Debt Free - am I

HappyNow

Hello, I've just had a quick updating snoop on your diary

Saturday sounds hideous - poor you. I hope today was better - if it wasn't then I think you need to have a serious think about the impact of the visits on your own wellbeing. But let's wait for your update before we go any further into that!

I see you've had lots of lovely help with your soa, and the only thing I haven't seen mentioned is your water bill. Maybe it's a regional thing (I'm ooop Norf), but £69 per month?! :eek: Have you checked into having a meter fitted - it might be a lot cheaper as there's only the two of you.

As for Asda baked beans - they're fine, but do you know which are even better?? Asda smartprice ones!! Seriously, they're brilliant!

Aaleigha

Happy Now YES I do have water rates to add - thank you I had not noticed I had missed them off - this time of year is a bit difficult as its only 10months out of 12 like council tax and then I have a few once a year (DH fishing Liceince which I have not included - perhaps I need a hobby allowance)

and as for the impact on me today was a good visit

the routine was the same - but I wore shoes that I knew would need to come off - and still wore watch and same jewellery - took long cardi off and walking stick went through and given back to me immediately not like saturday then the pat down search - and all was well - the office was kind and polite and twice stopped to ask me if I was ok or should she move to my daughter then back to me - (I did hear - while we were waiting - that the next person was told to pick her feet up too check the soles of her feet and to open her mouth and to take her hair down )

then the fun bit for the first time I met a sniffer dog - he was beautiful but sadly stopped at me - to which I just said hello - daugher went its ok she has 6 dogs - handler said it would not make a differrence - the dog continued to sniff then moved to the next person - I am sure it was where last time I wore the top I had codrydamol in the pocket - (and I wash using washing balls on cool) I imagine not all the codeine was washed out - ooops
so mostly a good day - he did not hug me when I got there (he always does when his dad is there) and right at the end when he hugged me he asked when I would start to send in the money =- he was told in a stern voice it would be at the beginning of the month - he wanted it send 15 three times a month (well 2x15 - 1x 20) but that would add to the cost due to postage and told him no at his age he would have to manage his own money - as that is what I am trying to do - his sister told him to grow up and be thankful for the fact I am willing to give anything and dont make demands - thank you daughter and she reminded him about how expensive a visit was especially as he gets through about 10 quid in chocolate and crisps each time we go she was costing it out to show him how much it actually was

now as for the baked beans NO not like heinz but totally acceptable - so one change will be made

apart from son today was a no spend day
daughter picked up her dog food and gave me all but a fiver - will put that into a pot and only use it if I need to - if not it is there to go towards my allowance for march.
so today a really good day off for a read

Aaleigha

If I had to choose a word for today it would be peaceful - for once my brain is calm

yesterday was not as stressful as many visits but I was still stressed today needs be be a day of calm

on the agenda is
making a loaf of marmite bread (daughter pinched the other yesterday)
doing dinner - liver sausages bacon and onion gravy make a couple of portions for mother in law (she has more money than us but needs a few meals a week made just because she wants to stay in her own home and she is finding it difficult)

then this afternoon I hope to do a bit of time in the bathroom thowing all the things we wont use and prehaps putting all the things on the window sill in the cabinet - but I want to do that this afternoon so that the sun has warmed the room slightly

today is a fluffy pj day
I hope you all have a productive calm and happy day
H x

twiggy86

Hi - friendly neighbourhood stalker, I mean cheerleader, here! I knew I recognised your name - but I've been awol for a few days so couldn't place you - Sorry!

I'm so pleased that your car was nothing major! I'm also pleased that your trip yesterday was better and you're feeling calm today.

Please can you teach my how you trained your OH?! I need to get my OH whipped into shape! For example, I knew he runs the tap when he's brushing his teeth, but I was in the bathroom with him the other day and apparently he runs the hot tap!?!!?!?!? Why!?!?! I did tell him off in a gently manner, but I'll have to sneak in there to see if he does it again!

I know this is cheeky - but is there any hot chocolate going?! :rotfl:

moneyonmymindsam

Hi ..I have had many lower than low moments in my life and reading your diary reminded me of some of them ...when I read.. I offered my rings I nearly choked with emotion...can I just say you sound like a great mum I am similar age to your son I would love a mum like you sounds like you are doing an amazing job
No one has ever given or done anything for me so remember that some of things you are giving your son are far more important than money.
p.s agree all the best people are nuts

Aaleigha

twiggy86 wrote: »

Hi - friendly neighbourhood stalker, I mean cheerleader, here! I knew I recognised your name - but I've been awol for a few days so couldn't place you - Sorry!

I'm so pleased that your car was nothing major! I'm also pleased that your trip yesterday was better and you're feeling calm today.

Please can you teach my how you trained your OH?! I need to get my OH whipped into shape! For example, I knew he runs the tap when he's brushing his teeth, but I was in the bathroom with him the other day and apparently he runs the hot tap!?!!?!?!? Why!?!?! I did tell him off in a gently manner, but I'll have to sneak in there to see if he does it again!

I know this is cheeky - but is there any hot chocolate going?! :rotfl:

how to train your other half - make sure he is sarcastic in the first place :) then he thinks he is taking the !!!!
oh and mine is doing dinner tonight too

and there is ALWAYS hot chocolate here - I will try to put the recipe for spiced luxury hot chocolate on here (nag me) its lovely and in a nice jar with a ribbon makes an excellent cheap gift

H x

Aaleigha

moneyonmymindsam wrote: »

Hi ..I have had many lower than low moments in my life and reading your diary reminded me of some of them ...when I read.. I offered my rings I nearly choked with emotion...can I just say you sound like a great mum I am similar age to your son I would love a mum like you sounds like you are doing an amazing job
No one has ever given or done anything for me so remember that some of things you are giving your son are far more important than money.
p.s agree all the best people are nuts

thank you so much for those lovely comments - I just wish my son saw it the same as you - it might be difficult for him but its his behaviour not mine - I will do what I can BUT he is not stopping me seeing that baby - I have just put a bid on a beautiful cot for the baby


some lovely news my daughter has been seeing a bloke (not met him yet) who she has only been with for 2 months but she is thinking of asking him to move in with her - he has a son who is five so someone to spoil (but only when I have my holiday paid for) I did buy a pram and knex for my sons girlfriends kids (about two weeks before she finished with him) I do think she should offer the stuff back - not that I want tainted rings and would never take stuff from kids just the principle

right off to have the dinner DH has put together for me

oh a no spend day - mind you it was a fluffy pj day and I am not going out like this

HappyNow

Aaleigha wrote: »

Happy Now YES I do have water rates to add - thank you I had not noticed I had missed them off -

Argh, sorry, I worded my post badly. You hadn't missed them off - they are on there at £69 per month. My query was that this seems really high, and I wondered if you had considered having a water meter fitted as this would probably save you money.


Monday's visits sounds much, much better and I've always wanted to watch a sniffer dog at work (although not in those circumstances obviously!). They are amazing.


Hope things continue to go well for you, you are really making progress

twiggy86

Aaleigha wrote: »

I will try to put the recipe for spiced luxury hot chocolate on here (nag me) its lovely and in a nice jar with a ribbon makes an excellent cheap gift

I'm nagging already as that sounds lovely!

Knitting_Nora

Morning Lovely!


I love sniffer dogs! When I used to work in London, I was forever getting told off by the police for fussing their dogs. Couldn't help it.. they're so blooming cute!!


*slurps hot chocolate* ooooo, that was just what I needed - you're an angel, ta.


So pleased to read about your most recent visit to see your son. Do you think it helped that you were determined to be as calm as possible, and to be firm with your son? I ask, because from the outside, it looks like you were really well prepared and totally in control of the situation and how you dealt with it. Atta girl!


And isn't a peaceful day just bliss? Especially if it involves fluffy pjs!


Right, off to pop the kettle on and catch up with the rest of the nutty club!


Have a good 'un!


Nora.xx