said, anxiety promotes disordered thinking and the sufferer will take their thoughts wherever they go. However, I can see why your morale would be sapped where you are.

Have you thought about changing your GP? Have you contacted Mind? Have you looked into whether there might be a charity locally that provides free or cheap counselling to see if you can find a therapist with a style of counselling or relationship with them that better suits you? Have you found a supportive community online, one dedicated to sufferers of anxiety and depression? Are there any local support groups near you, including for the conditions that you suffer or dedicated to supporting carers or problem drinnking?

Have you re-applied for disability or sickness benefits or appealed the decisions? Sought out assistance from CAB or similar charities to support you in filling in the forms?

Also, remember the Samaritans are there for anyone experiencing a personal crisis - they can give you a sympathetic ear.

sam25

Thanks,

In all honesty I have tried everything RE the social anxiety, forums, samaritans. Actually the forums are WORSE for SA due to the amount of moaners on there who complain that SA makes them unable to get a girlfriend. Then when someone who has serious problems comes along, people don't give any cares. As a member for more than 7 years on SA forums I have been told "if you don't like it, shut up and stop moaning" and "Oh well, you have a girlfriend, not reading any more of your post". The samaritains were very patronising.

FBaby, exactly. I'm aware of that completely. However being in this house amplifies it. I get made to feel so small and low here that each time I am out in public I am a nervous wreck. I also have no independence and would just like to have a clean break and a chance.

Unfortunately facing the world and getting used to it is not an option because at current it makes me worse.

Let's take a year or so ago. I decided to make a new start of things. I went to town and intended to put myself in social situations. I soon realised that half the general public are not understanding of things. I tried making new friends but ended up being bullied. People made fun of my nervousness, my slight stutter, my on edge movements. 1 person even said "You been on drugs?". When I replied and explained things to them I was told "Yeah right, you clearly have". That evening I was so low with what had happened I tried to take my own life.

Been through MIND who were no good really. Without being signed off by a DR, I can't claim disability benefits. No local charity's and no SA related groups (closest is around 100 miles away and I have no way to get there or back). Drinking isn't a problem for me, I only drink to control my SA when out and about. At home I don't drink at all.

In general I am made to feel very incapable at home which is the sole cause of my SA. Earlier for example my mother asked me to plug her phone charger in. I plugged it in, yet in her head she saw it wasn't plugged in fully. She told me to double check, I did, all was fine. Then as soon as I left the room she told the other family member that I hadn't plugged it in correctly, who checked and confirmed it was all plugged in. I'm always doubted and made to feel incapable by my own family.

So, my SA certainly isn't in the head as such or my way of thinking. It's caused because of the way I am treated by my own family and others. DR's refuse to see this.

Thanks for the advice BigAunty regarding housing. I will look into some of the things you mentioned. As for 1 bedroom houses. According to the local council housing figures, in the last year 27 1 bed houses in the countryside were let. Each had between 1 and 6 bids on each. So it seems the demand for 1 bed country village properties isn't that high.

FBaby

FBaby, exactly. I'm aware of that completely. However being in this house amplifies it. I get made to feel so small and low here that each time I am out in public I am a nervous wreck. I also have no independence and would just like to have a clean break and a chance.

Without coming across as patronisingt, it really isn't my intention, but some people could say that you being able to claim benefits and HB for years has been giving you a chance. I understand what you are saying, that it would help to be under less stress in your home to have more resources to face your anxieties. However, it doesn't work like that because the moment you are under less pressure, the less incentive you have to deal with the stressors in your life. The other side of it is if you are under pressure to make changes in your life, and then confront your fears, and finally find that you are better able to cope with these stressors, you then find yourself with more resources to change the other stressors of your life. When it is YOU who trigger those changes rather than relying on others to do so, you get stronger and stronger.

Unfortunately facing the world and getting used to it is not an option because at current it makes me worse

It is common for going backwards at first before it gets better. That's why so many people give up and go back to their previous condition.

et's take a year or so ago. I decided to make a new start of things. I went to town and intended to put myself in social situations

This is where you need help and support. If you want to conquer your social phobia, the worse thing you can do is start by going out in town around total strangers. It's jumping straight in the deep end. You need to take small steps forward, starting with more welcoming environments until you are confortable with these.

So, my SA certainly isn't in the head as such or my way of thinking. It's caused because of the way I am treated by my own family and others. DR's refuse to see this.

SA is always in one's head. Your family might not be helping the situation, but they are not controlling it either, you are.The exemple you give wouldn't affect most people, it affects you because of your low self-esteem.

I genuinely wish you good luck, but don't dismiss everything people tell you. They might not totally understand what you are going through, but they are the people who can help you and you might surprised how trying to take their advice might show positive results.

misspickle_2

FBaby wrote: »

Without coming across as patronisingt, it really isn't my intention, but some people could say that you being able to claim benefits and HB for years has been giving you a chance. I understand what you are saying, that it would help to be under less stress in your home to have more resources to face your anxieties. However, it doesn't work like that because the moment you are under less pressure, the less incentive you have to deal with the stressors in your life. The other side of it is if you are under pressure to make changes in your life, and then confront your fears, and finally find that you are better able to cope with these stressors, you then find yourself with more resources to change the other stressors of your life. When it is YOU who trigger those changes rather than relying on others to do so, you get stronger and stronger.

It is common for going backwards at first before it gets better. That's why so many people give up and go back to their previous condition.


This is where you need help and support. If you want to conquer your social phobia, the worse thing you can do is start by going out in town around total strangers. It's jumping
straight in the deep end. You need to take small steps forward, starting with more welcoming environments until you are confortable with these.


SA is always in one's head. Your family might not be helping the situation, but they are not controlling it either, you are.The exemple you give wouldn't affect most people, it affects you because of your low self-esteem.

I genuinely wish you good luck, but don't dismiss everything people tell you. They might
not totally understand what you are going through, but they are the people who can help you and you might surprised how trying to take their advice might show positive results.

This is a great post fbaby and brilliantly put :T
Listen to it op because its your only way out.

It does sound like you really need some support op but support is just that. Support! You have to seek the advice and be brave enough to follow it.
Change your gp and get somebody to take you seriously.
It sounds like you have a plan now! That's a great start. Follow it through!
You keep going and going now and make people listen.
There are landlords out there that will take you on. I promise you. But you have to go out and find them.
The majority of people are nice decent understanding people.
When you come across people who make you feel bad about yourself in town etc then remove yourself from that particularly person. Don't remove yourself from life. Just remove yourself from that one situation.
When decent knowledgeable people can see that you are trying and willing then they will be happy to help you.
Could you ring a few letting agents today and put your name on a few lists. Explain the situation briefly to them. Keep it brief but cover the main points. Have a bit of faith and you may just find that something comes of it. Just have a go. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. The first phone call might be hard but by the time you ring the 4th 5th and 6th agent you'll be a dab hand at it! Each call will get easier. And you will learn so much info along the way that pretty soon you will be on here offering great advice to other people in your situation because you will have been through it.
All the best.
Good luck x

sam25

Not exactly. I was unaware of my options. If anything I didn't know any different. Plus I was very sceptical about moving out because I knew how much it would upset my mother and even make her illness worse.

I had been unaware of certain reasons behind it and dr's would almost be different each time I saw them. (1 minute its stress, then nothing, the next its mild depression, then 2 weeks later theres nothing wrong with me).

Well I do think it definitely would. If anything less pressure is happening in my current situation. I don't have to pay rent, I get the use of all household appliances, no bills to worry about, mostly free food. Yet the price I pay is being a carer for more than 35 hours a week and being made to feel useless by family members that live here. So to avoid that I spend nearly all my free time in my bedroom. My own place in the way I would like would mean dealing with people (when ordering furniture or going to DIY places to make it nicer as a side project) and having to do everything for myself.

I have had to do it all in my life regardless. No friends, nobody to help me out. I have even had to go for a general anaesthetic operation that required me to have someone accompany me, yet I had nobody who could so had to go on my own and stay in over night instead of going home the same day.

I can't agree with it always being in someone's head and perhaps this is exactly what the dr's don't understand. The way i'm made to feel at home is a literal thing (This has gone on for many years, even as a kid I was always accused of things I didn't do). Walking down the street and having gangs of teenagers shout some verbal abuse at me is a literal thing. Being beat up on several occasions on nights out due to being an easy target as I was on my own, is a literal thing. I could list more than 1000 things (not even kidding).

There was certainly no low self esteem. In fact it was the opposite. Yet because of the way I was brought up (as a wimp and even if I only defended myself, I would be in trouble or blamed by my family) I was left unable to defend myself in situations and became a nervous person.

Thus while it's like this I just want the chance to man up, have my own responsibilities and undo a lot of how I was and still am made to feel.

As another quick example then. I'm nearly 30 and a few years ago I was put through what could be classed as domestic abuse. When I had put myself out of the situation a distant family member knew what happened and made a threat to that person (even though I told them not to). The police turned up at both our doors and after they had left, my mother (Who claimed to have understood what I went through and was made aware that I told them not to threaten that person) phoned the distant family member and his family, apologised on my behalf and said she's sorry for the trouble I have caused them. I did nothing wrong though. Plus a few days later she was talking behind my back saying that I must have done something to deserve it and she wished she could say sorry to the person because no doubt it would have been my own fault.

This is what I mean when I say nobody at all understands. It's far from me deciding I want to rent a cheap council house to try and have it easier or thinking it might put me in better health. This is about knowing without a doubt that I will 100% be in better health and finally start having the life I want.

"but don't dismiss everything people tell you" - In truth it's been the opposite. I have listened to so much advice through SA forums, people who believe they know what my situation is and even DR's. Yet why is it, after 10 whole years after first going for help that I am actually worse health wise than I ever have been?


Edit:

Letting agents are not ideal. All in my area require 2 months rent upfront, plus between a £50 and £90 admin fee. The rate of Housing benefit I would get would be £220 a month yet the average rental price is £470 (So already i'm only left with barely £40 a week to cover water/gas/electric, food, public transport, 75% of council tax)

misspickle_2

Oh lordy lord Sam. It sounds miserable. So what are we going to do with you then?
You can't carry on the way you are that's for sure.
I can assure you THERE IS a landlord that would take you on. Forget all the gumpf that's written. It does exist and it IS out there. And I won't have anyone tell me any different because I know I'm right. I'd bet anyone that I could find it for you.
But after your last post I'm worried that the whole moving thing is more fantasy to you rather than reality and possibility.
Try to write down on here your 5 top concerns.
You have a lot going on so its not all that easy to decipher a starting point.
In reality what is it that you really want? Your own home? Or a better family? Which is it.
You will get support on here Sam. Just be patient and try to get straight to the heart of things. What is it that YOU want. Tell us.